Screaming? Yelling? Pushing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2005
Screaming? Yelling? Pushing?
10
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 2:02pm
I am just curious as to if your child does any of the above? I've talked to at least 3 people who I know who have kids who are teen/tweens. My best friend has a 14 yr old who speaks to her terribly, yells, swears, insults her mom, tells her she is moving out(good luck on that one)etc. I have another friend who has a 10 yr old and 12 yr old. Whenever I call she seems to get into a yelling match with one of her kids. Another friend with an almost 12 yr old says that her dd will scream at her, act disrespectful and push her. I've taught all my dd's from an early age that no matter what they think of me, they will treat me with respect. I don't allow them to raise there hands to me in anger or talk disrespectfully. That's not to say that they don't get angry and sometimes yell but I wouldn't classify it as screaming. I am also quick to tell them that they'd better back off when I feel that they are getting out of hand and they usually do. I was wondering what kind of behaviors other parents get from their kids of the same age group. It's amazing to me that a mother would allow her child to push her or put her hands on them. I learned from a very young age that there was a thin line that I'd better not cross. I even remember getting slapped once as a teenager when I made a nasty, foul mouthed remark to my mother. Though, I don't believe in physical punishment, I have to say that I kept my mouth shut from then on.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 3:31pm

Disrespect like you mentioned is not allowed and never has been, so no it isn't an issue with my tween.


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Registered: 05-15-2005
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 4:36pm
Like you guys there is NO way we'd put up with this kind of behavior - that's not to say they haven't gotten into little spats with each other and try it - but all have learned the punishment is NOT worth the try. We had one incident last week with my oldest daughter (middle child) who struck out at her sister instead of talking to her and her comment was "she was tired of talking". LOL Needless to say she really felt bad later in the day and couldn't sleep that night without finally going and saying she was sorry. I love that.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2006
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 5:09pm
Well with 6 kids there is some yelling, but always a punishment for rude and disrespectful behavior towards ANYone in our house!!! I also have a friend with a teen that is very disrespectful to her, although she has never been pushed by her dd!! I don't understand kids today, thinking they can do and say what they want no matter who it hurts or how rude it is!! I too got slapped for telling my mom to shut-up and on top of that it was in front of my boyfriend(he is my husband now!). I never dared to speak to my parents that way again!!
Virginia

                   

Avatar for bradleyteach
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Registered: 06-29-2001
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 5:21pm

Kayleigh has not behaved that way toward us and it certainly would not be tolerated, which I'm sure she knows, but that's just not really in her nature.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 5:52pm

My DD has never sworn at me, threatened to move in with her Dad (a nice built in threat for kids of single parents LOL) or ever laid a hand on me. She knows she would be in major major trouble if any of that ever happened. Well, she can threaten to move in with her Dad if she wants, but its never been an issue for us. We are not a family of yellers. You will rarely if ever find me yelling at my DD nor she at me. Its just not done in our home.


I really have trouble understanding parents who's kids do that. I know a mom of a girl the same age as my DD on another board and her DD will swear at her, if the Mom says no friends, the kid brings friends in the house anyway, if the mom tells them they have to leave the DD says no and they stay. Stuff I just don't get. If another adult told my child she had to leave their home and she didn't beat a fast retreat out of that house, her punishment would be as severe as the other child. I would be phoning the parents of those kids and telling them to keep their child away from my home, they aren't welcome I don't care what my DD told them. The woman is frustrated but how does it get that way? How do things get so out of control that a kid just outright disobeys you if you say " you're grounded" they say "F-you" and walk out the door?


I guess I just don't understand how that happens because as a child I would NEVER have pulled a stunt like that. Okay, granted I lived on a farm and had no where to go. LOL But the idea of it.

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Registered: 01-17-2004
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 8:04pm
Yea, not a chance of any of those shenanigans happening here.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2003
Thu, 10-12-2006 - 8:40pm
Alex doesn't do any of that. He is just a calm, quiet personality. Rachel will try screaming occasionally and sarcasm but it is quickly dealt with.

Linda
mom to
Alex (16), Rachel (14), Matthew (12)


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 4:00pm

Hannah does not cuss at us. She does not yell at DH. She on occasion yells at me but what do I expect. I yell at her. She's learning this nasty behavior from me.


She has to be respectful or their are consequences. Plan and simple.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 4:03pm
Welcome to the board Virginia. I see you snuck on in. Good for you and good to have you here. :)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2006
Fri, 10-13-2006 - 4:36pm
Thanks! I go to lots of different boards- from teens down to toddler/preschool!!
Virginia