If you've had a child/are pg, did pg/...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005
If you've had a child/are pg, did pg/...
9
Sat, 06-07-2008 - 4:19pm

If you've had a child/are pg, did pg/childbirth change your position?



  • NO. was PC, pg/child made me realize even more, this should be a WANTED exper.
  • NO. was PC, pg/child didn't affect my position at all
  • MAYBE. was PC but now feel there should be some restrictions on AB
  • YES. was PC, pg/child made me realize just what is being lost in AB, now am PL
  • YES. was PL, realized pg/birth a lot to ask of woman if not wanted, now PC
  • MAYBE. was PL, now think a lot to ask in case of rape/abuse, now PL w/ exception
  • NO. was PL, pg/child didn't affect my position at all
  • NO. was PL, pg/child made me even MORE staunchly PL
  • I haven't had a child/am not pg
  • OTHER (b/c who can think of every possibility ;)


You will be able to change your vote.


 


Powered by
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2006
Tue, 06-10-2008 - 8:38am

Being the freak I am I felt the need to vote other.

I was PL from the time I could form an opinion

First PG ended in miscarriage at about 14/15 weeks and I was PL and ANGRY. I was 15 and viewed every abortion as a personal insult that rubbed salt in the wounds that loss left me with.

Second PG also ended in miscarriage but I didn't know I was PG until after I miscarried. It while still PL it made me start thinking about contraceptive failure (I was on Depo)

Third PG happed using condoms, it was the most uneventful pregnancy in the world. Heck I was refinishing a house while pregnant and made it 8 cm contraction every 2 mins before I was informed I was in labor. DS was breech and I had placenta prevaria (sp?) so I had a section which was beautifully uncomplicated and healed easily. DS was a healthy 10 lb baby. I remained PL but started thinking about financial issues pregnancy can impose on people. While living without power with a one year old(it got turned off) I realized we need a lot more support systems if we don't want people to abort for financial reasons. If people are afraid ruin lays only a lay off away they are less likely to embrace the idea of Dependants

Fourth pregnancy all hell broke loose in my uterus. I nearly died and DS2 was born at 24 weeks and passed after 71 days in NICU. This is when I realized what people were afraid of. Heck I still have nightmares about that delivery (c-section, failed anestesia, massive internal bleeding, reparative surgery, blood transfusions) and started wondering about the fairness of my stance. In the end though I was still PL and still supported medically necessitated abortions although my line on medical necessity was a bit fuzzier.

fifth pregnancy was ectopic. It was abort or die and for me that was an easy choice as if I died the fetus was coming with me so I saw no reason for Ethan to loose a mother. I took the methotrextrate (sp?) and it failed. 2 days later I was in emerg with internal bleeding and rapidly falling blood pressure. I ended up in critical condition again and having emergency surgery and I started thinking about those women who could not afford to take time off work when these types of complications arose and those women who didn't have family support. I started thinking about what types of safety nets we needed so women would not have to abort "just in case" because they had no one to turn to

sixth pregnancy ended in an early miscarriage. Let me tell you when you leave the hospital thinking "while that was easy" you may be a bit jaded.

Through it all I have never wavered in my stance that a fetus deserves consideration in both the legal and medical issues abortion raises. I have never thought we needed elective abortion to be a choice or that making elective abortion illegal would make me a second class citizen. I do however realize that making elective abortion illegal will not stop it any more that criminalizing marijuana stops people from smoking it. Because of this I don't fight to make elective abortion illegal (like I would have at 15) I fight to make it unnecessary. I view all abortion linked legislation with a fine toothed comb to see where it may lead because I worry it would some day prevent even aborting an ectopic pregnancy or for severe fetal defects.

There are some people who will tell me that because I am not picketing clinics or working to outlaw abortion I must be PC but then PC doesn't want me because I don't believe in the RIGHT to choose elective abortions.

After 13 years consideration I have decided I am PP (pro prevention). The best way to kill an industry is to stop the demand for its services. The only effective way to do this is by education, stronger social programs, and a lot more support from all of us.










Photobucket
Photobucket
Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005
Tue, 06-10-2008 - 8:49am

Thanks for sharing all that Misa!

 


Powered by
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2006
Tue, 06-10-2008 - 9:24am

There is always room to debate.

Melisa










Photobucket
Photobucket
Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Wed, 06-11-2008 - 10:35am

I think pregnancy has strengthened my PC stance. When I saw my baby in the first ultrasound moving around, it was such a magical thing. But I was thinking about it later and I could see that for a woman who didn't want to be pregnant, what was magical to me could be horrifying and terrifying to her, like a little alien inside her body.


I strongly believe that it's better to abort than give birth to an unwanted child (exception: adoptive family waiting to take it from you as soon as it's born)


baby siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2006
Wed, 06-11-2008 - 11:24am

I am now CFBC, but I did TTC for a long time.

Lori
**Navy Wife to Eddie since Dec 2002**

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2007
Sat, 06-14-2008 - 3:36pm

I was PC before kids and it just made me MORE PC.


After facing the demands of pregnancy, newborn, infant, and now toddler not to mention the financial aspects and how it just ultimately changes your life and relationships....I can understand even more why women abort. I love my daughters. My 2 born daughters.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Sat, 06-14-2008 - 7:21pm

THis is kind of tough for me. I was always PC. But, not firmly PC. I am PC for other people. I do not think I have the right to tell someone else what to do with their body. But, I think abortion is killing a life.


However, after having my 2 girls, I am personally more PL than I was before. I will never say never but it would have to be my certain death (and only b./c I would not leave my girls without a mother) for me to have an abortion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2005
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 10:40pm

After facing the demands of pregnancy, newborn, infant, and now toddler not to mention the financial aspects and how it just ultimately changes your life and relationships....I can understand even more why women abort.>


 
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005
Sat, 08-30-2008 - 3:55pm

I thought it was worth bumping this up...at the time I bumped it, there were 76 votes, and 31 (41%) voted:

 


Powered by