questioning parents during times of tragedy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2006
questioning parents during times of tragedy
64
Mon, 07-23-2012 - 6:44pm

Sorry, I have to just go on a little bit of a rant here.

I'm sure by now everyone has heard about the tragedy that befell Aurora, Colorado at the movie theatre. Sad, sickening, revolting. Yet you know what I keep reading online? People questioning the judgement of the parents for taking little kids and babies to a late showing movie. Really?

I was incensed that people would look at this tragedy and begin pointing fingers at anyone but the shooter. What good does it do to question the parenting practices of those in the theater – the victims? It is akin to wondering why a rape victim was dressed scantily at a bar. It is disgusting.

There are people out there who abuse, neglect, and torture children. We're really taking THIS time of tragedy to pass judgement on something so benign? Really?? Like this couldn't have happened just as easily during the day?

How about the millions of other questions we should be asking? About gun control, security in public places, mental health evaluations, etc?

This just makes me very angry. I feel HEARTBROKEN for anyone who lost someone there, regardless of age. It's tragedies like this that makes me wish I hadn't brought kids into this messed up world to begin with!

Awhile back, I posted an article about a local, teenaged girl who was killed by her ex boyfriend. Her father is someone I've known for a long time. Basically, they had sex under a local bridge and that's when he killed her. His reasoning was because "she was doing drugs and I didn't like the changes in her". There have been comments in the local paper along the lines of "where were this girl's parents? She was doing drugs and having sex under bridges?" And let me tell you....she had wonderful, loving, parents who simply adored her. She was a bit wild, perhaps, but it's nothing that her parents did wrong.

Man, things like this just make me so damn angry!

Angie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2001
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 12:41pm
I'm confused. Are you saying that deadly assault weapons should be legal because some people will go to extremes and break the law to get them illegally? Seems to be no point in traffic laws then. People speed, drive drunk, and run red lights all the time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2003
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 11:40am

The contrast with gun control is that we do have the power to change those laws, access to them, etc.

This isn't true. As pointed out, you cannot control access to illegal gun purchases.

This is like saying, making sure marijuana is illegal means people won't have access to it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 10:54am
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2006
Sat, 07-28-2012 - 9:41am

The contrast with gun control is that we do have the power to change those laws, access to them, etc.

I do not think that is true. We do also have the power to change the laws that protect seriously mentally ill people from treatment.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2003

http://gunvictimsaction.org/fact-sheet/fact-sheet-illegal-gun-trafficking-arms-criminals-and-youth/

What’s not well-known is that the vast majority of the approximately 12,000 annual gun murders and 66,000 non-fatal shootings are committed by people who have no legal right to a gun. How do criminals and other prohibited people get guns so easily? Through a highly efficient, organized, and profitable business of gun trafficking that moves guns from legal manufacture to dealers to criminals and young people who can’t buy guns legally.

http://www.mayorsagainstillegalguns.org/downloads/pdf/inside-straw-purchases.pdf

"there is a large of diversion to the illegal markets from licensed gun establishments"

So again, I am forced to wonder if the illegal gun trade would cease to exist simply because we change the legal ways in which a person can buy a gun .... and, of course, I wonder what the stats are for illegal gun trade in other controls members are comparing America too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2001
Of course limits on automatic weapons would reduce the number of murders by gunfure. It's very clear that states and nations with strict gun control have fewer murders.

My first reaction to this situation was thst we need to destigmatize mental illness and ensure that people have access to psychological care.

The two are not mutually exclusive. Address mental health care and rethink the legalization of assault weapons that make mass killings as simple as pulling a trigger and holding it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2003
Fri, 07-27-2012 - 9:06pm

I don't think you are oversimplifying things. I actually agree with you. :smileyhappy:

Just wanted to add, that is another issue. I would imagine  many people obtain guns illegal. I doubt many people planning a murder go to their local Wal-Mart to purchase a gun or a gang member, is most likely getting their guns through illegal avenues. So, when people want to compare countries, there is another issue to look at.

But, yeah, I agree, it's like trying to solve gang problems through gun control. I also wanted to add, I do not believe people should have access to military weapons, but when discussing massacres, in particular, I think there's other weapons one can choose if they are determined to murder a group of people.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2003
Fri, 07-27-2012 - 8:57pm

I don't know how you figure that. The stats offered, by another member, I thought were for all murders, not just massacres.

There was also an argument that the U.S. vs other countries, dealt with the issue of anxiety and depression, at the same rate .... so, yeah, I posted general information. I don't think I was mixing up anything, just posting in accordance to what was being discussed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2006
Fri, 07-27-2012 - 8:28pm

Your post seems to be mixing up garden variety anxiety and depression with serious mental illness, but one had this quote:

The more random a massacre, the more likely it is that serious mental illness plays a role. It is conceivable that the killer in Colorado suffered from schizophrenia, an illness that often appears during late adolescence or early adulthood and is frequently marked by an inability to distinguish fantasy from reality or to be in touch with other people. Most schizophrenics never kill anyone, but a few lose the capacity to think clearly about themselves and others, perceiving that everybody is out to get them.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/opinion/understanding-mind-aurora-mass-killer-article-1.1119651#ixzz21s9iAyRm

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2006

While I think the issue of gun control is definetely one to be addressed, I agree it is only one small piece of the puzzle. Mental health issues and awareness are a huge part of the issue. It's like saying that gun control will solve the issue of gangs, without looking at all the issues that lead a young person to join a gang in the first place. Sorry if that is oversimplifying the issue.

Angie