QOTW: "Helicopter Parents"
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QOTW: "Helicopter Parents"
| Mon, 10-02-2006 - 7:46am |
Board Question of the Week...
**Helicopter Parents**
Helicopter parents, these are people that always hover around waiting to fly in and fix things for their kids. These kids never learn how to deal with disappointment etc.
Do you know anyone like this? Are you like this?

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>>>BTW- DH took away all her sims2's, her manga books, and she can't watch any tv until she brings that grade up to a B. Bummer huh?<<<
Bummer? Nope....if she lived in my house she'd be lucky to eat with an F!! =)
I know, that's what dh said. No TV at all. She usually watches her shows while eating breakfast in the morning.
The grading system at the school goes like this; you earn points, you lose points. Whatever the points add up to is the grade you get. She's at an F now. She can earn the points and bring the thing up to at least a B or she will be grounded for life. That's what DH said.
You can look at her grades on-line. Minute by minute. The semester isn't over until Nov. Cool huh? That's what clued her in to tell us about the F. She knew I'd look on-line and freak out. Instead DH freaked out. She's not use to being held accountable like this. She's use to just aceing the test and calling it good.
I think it's an issue of letting go at the appropriate time and setting our kids up to handle problems on their own. Based on the articles I've read, I think the bottom line is if you feel compelled to call your 18 year-old college freshman's dean to change room mates for him/her or your 18-year-old requests or accepts you calling his/her college professor to complain/challenge grading, than you've not done a good job of preparing that child to take care of adult issues that they should be prepared for by 18. Junior and Senior years of High school are perfect years for parents gradually letting kids make autonomous decisions with mom or dad being their for correction if needed.
I know helicopter parents love their kids. The college years are pushing it with hovering parents. Pushing it further ahead 4 years: LOL ----Think of the 22-year-old new grad starting his/her first job at IBM whose mother calls their supervisor about scheduling, salary or assignments---- I think we could all agree that young adult would be eaten alive in the corporate world. Helicopter parents would crash and burn at that point along with the non equipped off-spring. No one wants that. So its all in how we deploy our methods to gradually equip our children to be ready for the adult world
Edited 10/3/2006 5:43 pm ET by jenny3kidsmom
I define a helicopter parent as one who intervenes in a way that prevents the child from learning a lesson or life skill. Talking to your 6 year old's teacher because he isn't being adequately challenged isn't helicoptering; calling the dean of housing because your college sophomore hates her roommate is.
I don't hover, but I do have some areas in which I'm a control freak. The kitchen, for example. I love to cook and am like a male cat when it comes to my territory ;-) Because of this unfortunate trait, I haven't really let the kids do as much as they should in the kitchen. They can microwave, but that's about it. It's not so much helicoptering because I don't want them to get hurt as much as it is trying to protect my "turf." But I'm working on it...
Nope I don't define myself as a helicopter parent!
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