Why do women give up on bf so easily?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Why do women give up on bf so easily?
95
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 9:42am

I realize that "easy" is a relative term, but it seems to me that many women give up bf'ing over little things - things that are easily remedied.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 11:11am
I think that it's different for everyone. But I really think lack of education is the biggest one..combined with lack of support. I don't know about USA, but in BC Canada over 80% of women leave the hospital nursing. I don't think "laziness" is a reason for most women who quit...although I'm sure it happens sometimes. Hell! I breastfed BECAUSE I was lazy! LOL! (and of course it was better for the baby and I). Old fashioned attitudes I think are another reason. Lets face it..most of our mom's didn't do it, and we live in a society that "sexualizes" breast quite a bit. I think many women are programed to think that bf'ing is sexual in some way..that they're "dirty" for doing it. I know it sounds perposterous to us...but some people feel that way...otherwise..why would people get so upset about NIP?

Avatar for queen_brat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 11:58am

Grrr I had this typed out and my cable decided to go nuts!!


I think the main reason some give up so easily is the way they think about formula. If you think formula is a great alternative and 100% nutritious why would you suffer though sore nipples caused from this or that? I don't think you would. But if you belive with all your heart that bm is best and formula is inferior then your going to go though more to make sure nursing works out. Just my 2 cents.


I also think lack of support is a huge reason some give up to easily. I was there and almost threw in the towel. I had no one to turn to but a great and loving support board that got me though it (Michelle I will start peeking in again over there I owe that board a lot!). Without that board I would have had no one and I am not sure I would have made it! I had hubby but he wasn't thrilled with me nursing this time.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 12:30pm
You know, perhaps it's just not THAT important for some people.

 

Avatar for kfira71
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 12:42pm

Yes, this is just what I was thinking. I know that, for me, that was the case. I was excited to try BFing, but I truly felt that if it didn't work out, or was causing lots of stress and difficulty, then I'd have no problem switching to formula. I'm sure that someone who had an "I will breastfeed at all costs, no matter what happens" attitude would not have let what happened to me stop them. As the OP said, it was just one case of mastitis. But to me, it was four days away from my baby that I wasn't willing to repeat, and BFing was simply not important enough to me to make me want to "persevere."


~Kim

"Becoming a parent means agreeing to allow your heart to go walking around outside of your body."

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 12:44pm
Michelle, Can't speak for anyone else, but my biggest obstacles have been w/ the so called medical professionals and their lack of knowledge. W/ DD#1, I can honestly say I was ignorant to BFing. Even though I had taken a class, I didn't know any better to supplement that info w/ more research. I had falsely assumed that natural meant easy & didn't take the time to educate myself properly. I had an LC say it was perfectly fine to supplement w/ formula & that was the only time I saw her. I got no real education from her about BFing. The night nurses who meant well & wanted me to rest would give her a bottle of formula and dummy me didn't know any better. I figured these people should know what they are talking about-Boy have I learned ALOT in 10 years of parenthood about the medical profession.

When DD#2 was hosp. w/ jaundice, the nurses tried to get me to give her formula & our ped intervened.

J&S

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 12:57pm
I agree with what some of the others ahve said that it's an attitude thing. I thnk a lot of women decide to "try" breastfeeding because they feel they ought to but have no qualms switching to formula at the first hint of trouble because "it's almost as good and after all I did try".

What I will never understand is those women who go through great difficulties to breastfeed only to wean at 3 or 6 months because "that's when you wean". For me, having a rough start to breastfeeding made me determine to nurse for as long as possible in order to get the maximum payoff from those early, hard weeks.

Isabel





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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 1:17pm
Hmmm...I don't know. I didn't give up on BF until my LC told me it was probably best. I had a "breastfeeding at all costs attitude, and I thought I could handle anything. The baby flat-out refusing to nurse was a new one on me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 2:28pm
DS1 weaned at just over 7 months. I didn't really look at it as me giving up on bf-ing, though. He was waking every 2 hours through the night, I was exhausted, and I had ppd. So I started sending him to my parents' house a couple nights a month so I could get some rest, and we started supplementing with formula so dh could take over some of the feedings (I had a lousy hand pump and was never able to get much ebm). Eventually, DS1 started preferring the bottle over the breast, and I just didn't have it in me to give up all artificial nipples so we could get back on track with bfing. So we switched to formula. He thrived on formula, and with my hormones back to normal, my ppd went away, and he started sleeping through the night, so weaning was a good choice for us. I am a SAHM, and I had no complications from bfing (thrush, mastitis, etc.), but I still felt that the benefits (for myself and for my DS)of being a well-rested, energetic, happy mother was more important that him getting breastmilk.

DS2 is 8 months old and still mostly breastfed. He gets a couple bottles of formula (or EBM...I have a better pump this time) a week so I can rest or get out by myself. He nurses the rest of the time, and it's working well for us. It would be better if he slept through the night, but he's still waking once to eat. There have been plenty of times where I wanted to wean him because of the exhaustion and ppd, but we're hanging in there. I will probably wean him somewhere between 10 and 12 months.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 4:39pm
EXACTLY!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 10-31-2003 - 8:01pm
I breastfed my two babies somewhat sucessfully but I have to be honest and say that I would have weaned for any one of those reasons that you meantioned.

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