Please provide me with some insite

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Please provide me with some insite
8
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 12:43pm
I am confused about some of the posts I've been reading here and I need some clarification.

For those of you that are PL...Are you against abortion BECAUSE of the fact that you believe that a fetus is life just as a baby is? Or are you against the procedure?

Do all Pro Lifers believe that life begins at conception or are there those pro lifers that are simply against abortion and are unclear on their opinion as to when life actually begins?

For those of you that are PC are you PC because you don't want to take away a woman's right to choose and don't find abortion to be a bad alternative?

For those of you that have had an abortion, do you feel that your experience caused you to be either PC or PL or did it not change your mind in either direction?? IE if you were PC and had an abortion did you stay PC after it?

Just some curious questions. I know how I feel about the subject but would like to know how all of you feel about it...

TIA for the input,

Mel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 1:45pm
I'm PL b/c I think the only logical place to draw the line at when life begins is at conception. Don't know if all PL's feel that way or not, I would assume so.
Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 2:10pm
I'm PC so I'll answer the relevant questions.

"For those of you that are PC are you PC because you don't want to take away a woman's right to choose and don't find abortion to be a bad alternative?"

I'm PC because I feel that reproduction, not unlike sex, is a personal choice. I don't believe that the Govt, or anyone else should be able to force a woman to carry a pregnancy to term based purely on arbitrary beliefs, religion and personal ideas of what is or isnt moral. Every woman must make her own choices, and then live with those choices.

I don't think abortion is a good thing. I think its a necessary thing. Until we have birth control that is 100% reliable, until women and girls don't get raped, or fall victim to incest, its a necessary option. Until every born child has a safe home, I don't think we need to be forcing women to have more children.

And, as importantly, though I of course know that an embryo or fetus is a living thing, its not a sentient being with feelings, thoughts, rights, etc. equal to those of a woman or girl. As such, a woman's rights supercede those of an embryo or fetus. At the point of viability, I don't think abortion should be allowed except to save the life or a woman, or, due to serious abnormalities in the fetus.

"For those of you that have had an abortion, do you feel that your experience caused you to be either PC or PL or did it not change your mind in either direction?? IE if you were PC and had an abortion did you stay PC after it?"

I've personally never had an abortion. But, I know many women who have. None of them have changed their views based on their experience.


MM 29 weeks, 2 days pregnant w/twins

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2003
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 2:16pm
I am PC. my Mom is PC too, just thought I would add that one. and she is 69 years old to boot.

"For those of you that are PC are you PC because you don't want to take away a woman's right to choose and don't find abortion to be a bad alternative?

For those of you that have had an abortion, do you feel that your experience caused you to be either PC or PL or did it not change your mind in either direction?? IE if you were PC and had an abortion did you stay PC after it? "

I beleive that a woman had a right to personal and private medical decisions inclduing the right to remanin pregnant or not. personally, I hate seeing abortion used as a form of birth control....but those women who do not want to be pregnant that badly even after being"irresponsible" are most likely doing the right thing by aborting anyways. I have had two abortions. I was PC prior to the procedure and was after. I ahve had three children, same thing. There are still so many dounble standards in this country. when I was 26 and after I had my second child i wanted to get my tubes ties. I was refused. but I had a male freind who was only 18 who was able to get his done two weeks after he asked to get a vasectomy. this is just an example of the way women are treated in America!


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 3:43pm
i am pc... i believe that every women has the right to make up her mind about abortion. do i think its the best alternative? no not really, but thats not for me to decide either. thats why i'm PC. i have had one abortion and it did not change my stance one bit. i just feel that there should be more counsiling before an abortion.

angel
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Fri, 06-27-2003 - 7:18pm
I am PL, so I will answerthe PL related questions.

>>For those of you that are PL...Are you against abortion BECAUSE of the fact that you believe that a fetus is life just as a baby is? Or are you against the procedure?<<

For me, it is both. I am against the procedure because of the fact theat the procedure is what kills the baby. I am against abortion in general because I feel that a baby/fetus/embryo, whatever anyone wishes to call it, is a human life, just as is the mother.

I feel that abortion should only be an option in cases where there is no chance of the baby surviving (such as an ectopic pregnancy) or in cases where the baby is not developing organs that it would require to survive (brain, heart, lungs, etc.) in these cases I would not look at abortion as murder, because the baby 100% not going to survive. In these cases, I feel like the mother should have the option of aborting OR carrying the baby to term and being able to have time to say goodbye to their child, and being able to have a little time to come to terms with the loss,instead of having her child ripped from her body.

I don't feel that rape is a defeinite justification for abortion, unless the victim is a very young girl who may not survive a pregnancy and delivery.

>>Do all Pro Lifers believe that life begins at conception or are there those pro lifers that are simply against abortion and are unclear on their opinion as to when life actually begins?<<

I feel that life begins at conception, and that is a lot of my reason for being against abortion. I am also against abortion because I personally ( and remember, this is just me) do not understand how a woman, whether she planned on getting pregnant or not, could willingly destroy her own flesh and blood, for whatever reason. To me, having an abortion is no different than killing your own born child. But again, that's just me.

Sorry for the long answer, but I just wanted to clarify as much as possible. --->Dawn

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-1999
Sat, 06-28-2003 - 9:30am
"There are still so many dounble standards in this country. when I was 26 and after I had my second child i wanted to get my tubes ties. I was refused. but I had a male freind who was only 18 who was able to get his done two weeks after he asked to get a vasectomy."

VERY true! After my second child my husband and I decided we were done having children and didn't want to take the 2% risk that birth control provided. So I was going to get my tubes tied. I was 23 years old, married with 2 kids, my own house, etc. I think I knew what I wanted. Unfortunately, I found out, the law here was 25 years old or 5 kids. So at 23 with only 2 kids I couldn't have my tubes tied until I had 3 more kids or turned 25, which ever came first. I was so outraged that I couldn't get it done. So my hubby at 24 years of age got a vasectomy. There were absolutely no laws on vasectomies. Now why on earth would there be a law against tubals and not vasectomies? Complete double standard that I think is completely wrong! ok, I'm done rambling now! LOL!!!

~Amie

Amie, wife to Ryan, mom to Tyler (10/98), Morgan (11/00), Alex (2/10), and baby #4 due 8/14

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 06-28-2003 - 11:27am
"For those of you that are PC are you PC because you don't want to take away a woman's right to choose and don't find abortion to be a bad alternative?"

I'm PC, and you're right in that I do believe women have a right to choose. But I don't think that abortion is a good alternative. Its the accidental pregnancy itself that is (often) the bad thing...when that happens, all three of the options are potentially bad. Unfortunately abortion sometimes is the best choice when faced with a bad situation to begin with. I'm PC because I believe that women and couples should have the option. I don't think every baby is meant to be simply because it was conceived...I don't think women should be forced to endure pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood if they truly feel that it would be wrong to continue. I don't like abortion...no PC person wants to see a woman have to go through it, but sometimes it is the best option.

"For those of you that have had an abortion, do you feel that your experience caused you to be either PC or PL or did it not change your mind in either direction??"

I have had an abortion...no, it hasn't changed my basic views on it...but obviously its forced clarification of my deeper values on it. It's too much to get into in one post, but basically its that when a woman is absolutely sure that its the right choice for her, then I fully support it. It has somewhat encouraged me to be more politically active, as I think that its a needed option for many. But it has encouraged me even more to push for prevention and more education for young people, to (hopefully) empower them with accurate information and a desire to be responsible and make smart choices in regard to contraception and relationships in general. I post on boards like the ones here on ivillage, have volunteered doing contraception/std education with Planned Parenthood, am the first to get a patient talking about these things in my work in an ER when its appropriate, and most importantly - I talk freely and openly about it with my friends and family. Its amazing the amount of misinformation (and plain old lack of information) that exists, especially among young people...

I was adopted, and I've also faced unplanned pregnancy and had an abortion. I've met my own birth mother, and understand why abortion is especially sad for women who can't bear children like my adoptive mother. Its for all of those reasons, and my strong desire to encourage prevention that I work hard in school - I plan to go into women's health, and hope to focus on women's public health issues and contraception counseling. It's quite rewarding, really...every time I think I've offered information and encouragement in a way that my patient or my friend or whomever understands, then that's one more woman - at least for now - who won't have to face making the decision. She won't have to deal with abortion, or motherhood before she's ready; and won't have to face the hearthache of giving away a child that she created but will never know anything about.

So no, it hasn't changed my basic views on abortion...but yes it has changed me.

`
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Sat, 06-28-2003 - 11:26pm
I agree that the law should not be that way, but I do see the thinking behind it. A tubal ligation is a risky surgery, and much more invasive than a vasectomy is to a man. It also carries more risks to the woman, should she later want it reversed, so the lawmakers want the woman to be of an age and frame of mind where the decision is more likely to be a permamnent one. I suppose they felt the cutoff ages were the most appropriate, though personally I feel it should be left up to Dr's practicing responsible medicine, not law. I completely agree that it is a double standard. Luckily, I was able to get my tubal at 25, with three kids. My ex SIL, however, needed a hysterectomy at the age of 20. This was a medically needed, though not life-threatening, situation. She was denied the hysterectomy until she became 21. She had two children by then, and she wanted no more even before she found out about her medical problems. But because of state law (Ga) she could not have this medically necessary procedure until she turned 21. How absolutely ridiculous is that?! Luckily she was only 4 mos. from her birthday when all this came about, because, had she been forced to wait an entire year, the situation certainly could have progressed to life-threatening. --->Dawn