BF'ing twins vs tendam nursing

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
BF'ing twins vs tendam nursing
5
Thu, 09-09-2010 - 9:53am

I have a question that has vexed me that I would like to out to this groups. I know some of you have experience with either tandem nursing a baby and toddler/preschooler or nursing twins and thus might have some special insight into this issue. I hear a lot of moms who get PG while still BF'ing express reservations about the idea of tandem nursing who would not express similar reservations to nursing twins.

So my question is what is it about tandem nursing a baby and toddler/preschooler that makes is seem so daunting a task then nursing twins?

For those of you that have neither had twins nor tandem nursed but would nurse twins if you ever had them, are you also comfortable with the idea tandem nursing? If not, why not?

To me it would seem that tandem nursing would be easier since the older child can easily latch on themselves and general will not be nursing as often as twins would.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
Thu, 09-09-2010 - 10:01am

I TN for more than a year. My older child was turning three the same month my younger one was born, and was already down to nursing three times a day before I had her. So when I introduced a third party to the nursing relationship, he already had set times of the day that he expected to nurse, as opposed to nursing on demand like she needed to.

If he had still been interested in nursing on demand, I think my TN relationship would have been much more difficult, and frankly, I doubt I would have lasted the year+ that I did with it, because I probably would have taken a more active role in his weaning process than I ultimately did.

I think I would have felt exhausted, drained and touched-out, and I suspect I'd feel that way about nursing twins sometimes too. With twins, though, I'd be much more likely to stick it out and suck up my negative feelings, because they would both be young and in need of an on-demand BF relationship with me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Thu, 09-09-2010 - 6:17pm
I nursed twins though rarely did I nurse them at the same time, I did better doing one at a time. I would have been open to tandem nursing too, though my kids are 7 years apart in age and the oldest was long weaned when the twins came along so I never was actually faced with the choice. My view is with two breasts, I could manage nursing up to three kids. Though I can also see feeling overwhelmed with little ones and pushing the older to wean so the whole thing can be avoided.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2008
Thu, 09-09-2010 - 11:59pm

I am currently tandem nursing for the second time, and it is an interesting question.

Robynne mama to Emily (3/26/99), Allison (5/13/02)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2006
Sat, 09-11-2010 - 5:54pm

This is purely my guess, I think some women who are OK with nursing a toddler think that it's just time to wean the older one once a baby is on the scene.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
Sun, 09-12-2010 - 1:10pm
My observation on this question have led me to the following speculations. I think for some they simply worry that the older child still nursing when the new baby arrives will lead to jealousy when from everything I have heard it can lead to less jealousy. I also think some mothers feel that toddler nursing at the same time as a new baby while be to difficult on the mother due to the toddler not being as easy and quit of a nurser. Toddler can more active and rougher when they nurse then a baby. I also think that for some it simply is psychological issue where they get a uncomfortable feeling about nursing a baby and a toddler at the same time though they can't exactly pinpoint the reason why. I think also that some mothers have reservation about nursing twins too but since they feel that nursing there twins is far more important nutritionally and health-wise then continue to nurse a toddler/preschooler they feel OK with weaning ab older child but would not feel OK about not nursing their twins due to this reservation.

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