"Proud Formula Feeder"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2004
"Proud Formula Feeder"?
1054
Thu, 12-14-2006 - 8:27pm

In my playgroup, I've noticed some members have a blinkie I haven't seen before: "Proud Formula Feeder". In the past, I've seen the "Formula Feeding Mom" and "It's formula, not rat poison", but this new one struck me as odd. I can understand simply stating that you formula feed or saying that formula isn't rat poison (because it isn't), but I've been trying to figure out just why someone would be "proud" to FF.

While I don't think that women should necessarily feel guilty about not BF, I don't get what about FF there is to be proud about. Most (or maybe even all) of the women with said blinkie acknowledge that breastmilk is better, so why would they be proud to feed their babies something they know is substandard, even if they couldn't BF and FF was their only choice? What do you ladies think? Is/should there be such a thing as FF pride?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 6:14pm
Did you see anyone about the pain?

*´¨)
¸.· ¸.·*´¨ ;) ¸.·*¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·'*Cathie*


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Cathie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2006
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 6:21pm

may not be able to afford to see an IBCLC or to join LLL?


LLL is free.

siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 6:43pm

"Just out of curiosity, seeing as I am going to be nursing my first child here in a few weeks, how much does "real life help" cost? Does insurance cover any of this cost? And of course, did it occur to you that the women who are so frustrating because they don't "want your freaking help" may not be able to afford to see an IBCLC or to join LLL? Maybe it's financial, not a simple lack of dedication."


Less than formula.

*´¨)
¸.· ¸.·*´¨ ;) ¸.·*¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·'*Cathie*


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Cathie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 7:16pm

NO I don't expect to have guilt free parenting but let me put you in my world at the time....

I was suffering from Post partum depression...I didn't know it at the time because I was never "officially" diagnosed with it. I just wasn't IN the know as far as PPD at the time. I was trying to do the BFing thing as best I could with NO help....I didn't know there were so many resourses out there that could help me. Had I known, I might've sought out their help and tried something different but I didn't know. The nurses at the hospital were gruff and impatient with me so it made ME uptight about the whole thing. When I say I did my best I guess it could be better said by saying I did the best I could with the limited resourses I had. I am not in any way saying that if BFing went better that I would still think formula is the better option. I guess I have to refute myself...in an earlier post I said that Nature isn't always best. What I should've said is Nature isn't always the doable option....In any event, I was so emotional, I was not sleeping and I was in pain. I was trying to feed him every 2 hours and sometimes it would take me an hour and a half to get what I thought was enough food into him (another casualty of lack of information, I never knew how much he would eat)...so I had to do something. So I pumped for another 5 weeks (12 total with some form of breast milk)and just stopped because I was afraid of what to do when I went back to work. So, I will say that I tried, tried hard...

I still contend that when you are emotional and are trying to come to terms with feeling like a failure as a woman due to your inability to breast feed, the last thing you want to hear is some stranger say to you (unsolicited, I might add)"what is so important that you have to do that you can't sit there and feed your child all day if you have to??"..I'm sorry but that was no way to "win me over" to the BFing side of town....I would never do that to someone who felt that stopping was the way to go....(especially if I had no clue who the person was!!)

Mel.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 7:17pm
Yes, I was told to apply hot packs and take a shower....It never helped.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 8:26pm

I doubt you'd find anyone here who would challenge you that you didn't do YOUR best with what you had or in the circumstances - just that it doesn't make it THE best, and I think from your post you understood what I meant.


One of the problems out there, and something that probably hurt you in the process, is the general belief that alot of women "can't" breastfeed so sometimes formula is best.

Cathie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 8:39pm

I think we do understand each other. I think if every female was given the correct, helpful, non-judgemental, informative, (and yes sometimes sympathetic) information about BFing, there would be more women who would opt to BF. I don't think formula is the best,what I meant was exactly what you said, it was best for me at the time in my current situation... nor do I think it's the worst option. I just think it IS an option and for that I am eternally greatful. I envy women who can do it and continue to do it in the face of pain, inconvenience, etc. But I do contend that because of the pain and anxiety that Bfing caused me two things happened...One: it took me 7 weeks to be able to begin to bond with my DS and two: I vowed I would never breast feed any other children I may have and that is what happened. DS #2 was born and I never even attempted it with him. had I gotten let's say a more gentle version of the truth (yes, there is pain associated with it at times but let's see what we can do to fix that), I may have stuck with it longer with DS #1 and tried it with DS #2.

Mel

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2006
Tue, 12-26-2006 - 10:23pm

Now would be the time to find out. :o)

You have time to ask questions, find someone you feel comfortable with, arrange for a visit at the birth center/hospital, run questions past your insurance provider and generally add to your level of preparedness.

The response to the "Breastfeeding Sucks" letter said it's best to find an ICBLC *before* the birth, so's not to be caught needing help and it not be available for what ever reason.

ilve2read

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 2:49pm

I'm a little late in the game here, but I saw your comment about nursing through reflux.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
Wed, 12-27-2006 - 2:59pm

I am tlaking about having blinkies and baby t-shirts advertising that you are bf'ng or ff'ng. I do not see the point in advertising that point to the world. I do not understand any type of advertising such as that.


Again, a tad late in the game, but I wanted to comment on this as well.


Why shouldn't we advertise that we're BFing?

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