What about emotional repercussions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2007
What about emotional repercussions?
315
Sun, 01-13-2008 - 2:29pm

I haven't really read many of the threads on this board because they're so long so this topic may have already been discussed in length but...


What about the psychological effects that abortion has on the mother? I've known both rape victims and people who have just terminated their pregnancy for other reasons...and have experienced the deep regret and sorrow that these women experience as a result of abortion. Another eyeopener was reading testimonies of women on an HG (hypermesis: extreme m/s) board who had abortions to relieve their symptoms. Many of these mothers were devestated by the loss of their child. Granted this is a group of women who have wanted pregnancies but in a way this kind of applies to women who terminate wanted pregnancies because of mostly the POSSIBILITY of a birth defect (testing is definitely not a 100% sure thing). I just always find it funny that PLers are often accused of not thinking about the woman...when really I think abortion has the potential to be worse than death for the mother.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 9:32am

>No because that would be controlling women and as I stated that is not our intention....Also none of the things listed above are certain death...an abortion is certain death.

Sandy
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2006
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 11:28am

I know a couple of people who really should not have had children and now regret it. THe only problem is the children suffer.

I think it is better to not conform to the norm of "everyone must have a child" and remain childless than to bring a child into the world whom you are going to resent. My aunt and unle remained childless by choice (they are now in their 50's) and have no regrets.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 12:11pm

I am just tacking this onto the, current, end of this thread.


On the subject of "regret":


When I was 20,

"It is right to be contented with what we have, but never with what we are."

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2007
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 2:21pm

"Are you naming your daughter "Ellie" or is it going to be short for something?"

It's short for Elizabeth. Not a standard nickname for Elizabeth, but it caught me the day after we found out she was a girl. The other Elizabeth nicknames didn't seem to fit a baby, except Betsy, which I don't prefer.

"I hope you didn't feel forced but wanted to do it."

I was very overwhelmed by it. I was asked to do it, but we all knew that I had no real choice. It's a hard choice as a 14-year-old to give up your summer vacation and have to quit your part-time job (which paid more) to watch a very needy six-month-old while you are the only person home all day. This is especially true when you know that they have no other alternative and you can't say no. I babysat him nine hours a day, four or five days a week. I love my nephew very much (he just turned 15), but that was an enormous burden they asked me to bear. I probably wouldn't be bitter about it if my bro and SIL didn't pretend it didn't happen. My SIL says I only babysat him once or twice. She only remembers things she wants to remember, and she doesn't want to remember that she couldn't afford to stay home.

"I don't have my hand out asking for things...People offer and I accept."

And that is absolutely fine. What worried me was your response at the beginning of that post that other people could/should consider "family support" as a method of supporting themselves with a child they cannot afford.

I got married at 20 -- in Utah, which meant that everyone was asking when we were going to have kids. When I said that we couldn't afford it for awhile, I was told that I could easily go on welfare or get my parents to pay for it. I actually was told this by a few people who were my age with kids. I replied that I had been on the receiving end of that proposition more than once before and I didn't care to put my family through it again.




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Thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2006
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 2:29pm

~Are you naming your daughter "Ellie"

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2008
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 6:07pm
Please repost it, I'd be honest about what I think, if you promise not to hold my honesty against me, lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2006
Wed, 01-16-2008 - 9:08pm

But your WANT does not come before the fetus's RIGHT.


A fetus doesn't have rights.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 3:36am


This a bit OT, but:

baby siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2004
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 3:52am

<Please repost it>


OK. I'm going to retype it as I can't be bothered to trawl through the thread and find the original again :o) This is the Readers Digest version so let me know if you want more details.


My friend

baby siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2007
Thu, 01-17-2008 - 12:51pm

"A fetus doesn't have rights. "


No legally it does not.

Ella Grayce

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