What?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2008
What?!
275
Thu, 08-28-2008 - 9:44pm

Abortion is ok??!! I cant even believe this! Horrible! Yes I am a teen momma because I didnt have an abortion omg imagine if i would of had one, my baby wouldnt be here and I would b a mess. I AM PRO-LIFE:) Be responsible and step up. You had sex, got pregnant, now your a mom.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 9:02am
As someone who has been a part of the compulsory support system for a teenage couple who got pregnant and decided to keep the baby, I can say that things get a whole lot more complicated when you're forcing someone else to pay your bills or provide free day care. I wouldn't necessarily call the couple in my situation unfit, but they like most people in their situation took the rest of us for granted in a very noticeable way. It's my choice, so open up your wallet and pay for it.

I personally think 15-year-olds should be able to keep their babies if they choose.


I've never been a 'statistical' kind of person - unless I hear a statistic that is overwhelming one way or another.


I've known examples of all types - teens having children who are awful parents and drug addicts and unemployed, teens having multiple babies with different fathers and not caring one way or another, teens being responsible and stepping up to the plate, teens who adopt their kids...etc.


If you're middle class or upper middle class and have a child, chances are your parents are going to have the wherewithal to help you out, or at least you'll have a decent education so you can yourself get a job and support yourself and your child - even if it's a fairly low paying job.


For the poor, however, who overwhelmingly are having these babies, these support systems are just not there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 9:05am

"First of all, I think you mean anecdotal."


Is it really necessary to nitpick this sort of tiny typo?

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&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2006
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 9:14am

I by no stretch of the imagination believe every 15 year old should keep their babies. I have no

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2006
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 9:15am
Not necessary, but I prefer it if people point these things out to me, so feel free. I'd rather only make the mistake once. Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 9:36am

Understood.

melissajune21.jpg picture by ambersspace


&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 10:25am

<<

I'm sorry, I know that sounds harsh, but reality stinks, doesn't it? While all the noble people here talk about how 'great' it is to have choices, it's the poor of this country that suffer (mostly) from unwanted children; and society that has to raise them.
>>

IMO Your Nephew & His GF's problems started with the addictions, NOT being poor. Not all poor people make crappy parents and many, many MANY of them will rise above thier poverty to be the VERY VERY best Parents that they possibly can...I even know addicts that make pretty damn good parents despite thier addictions.

I used to babysit for a crack addict...the mom left him to take care of thier daughter. Despite his addiction he made sure his daughter was well fed and clothed and taken care of. The house was always pairly neat ( no worse then any other house that had a 4 yr old in it). Granted he could have been a better parent if he had kicked his habit..lol but there are lots of people with NO addictions who beat thier kids and whatnot.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 10:40am

<>

Age isn't a magic number by any means. When I was 17 I started TTC, not because I had some fanciful idea about having a baby and how wonderful it would be....but because I had health issues and I was seriously TERRIFIED that by the time I was an *adult* I wouldn't be healthy enough to have a baby of my own. I had a plan in place for supporting myself (which yes, did include a year of going on welfare)...but it was my utmost DREAM to be a mom. I never did have a baby until I was 21....That was Gods plan and I'm greatful for the chance to be a mother. At 28 I still don't drive because of my healrh issues....I can run circles over the bus system though ;) So I really don't have much more going for me at 28 then I did at 17. I'm still a better mom to my kids at 28 then my mom will ever be ( she had me at 25)...sure my mom drives, and had a high school diploma...but she's got serious issues and was emotionally abusive to me for most of my childhood.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2007
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 10:44am
Do you work?

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&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 11:06am

<<"That is why most people's eyes don't light up with joy when their 14 or 15 year old comes home pregnant."

They don't light up for joy because it is a hard road, and probably something they would not want for their kids.
>>
There are plenty of people whos eyes don't light up when thier married adult children wind up pregnant...age has about as much bearing on ability to parent as gladness or any otherr issue. It's all individual.

My friends mom was actually GLAD when she wound up pregnant at 16 because she had been fighting cancer for years and was glad she would be able to see at least one of her grandchildren before she died.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
In reply to: mommy_nycha
Fri, 09-05-2008 - 11:10am

<>

Gee...,my parents were married when I was born. They divorced when I was 2 and , except for a few occasions I never saw my dad again. They were both 25 when they had me. Age has NOTHING to do with maturity or ability to parent.

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