Using my mom voice here
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|Sat, 04-19-2008 - 8:52am|
All right ladies I'm busting out my mom voice now so you have to read the rest of this post picturing me wagging my finger with the other hand on my hip. OK?
I have noticed a few things going on here lately that I have to say I am not crazy about. I am worried that if we don't get it under control on our own we are going to have some problems with post being removed/threads being closed. This is NOT directed at specific people but the board as a whole as I think we are all guilty of some of it from time to time.
1) Debate the issue not the person.
Sounds simple enough I know but sometimes the 2 can get so intertwined that it is hard to separate them. This includes not telling the person what they think feel. If you want clarification ASK.
ex. Oh so that means you think all disabled people should be murdered
Far different from
Does that mean you are for forced euthanasia of all disabled people?
One feels far more like a personal attack when you are reading it than the other does. Asking for clarification takes no more time to type than a flat out accusation.
2) be wary about opening yourself up for a debate.
This is a debate board. Anything you post in the debate section is fair game. It is best to debate situations as an abstract idea unless you have a REALLY thick skin. Just because it happened to you or you did it does not mean that people will feel it is ok.
ex. If you post that you had an abortion due to being raped you can not expect everyone to say "I understand you made the right choice" in fact you need to be prepared for people to possibly say the exact opposite
3) Third party insults are a violation of TOS. So person A post, Person B responds to A. Person C responds to B insulting A but omitting a name. STILL a violation. I have noticed a bit of this going on and really it is not necessary. Think about it, this is just like that girl in Jr high who talks loudly to her friends about the fat girl knowing the fat girl will hear her.
4) it is ok to NOT respond. You can put posters who rub you the wrong way on ignore. what you can not do is respond saying "I'm not talking to you" that defeats the purpose of ignoring the person.
Can you all just post and let me know you read this.
Again NOT directed at any one (or 2 or 3) people just a general reminder.