18 or 21 for Adulthood???

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2012
18 or 21 for Adulthood???
34
Wed, 02-06-2013 - 2:29pm

Am a mother and step mom with 6 children in all........

i would like to see if we can get a debate to congress to raise the age from 18 to 21 for children to be able to make decisions on their own.....

what do you think? i have views to support but i would like to get views from other parents and 18year olds as well.

Let the debate begin!!!!!

Thanks

LC

Thank YouLaughing

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 9:47pm

I think the bigger general question is how responsible and mature 18 year olds are today than they were in the turn of the century... Times are different, Heck, my grandparents married before their 18th birthdays - and they didn't have to lie to do it either. You can't compare those days to the lives kids are dealt today.

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2011
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 6:03pm

what defines a legal adult? Unlessthey are willing to hike up the age where someone can enter the armed forces then that is a tough one. Legally an 18 year old can look abd perform in adult activites such as porn.lol Buy things off the internet, Smoke, But they can't drink. But they can get married without your consent.

If you want to hike up the legal age to prevent drug abuse. Sorry then you may as well hike it up to 100 years old because drug abuse has no age boundaries.

As we keep babying our kids they will never grow up. I have an 18 year old now. and he is on the Asperger's spectrum. But it doesn't prevent me fom telling him I am technically no longer responsible for him and I can legally toss him out of the house if he doesn't like my ruless(yes hehas rules and no I won't actually do i)

At the turn of the century 16 was the age of consent and in some states it is younger. If you don't want your 18 year old to make medically dicisions for you then don't make him/her your Health Care Proxy,  Select someone else.

The main reason we are allowed to keep or kiods on our heealth polcies is because it is hard for 26 year old and younger to get it. But One the other hand if they have jobs thy should contribute towards it. I have al;ready told my 18 year olf if we keep him on our car insurance he will pay for his part. I refuseto baby him And no one should baby their kids

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 4:04pm

 I agree with Bord,  it is not an age issue. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 4:03pm

   It is not totally true that we cannot find out what our adult children are being treated for.  They can sign the form allowing the parents access.

  Also when they used  our insurance plan   the statement from the insurance agency came to us.  So doctor visits were not secrets.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 3:56pm

At what age do you think that a person should have all the legal rights of adulthood?

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 3:24pm

Are you talking about the story of the kid who over-dosed on adderrall? Yes, It is interesting that we secure laws like HIPPA but can't find out what our "adult" child is being treated for, esp if they are still covered under a parents plan.  I think it's easy to assume that the parents didn't know but maybe they did and just left it all up to him to decide for himself which is another can of worms,  I don't think 18 is adult enough. 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2012
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 3:22pm

Its very sad no matter the age i do get it i would think it would hurt more if it was a young adult that as a parent we still have the a bility of responsibility which is different if you are a mature adult.....

And yes i was meaning the story about the adderall which i agree is another can of worms!!!

Maybe i could ask about something else....... do we as really know if our young adults are happy where they are and the situations they are in if we are to say you are 18 and an adult or they say to us am 18 am out of here.......it is great that some have a good objective of leaving and some may be running away from something have we thought about that?

Thank YouLaughing

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 3:06pm

I would feel horrible, just like I would feel if it happened to someone who was 21, or 25, or 50. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2012
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 2:51pm

Thank you all for the points and its interesting to get the different views, if congress cant change then ok but some of us parents would understand where i would be coming from if for example i say changes in HIPPA laws....... there are cases and one recent where our children who are "adults" are misleading doctors in prescription drugs and they are getting high dosage of something that they claim is bad and the doctor is not aware that really the patient does not need it but has presented (fake) that he is in bad shape.

As the parent we are the ones in contact and intouch with our kids all the time and we know what is going on and we are not given the chance to get the information on what is going on with our child because its doc and patient privacy.........

A family now is going through mourning because they have lost their son due to that, where he pitched himself to the doctor and the doc is now in regret for prescribing the medication.

How as a parent would you feel if this was to happen to you?

Thank YouLaughing

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Thu, 02-07-2013 - 10:29am
So what, we have the authority to conscript children to serve in our military?