Inappropriate places to BFIP??

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Inappropriate places to BFIP??
1096
Tue, 02-17-2004 - 10:48am

Is there anywhere you feel it is completely inappropriate to nurse in public?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:10pm
there ARE quotes among each of those posts...
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:15pm

Good point, I never thought about that.


The longest any bottle watered sat on my counter was a day.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:25pm
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Yes you are making absolute sense to me, I feel the same way. Bonding is something that is so unique, personal and complex that it cannot me measured or compared, IMO. To me bonding is in the same catagory as Love. Can love really be measured? I suppose the intensity of love can vary, just as the intensity of a bond can vary, but neither love nor bonding is a tangible thing that can be quantified or understood by third parties. This is why it irriates me so when a BF'r tries to suggest BF babies bonds are at some different level than FF ones. How can anyone know anything about the love or the bonding shared between people other than themselves in their own relationships? And to generalize and say that BF kids are bonded better? There are way too many other factors that affect love or bonding. We can only know what *WE* feel and as I've said, I'm personally secure enough with the strength and intensity of the bonds I have with my children that I don't need to compare it to anyone else's and say it's better or worse. People who need to do this have 'issues'. JMO.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:31pm
its truly wonderful that you have them...i wish i could same the same. though, even had we been prepared w/the camera i don't think i could've waited for the staging ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:34pm
hmm...so its all about manners again....

To us it is just hard to focus when you know someone is breastfeeding>>>>i got the impresson that you've never been in the presence of a bf-er (in the same room)? do you have problems "focussing" if they're down the hall and you know they are bf-ing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:34pm
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I can understand why a FF would take offense wrt talk of a "higher bond". I guess where I've netted out is that I believe infants who are formula fed are more at risk of having attachment issues than their bf counterparts. Some ff children will be securely attached, some will have attachment issues. Same goes for bf children. I just think the risk of poor attachment is greater among ff children.

This is *completely* anecdotal, but I know few ff's that roomed-in with their infants after delivery. On the contrary, almost every woman I know who bf roomed-in. I sense a different mindset among my friends who ff (not all, but most).

I don't know where I'm going with this, but maybe women who are less maternal tend to ff and therefore we see more "anti-attachment" behavior, for lack of a better term, among these women. Personally, the women on this board, you included, seem very maternal so perhaps this bonding, attachment argument is a moot point.

BTW, speaking of "feeding method" -- to me that is a very sterile phrase (to borrow a word from sunflower). Bottlefeeding may be a feeding method, but bfing is much, much more complex than that.

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Very true, but I think less likely.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:38pm
I think what makes these kinds of pictures so special and magical to us mom's is when we look at them we remember the way we felt at the moment. You know how with really adreniline-filled events the details get burned into your mind? That's how my deliveries are for me. I remember every detail about those last moments when I delivered them and then saw them for the first time. With my first I distinctly remember concentrating so hard on pushing at the very end that I'd kind of zoned out...everything around me went silent as I concentrated, when suddenly, breaking the silence was this cry...the cry of *MY* baby, the baby I had wondered and dreamed about for what seemed like an eternity was finally real. There are just are no words to describe what I felt inside at that moment...definitely a pivotal moment in my life. (Then again I'm sure all the Mom's who are reading this knows exactly the feeling I'm talking about)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:44pm
There's nothing like that feeling. I was actually looking forward to childbirth this last time-yes it's painful and scary at times, but it was/is the best pain in the world. It's like one moment in time where everything just stops and before you know it it's passed.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:52pm
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Yes indeed...(though I might clarify, for me it was the most *worthwhile* pain, since I can't say I really enjoyed those intense contrax's B4 my epi's. ;) ) But nothing in the world can compare to the anticipation and excitement of a birth...

The funny thing is, I was not a big fan of pregnancy at ALL...but delivering really agrees with me. I know some people who had the opposite experience (loved the nine months, hated the last day!).

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 1:56pm
This is in regrads to bfip when there is someone uncomfortable with it which, as we've all discussed, is more common than not.

"I'm all for breastfeeding and support breastfeeders, but common courtesy and manners are also of utmost importance."

"That someone else may very well be full of hang ups and ignorance, however, it's my opinion that common courtesy dictates it's rude and just un-classy to do something that someone has politely asked you not to do."

We'll have to agree to disagree on this one. I feel that it is completely disrespectful and selfish to ask a bfing woman to leave the room. Ditto for making *her* feel uncomfortable. I think you have to be a bfer to really understand this.


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