"Proud Formula Feeder"?
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| Thu, 12-14-2006 - 8:27pm |
In my playgroup, I've noticed some members have a blinkie I haven't seen before: "Proud Formula Feeder". In the past, I've seen the "Formula Feeding Mom" and "It's formula, not rat poison", but this new one struck me as odd. I can understand simply stating that you formula feed or saying that formula isn't rat poison (because it isn't), but I've been trying to figure out just why someone would be "proud" to FF.
While I don't think that women should necessarily feel guilty about not BF, I don't get what about FF there is to be proud about. Most (or maybe even all) of the women with said blinkie acknowledge that breastmilk is better, so why would they be proud to feed their babies something they know is substandard, even if they couldn't BF and FF was their only choice? What do you ladies think? Is/should there be such a thing as FF pride?



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I think FF mums can handle the truth however, each person who FF has threir own story. Some choose and they are different from those that had honest difficulties.
I was thinking that breast feeding is like someone who chooses to stay in shape from one who does not. There are risks to being out of shape. That does not mean you will become sick, you just have a higher risk. Some people have a harder time staying in shape then others. That does not mean they do not try. My mother is one of them and I know she wants to however, it is not always possible. I do not comdemn her because she cannot. My gran'ma eats horribly and never excercises and she is 90! We all know people who defy the odds. Should they eat right and stay in shape? Of course, however, it does not mean that everyone will have problems when they do not.
I formula fed because I could not breast feed. Does it mean I absolutely could not have? Probably not but at the time, I could not and I want to do better next time. And all I can say is that with Kylie, I am doing my best to make up for what was lost. So far she has defied the odds...
Spud...
**>>Every time the topic of risks associated with FF comes up, I get this image of Jack Nicholson shouting "You can't handle the truth!"<<
And then you wonder why you are accused of judging/making people feel guilty. Amazing.**
HUH??? I can't get a line from a Tom Cruise movie out of my head so that proves that I'm hell bent on making FF feel lower than dirt for their choice? Well, guilty as charged I guess.
"Actually, when I learned this, it was huge relief to me.My diet is a work in progress but it used to be much worse. It helped me knowing that even if I was making a poor choice for ME, it wasn't affecting my breastmilk.
I do tell women that they can diet while breastfeeding but a lot of misinformaton regarding diet out there. For example, the earlier post which suggested that all women would have to meet with a dietician in order to make sure their breastmilk is as "good" as formula. There are a lot of people who are likely to believe that they may be harming their infants because due to their poor diet, their breastmilk might be "missing" something. I would think that knowing that women can still provide for their infants in famine would reassure them that they really can't screw up at this one, nature designed it to work that way. They will be harming their own health but so would a poor diet and not breastfeeding."
You have a point, of course if a woman is really concerned about her poor diet she should be taking her prenatal vitamin to alleviate some of her fears. As far as the prior poster, she was a bit off her rocker, IMO, and I *don't* think she was indicative of the attitudes that exist out there. I think if women are concerned that dieting might affect the content of their breastmilk they should be encouraged to eat as healthily as they can and rely on a supplement for the rest (that's really all most of us can do anyway). I still think the whole 'starving women in 3rd world countries' bit is a tad over the top in most cases.
Let me clarify. I don't actually mean that FF "can't handle the truth." It's just an image I get whenever I think of anything in life that we tend to gloss over the risks of, and I found it kinda funny. Didn't think it would be taken so literally! Heck, I say it to myself when I drink a diet soda. I *know* those artifical sweeteners can't be good for me, but I just ignore my instincts and chugged it down. Then Jack pops into my head...
(not directed at you, Mary!)
"I started a response to this, but then I re-read it and now I'm thinking there are two ways to take your response...can you clarify what you meant by the above?"
Certainly. 10% of communication is verbal. 90% is non-verbal. If this is indicative of the perceptions/attitudes the poster has towards ffing mothers, *of course* they are going to feel judged by her. The 'you can't handle the truth' comment is absolutly dripping with sarcasm and condescention. She would have to be a pretty good actress to be able to cover up the kind of perceptions she holds about ffing mothers, in order for them to *not* feel as though she is judgemental towards them. Maybe she would *never* say anything like that IRL, but she doesn't have to *say* anything. Often an eyeroll can say it all - of course the eyeroll can be denied much easier than the actual statement. If I'm wrong, and she truely is able to hide her true feelings all the time she shouldn't be here on ivillage - she should be running for office :).
"HUH??? I can't get a line from a Tom Cruise movie out of my head so that proves that I'm hell bent on making FF feel lower than dirt for their choice? Well, guilty as charged I guess."
See the following please:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-psbfvbottle&msg=2831.619&x=y
"This is kind of what I feel. That there is a lot of extreme examples and things that are slipped in...I just have to say that I agree here.
I think it is wonderful that I have found a place where I have learned a lot however, extremes are not neccessary...just something that I have been finding a lot lately again in a lot of posts!"
Glad to hear someone else feels the same way :)
Would like to add that the arguement in favor of bfing is *plenty* strong enough to stand on its own without all the superlatives. I think the extremes only serve to alienate people, not inform them or open a dialogue.
<<10% of communication is verbal. 90% is non-verbal.>>
Perhaps IRL, but
<>
Now, Mary, you *know* I think all FF are bad mommies whose children are condemned to a life of disease and dumbness.
Steph, who just loves to dig herself in deeper.
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