Debate: What's luck got to do with it?

Community Leader
Registered: 10-01-2010
Debate: What's luck got to do with it?
34
Mon, 01-24-2011 - 1:55pm

Reading such comments got me thinking:

"I was lucky enough to breastfeed." - "Not all women are as lucky as me." - "I was lucky enough to breastfeed my son for a year" - "You're so lucky to still be breastfeeding" - "i was lucky to breastfeed for 9 months" - "I was very lucky with breastfeeding."

Do you consider yourself lucky to be able to BF - or to BF for as long as you did?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005
Thu, 02-03-2011 - 10:20am
frosted.cupcakes wrote:
I think when people say things like "I was lucky to breastfeed for 9 months," they might really mean "blessed," or "fortunate."

But, I do think being successful at BFing involves 4 basic things: luck, knowledge, determination and support.

I think how each mom's "recipe" is concocted determines whether or not she'll be successful or not.

So, a mom could have no knowledge, no support, but then get lucky with a perfectly easy baby with a perfect latch, and be successful. (I've seen cases like this on my ECs....) This mom wouldn't necessarily need the "determination" factor, because she just got lucky.

Or, a mom could have a whole lot of bad luck (like, having a baby with tongue tie, as one example), but also have knowledge on what to do about it, and proper support, and still be successful. She might need a little determination.

Or mom could have a tons of determination, a whole lot of bad luck (let's use the tongue-tie example again, and maybe throw in a c/s, a NICU stay, jaundice, etc), no knowledge to know how to fix it and where, and no support, and still not be successful.

Or a mom could have a whole a lot of bad luck, no knowledge and no support, but LOTS of determination to keep going, and figure out ways to get that support and knowledge, and be successful based on sheer will.

I think when people feel bothered and/or insulted by the term "luck" is those who fit my last example. For them, luck doesn't have anything to do with it. But for others, depending on their "recipe" of the 4 things, luck has a lot, or at least some place, to do with being successful at BFing.

Very well said!

 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 2:54pm

LOL!





iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2010
Wed, 02-02-2011 - 12:19pm

Kevali


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Tue, 02-01-2011 - 9:32pm
I think when people say things like "I was lucky to breastfeed for 9 months," they might really mean "blessed," or "fortunate."

But, I do think being successful at BFing involves 4 basic things: luck, knowledge, determination and support.

I think how each mom's "recipe" is concocted determines whether or not she'll be successful or not.

So, a mom could have no knowledge, no support, but then get lucky with a perfectly easy baby with a perfect latch, and be successful. (I've seen cases like this on my ECs....) This mom wouldn't necessarily need the "determination" factor, because she just got lucky.

Or, a mom could have a whole lot of bad luck (like, having a baby with tongue tie, as one example), but also have knowledge on what to do about it, and proper support, and still be successful. She might need a little determination.

Or mom could have a tons of determination, a whole lot of bad luck (let's use the tongue-tie example again, and maybe throw in a c/s, a NICU stay, jaundice, etc), no knowledge to know how to fix it and where, and no support, and still not be successful.

Or a mom could have a whole a lot of bad luck, no knowledge and no support, but LOTS of determination to keep going, and figure out ways to get that support and knowledge, and be successful based on sheer will.

I think when people feel bothered and/or insulted by the term "luck" is those who fit my last example. For them, luck doesn't have anything to do with it. But for others, depending on their "recipe" of the 4 things, luck has a lot, or at least some place, to do with being successful at BFing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Sun, 01-30-2011 - 5:49pm

What I meant was that I wouldn't say I was lucky to be able to breastfeed (as per Catherine's examples), but I would say I was lucky (I just happen to like the word fortunate better) that I had enough support to go beyond the age where most people would quit. Lucky/fortunate that I had that combination of things that helped me achieve my goals WRT breastfeeding.





iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2010
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 1:59pm
yeah, that's why I like the word "fortunate" better. :-)

Kevali


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2010
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 1:59pm

Kevali


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 11:51am

LOL, don't worry, you're not rambling.





iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2008
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 4:44pm

Lucky to me represents something like winning a raffle or a million dollars in the lotto. It is something completely random that drops into your lap, that you cannot anticipate in advance - even f you appreciate the fact after it happens. Being able to breastfeed cannot normally be said to rely on this sort of random luck or chance happening - where some women get the luck, and others miss out on it in a random fashion with nothing anyone could do about how things turned out. Imagine rolling a die on the day your baby was born and if you got a six, you could breastfeed; if you didn't well you would not be 'lucky' enough to breastfeed. That's luck

Fortunate in this case is being grateful for your circumstances in life. I suppose if you really want to twist and stretch it, their is an element of luck in that also, but not to the extent of being completely random. We do have by and large, some control over our own situation and destiny. And for a mother who starts out in life, it is possible to do something about self-education and seeking good support, and carve out a better destiny for yourself. This is not 100% certain, don't get me wrong - I mean, if you have the misfortune to be a victim of an earthquake in Haiti, or something like that, there is a whole lot less you can do for yourself.

Now, no doubt you can appreciate being fortunate, and you can appreciate being lucky. But I hope my ramblings have shown how luck is perceived as a different concept.

Teresa

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Thu, 01-27-2011 - 4:04pm

You say that you have been fortunate.





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