Should moms feel guilty for smoking/pg?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2006
Should moms feel guilty for smoking/pg?
5
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 5:49pm

Do you think moms should feel guilty for smoking during pregnancy?

Do you think there are many moms out there that are not aware of the risk of smoking during pg? Would you think it odd if a mom said, "Nah, I'm not even going to try and quit?" Would you say something to her about it? Should her doctor?

Should we make a law banning smoking during pregnancy? j/k

I don't see the point in feeling guilty about it and most moms I know do try to cut back anyway. Just musing.






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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 6:37pm
Do you think moms should feel guilty for smoking during pregnancy?



I don't think any people "should" feel any certain way. Some do, some don't. Either is okay in my book.



Do you think there are many moms out there that are not aware of the risk of smoking during pg? Would you think it odd if a mom said, "Nah, I'm not even going to try and quit?" Would you say something to her about it? Should her doctor?



My mom was unaware at the time she was pg. I would think it odd if a mom today wasn't even going to try, the risks these days are very widely known and even smokers seem to accept the negative messages. I don't know if I would say something, it depends on the context in which I knew her and how it came up. I definitely think it'd be smart for her doctor to say something to her.



Should we make a law banning smoking during pregnancy? j/k



Ha. What would the penalty be? j/k



I don't see the point in feeling guilty about it and most moms I know do try to cut back anyway. Just musing.



There might be a point to feeling guilty, or it might just be an emotion or experience she needs to work through.

"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser."

John W. Gardner



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"The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding."
Malcolm Gladwell Blink

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2010
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 9:36am

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I'll bet most do. You'd have to be living under a rock not to know how harmful smoking is, in and of itself. During pregnancy that message is everywhere. I don't think you can get pregant if you're living under a rock, lol!

However, choosing to continue smoking is not the same as choosing not to breastfeed. For the vast majority of smokers, once you're hooked, it's not really a choice in the same sense. Yes, many choose to quit, and are successful. Some even stay that way after they have the baby. But nicotine is an addictive substance, as addictive or even more so than heroin. http://www1.umn.edu/perio/tobacco/nicaddct.html. Most smokers are addicts, plain and simple. Their brains have been wired to find reasons not to quit. I say this not because I have extra sympathy for smokers, but because I am a recovering nicotine addict myself.

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HOnestly, I'd think she was just saying that because it's easier than saying "I can't quit, I need to smoke." Sometimes it's better to sound callous than to sound weak. Again, I know this from experience. What I would say to her is that there is help if she does want to quit, and tell her that if she ever decides to do so, I'm here for her. Then I'd leave it at that. If this isn't a friend we're talking about, I probably wouldn't say anything. And yes, I think her doctor absolutely should say something.

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I wish nicotine was illegal, but that'll never happen. :-)

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I agree.

Kevali


Kevali


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 11:58am

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I'm not really comfortable saying how anyone "should" feel, but I bet many (most, even?) do.


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No, probably not.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2006
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 2:17pm

Do you think moms should feel guilty for smoking during pregnancy?


I honestly think it needs to be up to each mom to decide for herself how she feels about all the different things she does during pregnancy.


Do you think there are many moms out there that are not aware of the risk of smoking during pg?


I wouldn't think so.

2010 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 1:44pm

I did (and still do) feel quite guilty about smoking while pregnant but was never quite able to quit.

DS was born 16 weeks early and later passed away as a result of his prematurity so for the rest of my life I will wonder if he may have stayed in a but longer had I quit but it is something I will never know. Even after him I couldn't completely quit for DS3.

If I had my time back I never would have started all those years ago

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