Private Practice episode (m)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Private Practice episode (m)
19
Thu, 10-23-2008 - 7:12pm

I lurk a lot but haven't posted in awhile.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2006
Thu, 10-23-2008 - 9:33pm

Well, that would be a tough one. Personally, the idea of having another child to save one of my living children makes me a little queasy. I mean, what happens if the bone marrow transplant was unsuccessful, and the baby died as well. What happens if the bone marrow transplant was unsuccessful, but the baby lived, but lived with severe issues from being born prematurely. What happens if the bone marrow transplant is unsuccessful, and the baby lives, and then mom and dad cannot handle having lost their son.

Too many variables for me to decide, not being in that position myself. I guess if we had exhausted all other measures, and that was the ONLY way, then I would do it. I guess the hiccup for me would be the tremendous sense of responsibility that child might have if the older child did not live. Seems a pretty heavy burden to place on any child.

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."
~Albert Einstein
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." ~Albert Einstein
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2008
Thu, 10-23-2008 - 10:48pm

I would never conceive a child with a job to do. That, to me, includes having a baby to save a relationship or to help an existing child. I could only ever bring a baby into this world if I really wanted *that* baby. With that being said, if I felt ready for another child, I would hope that s/he could also help my existing sick child, but I would not expect it to. And I truly do not believe I would bring about an early end to my pregnancy in order to save my existing child. I would never be able to justify sacrificing one child for another. It could work out that both children would be fine, but it could also work out that my first child was helped and my second child was left with life-long disabilities that would then be entirely my fault. How could I ever look at my second child and explain why s/he has to live like that? Or, even worse, neither child could survive and that would be tragic, IMO.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
Thu, 10-23-2008 - 11:08pm
I read a book called "My Sister's Keeper" where the sister was basically concieved to be a match for the sister with Leukemia. The healthy sister decided that she didn't want to be her sister's donor and took her parents to court over it, unfortunately before the courts could decide healthy sister gets in a car accident and is brain dead and her parents use her as a donor anyway. Pissed me off!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 9:49am

Personally, I find the idea of 'saviour siblings' immoral and repulsive in the extreme. And in this case, where the birth was artificially brought forward so the tiny infant could be subjected to a marrow extraction procedure - yuck! She is their child too - how can they care less for her wellbeing than for her brother's? And what does that mean for her future life?

I'm very much with Addison on this one.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2006
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 10:38am

You know once upon a time I may have said basically the same thing you did but then DS2 was diagnosed with liver failure. They were talking about doing a live donor transplant in the future when he was strong enough. He was a micropreemie (24 weeks) so at that point he would not survive the surgery (he was 69 days)

My first thought was Ethan will probably be a match if we need it and then I came home and looked in the face of my then 3 year old and realized there was no way I could force him to go through that type of surgery without his consent. If push came to shove and no grown family members were matches I would talk to him about it but it would have to be his choice. I mean can you imagine how terrifying that kind of surgery would be to a small child and it is not exactly an easy recovery. It is major surgery. Now I had no doubt he would do it to help save his brother but it seemed immoral to not even ask his opinion.

Of course it got me thinking about donor babies because I have been on debate boards for far too long to not have had that discussion before and realized how incredibly selfish it is to birth a baby JUST to put them through pain to attempt to save another child. To purposely conceive a child that was not wanted and then force it to martyr itself for a sibling it doesn't even know. It is the equivalent of abducting someone off the street and stealing their organs or marrow without giving them any say in the matter. The only difference is in THAT crime the victim (donor) would be able to seek out legal repercussions against the person who did it to them but when it is a child conceived for the sole purpose of harvesting bodily tissues no one is there to speak for them.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 11:26am

I agree with most of the above comments. Addison was right, from both a moral and ethical standpoint.


If any individuals who are against embryonic stem cell research think this fictional mother made the right choice, I'd LOVE to hear the rationale.


Sandy
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2004
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 12:07pm
I find it immoral.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 12:10pm
(((Melisa))) What a nightmare scenario for a mother. Just wanted to send some hugs your way
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2006
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 12:21pm
Thx your hugs make me feel all warm and fuzzy ..... did yo spike your hug with wine?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2003
Fri, 10-24-2008 - 1:14pm
ROFLMAO_ naw- that was java- wine comes later, LOL!
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