QOTW...."ways to address adults"

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
QOTW...."ways to address adults"
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Mon, 10-16-2006 - 8:39am

QOTW: Here is a question submitted by one of our board members.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 11:38am

They must put a handle on it......meaning "Miss/Ms/Mrs/Mr".....


My kids say Aunt and Uncle to their aunts and uncles and our close friends that are like aunts and uncles. They have been taught that from the time they were born so we don't have a problem.






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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2003
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 12:55pm

For us it depends on who it is. At church they address everyone with a prefix

Linda
mom to
Alex (16), Rachel (14), Matthew (12)


Avatar for onehappymama
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 1:16pm
Quinn calls people what we call them. He doesn't call his aunts or uncles 'Aunt Sherry' or 'Uncle Randy', just Sherry & Randy. He calls his friends parents by their 1st names because that's what I call them by. He also calls all of our friends by their 1st names.
I think that it's more important to teach him to respect people/adults by his actions, not by what he calls them. My nephew calls me 'Aunt Cindy' but he is the most disrespectful child I've that I know. He is so rude & loud. His mother has an issue with Quinn not calling her 'Aunt Sherry'.
At school, he calls his teachers 'Mr Horn' & etc. When he was in the 2nd grade, his teacher was one of my best girl-friends. He called her 'Jayne' for the 1st week until he could get use to calling her 'Mrs Thompson'. It was sort of funny. At school he called her 'Mrs Thompson' but out of school, he would call her 'Jayne'.
I have a friend who is right much older than I am (she's in her mid 60's). All of her grandchildren call her by her 1st name, 'Shirley'. And they call her husband 'Garry'. Isn't that funny? She's a retired school teacher. They have the most respectful & smart grandchildren.
I grew up calling my aunts & uncles with aunt & uncle before their 1st names. But I call them by their 1st names now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 1:58pm

My kids are being raised to err on the side of formality, everyone is Mr. Or Mrs. Lastname until they are told otherwise.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 2:51pm

we too teach "yes/no ma'am/sir".....it's a part of my southern upbringing.


I had a problem being called "Mrs. so and so" also, but I prefer that over "Isaiah's mom, can I come over!" - LOL!!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 4:13pm

It's really interesting to me, there was a pretty big internet fight once on another board over the yes ma'm/sir thing and almost entirely the moms who were teaching it were southern.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 4:24pm
what was there to fight about?






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Avatar for bradleyteach
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2001
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 5:07pm

Yes, my kids call aunts and uncles by those titles.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 5:25pm

To be honest its not something we've ever discussed. I mean I've gone nearly 20 years without once addressing my in-laws by any kind of name. LOL I never called them Mr. or Mrs. before, nor by their fist names or Mom and Dad after we got married. Just managed to avoid the whole thing by looking them in the eye when adressing them. I have a feeling my DD does similar things. She calls some of her friends parents by their first names as some of her friends call me that. I have gotten the "Kristen's Mom" as a name and I correct them and say Tam. I do NOT want to be called Ms. A although I answer to it, I also answer to Mrs. M. which is DD's last name. I'm pretty flexible but I prefer my first name.


As a child one of my best friend's Mom's was my Grade 7 teacher. To this day I can't call her by her first name. She will always be Mrs. D. to me. Its just some kind of a mental block. My DD calls her Aunts and Uncles "Auntie Barb and Uncle Owen" because she hears me refer to them that way. With her grandparents my parents are "Grandma Ellen and Grandpa Gord" because it clarifies it from my ex's parents who are Grandma and Grandpa M. However when she is visiting my Mom and Dad she doesn't say "Grandma Ellen can I ...." Then she just calls her Grandma.


I think many Canadians are far more casual than many American's especially from the south. A child who answered me "yes ma'am" would get a funny look from me simply because it would be so far out of the norm. However if that is the norm where you live then no biggie. I think every family has to make these kind of calls based on their family and their community. Some things that are not acceptable in one community may very well be in another.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2006
Mon, 10-16-2006 - 6:56pm
My kids use a title unless told otherwise. I've wrestled with what to have kids call me. I didn't change my last name when we got married so Mrs. (dh's last name) sounds like my MIL and Mrs. (my maiden name) is my mom. I sure can't expect them to call me Ms (my maiden name) it's just too hard and it sounds funny to me. I usually say "just call me Ami" when asked. Many kids around here (Illinois) are taught to use Mr. and Mrs. When they call me Mrs. I just let it go. I grew up answering to two different pronunciations of my last name (my dad's family is still split on how to pronounce it) so I answer to just about anything. :)

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