"Proud Formula Feeder"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2004
"Proud Formula Feeder"?
1054
Thu, 12-14-2006 - 8:27pm

In my playgroup, I've noticed some members have a blinkie I haven't seen before: "Proud Formula Feeder". In the past, I've seen the "Formula Feeding Mom" and "It's formula, not rat poison", but this new one struck me as odd. I can understand simply stating that you formula feed or saying that formula isn't rat poison (because it isn't), but I've been trying to figure out just why someone would be "proud" to FF.

While I don't think that women should necessarily feel guilty about not BF, I don't get what about FF there is to be proud about. Most (or maybe even all) of the women with said blinkie acknowledge that breastmilk is better, so why would they be proud to feed their babies something they know is substandard, even if they couldn't BF and FF was their only choice? What do you ladies think? Is/should there be such a thing as FF pride?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2006
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 10:41am

I agree with you 100%, which is exactly the reason why I was with WIC in the first place. I figured I could sit around and complain about my tax dollars going to fund formula or I could do something about it.

Our WIC had a lot of success with breastfeeding moms and I was *really* proud of our program. There were women that I know would never have considered breastfeeding if they hadn't had access to the breastfeeding support through WIC.

I don't know how we can turn the tide on attitudes about breastfeeding, though. People have been trying for years and breastfeeding rates are much better than they were, but they're still not very good. Taking a more in-your-face approach, such as with those tv ads, doesn't seem to be effective because people find them offensive. I do as much as I can to educate friends and family, but at the end of the day, I'm one little voice against a chorus of "formula is perfectly fine!"

I'll tell you something that demonstrates how ingrained formula is in our culture. My 6 1/2 yo daughter was breastfed until just after her 5th birthday. Since she was only weaned 1 1/2 years ago, you'd think she would know that this is the way that babies are fed, right?

When she came to see her new baby brother the first time, she actually asked, "Where's his bottle?"

RPS

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2003
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 10:46am

<

When she came to see her new baby brother the first time, she actually asked, "Where's his bottle?">>

I know what you mean. DD weaned just a few months ago (at age 3.5), but she still insists on putting bottles into her dolls' mouths. She's not really too into dolls, but we have a few and she managed to see the bottle one doll had before I could throw it out.

Avatar for mrsmichael6300
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 11:19am

I don't know Vicki...I do see your point, that formula does help babies without access to breastmilk survive, but the issue here is necessity. If we devoted the same time/energy to wet nursing/donating milk as we do to manufacturing/marketing/promoting formula, then there would be no need. The deviation from the norm in the case of not producing breastmilk isn't with the baby -- it's with the mother who can't produce. The baby is still biologically wired to receive breastmilk, it's just not avaible from its mother. There would still be the rare baby who needs the special formulas due to true milk allergies/galactosemia, etc., of course, and those cases, yes: formula is truly a lifesaver.

I suppose that I see surgeries/treatments to correct deformities and defects as a technological advancement; I view formula as a step backwards and an obstacle (since without it we would have found other means as society to overcome the problem of no available breastmilk, though I realize that's not a perfect scenario, either, since historically wet nurses were only available to the very rich and the babies of the poor starved or were fed a formula concoction instead).

The argument provided also makes little sense to me since a mother who *can* breastfeed is choosing to deviate from the biological norm, whereas the mother whose baby requires surgeries to correct a defect or deformity did not consciously choose that for her child (yes, barring exposure to teratogens, which the mother may have consciously caused). I just can't wrap my head around justifying the choice to use formula by arguing that we defy nature on most counts so this is just par for the course. So? I call it the "we can, so we should" argument. Don't know about that...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2000
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 11:52am

I don't disagree with the "we can deviate from nature, so it is okay that we do" perspective. I did disagree with the formula didn't save lives statement, and I should have been clearer.


I certainly wouldn't use my description to justify the general use of formula.


I donated my freezer stash of EBM to another mom through


* Milk Share *

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 12:47pm

apparently their ped said she has "failure to thrive" (not sure what that means... is it a subjective term?)


Failure to thrive (FTT)

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CL for Reflux
 
"That's the
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 12:48pm
a tad.
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CL for Reflux
 
"That's the
Avatar for trinaf
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2003
Fri, 12-29-2006 - 11:48pm

Somehow (I'm not sure how since everyone else in my family FF) I managed to convey bfeeding as normal to my girls.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2006
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 12:26am

I just wanted to add my thoughts on this...I am a FFing mom and maybe when they say they are 'Proud' maybe they mean that they take pride in formula. I mean they could just do regular milk and then give their baby some vitamin supplements but they chose formula.

I tried breast feeding all 3 of my kids and it just wasn't for me I tried for two weeks with all of them, I wasn't enjoying it and when I had to go back to work it was too much like a chore so I moved to formula and was very happy with my decision I have no guilt or regrets.

It bothered me when you said "so why would they be proud to feed their babies something they know is substandard" that is insulting! I am proud that I am giving my kids very good formula, I am happy with my decision not to continue breastfeeding. When you use world like 'substandard' is what makes moms need to defend their decisions to formula feed, to me when you say that you might as well be tell me that I am not feeding my kids right.

For one person to say that another can't be proud of how they are feeding their babies is wrong...LET THEM BE PROUD!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 1:03am

<<>>

There isn't anything insulting about saying that formula is "substandard"... that's just a fact. It is less than standard nutrition... adequate in most situations, but still not equal with breastmilk, which is the standard nutrition for human infants. If a parent knows this and is comfortable with their decision, that's fine... but it's odd that someone would be proud of this fact. Unfortunately, most people don't know that formula is "substandard", they think it is "just fine", "close enough", "very good", etc.

It's a little like saying "Carseats just aren't for me, but I do make my toddler wear his seatbelt, so I'm proud of that." A seatbelt might offer some protection, more than riding without one, but not as much as a properly installed carseat. Would you consider it insulting to tell this person that seatbelts are "substandard" methods of keeping children safe in a car?

Why be "proud" of making a choice that puts a child at a higher risk of illness?

Stephanie
mom to six sensational kids!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2006
Sat, 12-30-2006 - 10:55am

It bothered me when you said "so why would they be proud to feed their babies something they know is substandard" that is insulting!


Do all facts insult you?

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