BFers hurting the cause...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
BFers hurting the cause...
21
Tue, 05-27-2003 - 11:17pm
Feeling a little attacked here on multiple fronts, and I have to say I can see where vehement BFers could do more harm than good by making others feel like a "bad mom." I am confident enough about my style of mothering that you are not going to make me change anything (unless I deemed it necessary based on DS's needs), but the way my choices have been addressed tonight would have to do more harm than good for someone who is trying to decide whether or not to BF. If there were only one way to do it (i.e. the AP way), I probably would have opted to FF.

I guess I'm understanding what the FFers were saying about a "holier than though" approach by the BFers. I'm feeling that way and I am a BFer! Something to keep in mind concerning the tone of your posts.

- Ingrid


Edited 5/28/2003 12:22:15 AM ET by ingrid_susan


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Avatar for cl_sunny_side_up
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 05-27-2003 - 11:25pm
I must say.....let it roll off your back. Like you said in your post, "I am confident enough about my style of mothering that you are not going to make me change anything." Stick to that:)


christine


~christine~

Avatar for luv_my_boyz
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Tue, 05-27-2003 - 11:40pm
Ingrid,

You seem to be in part referring to me. But I never said that you were hurting your child. I think in one of my previous posts I said that what you're doing seems to be working for you and what could be better than a happy, health mommy and child? Just wanted to remind you... My main point throughout that thread of posts was just that scheduling can be problematic for many nursing moms. Its clearly not for you. I haven't said anything about *your* mothering! We moms are so sensitive (I include myself)!

(Anyway, I thought you said we could have a truce!)

Danielle

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 12:21am
The "hurting" my DS part was referring to Fio's post. I am still just trying to say that we might do better to indicate there is more than one way. I meant that in no way as a personal attack.

- Ingrid


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 12:23am
Yes, I am letting it roll off my back. I just wanted to point out that some posts do more harm than good for those on the fence.

Thanks...

- Ingrid


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 1:05am
I don't really know what this is about, but AP is not the only way to bf. Here is a LLL link on mixing causes.

http://www.lalecheleague.org/llleaderweb/LV/LVFebMar03p18.html

Avatar for kfira71
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 8:42am
Ingrid, just wanted to say that I, for one, truly appreciate seeing your posts about BFing. I would not be considered AP by any stretch (don't BF, don't co-sleep, don't believe in babywearing, etc.), so it is encouraging for me to hear about a BFing experience that doesn't involve an infant latched on to my breast around the clock for months on end. There certainly *is* more than one way to BF (by the way, I'm the one who has talked about pumping rather than nursing for my next), and I do think that when some BFers refuse to see that, it can cause those who are on the fence to just say forget about it, why bother trying? Everyone's experience is different, and a single style of parenting shouldn't be used to define us all.

Anyway, good for you for doing things your way. Sounds like you're doing a great job to me.

~Kim

"Becoming a parent means agreeing to allow your heart to go walking around outside of your body."

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 9:45am
Thanks for being here to show us there is more than one way Ingrid. I appreciate your POV very much!

 

Avatar for luv_my_boyz
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 10:06am
AP is definitely not the only way to bf! I posted under a different thread that AP & bf are not mutually exclusive. You can even bottle feed and AP! I do attend LLL and there are a variety of women there- some AP and some not. The issue at hand- feeding on demand does not necessitate that you AP. AP doesn't mean that your baby is attached 24/7 either. (Though this may feel like the case in the beginning when you are establishing breastfeeding). Just wanted to clear a few things up!

Danielle

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 11:04am
Thanks for your post. I knew I couldn't be the only one on here who likes the idea of BF without the constant suckling. I just looked at your profile and saw that your DS is Jack Henry. You've probably noticed that my DS is Henry, and I love the name Jack! I'm working on DH to consider it if we have another boy someday.

- Ingrid


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 05-28-2003 - 11:05am
Thanks, Debbie! I think there are at least of few of us with similar POVs on this.

- Ingrid


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