Should Children Be Forced to Write Thank-You Notes?

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Should Children Be Forced to Write Thank-You Notes?
Wed, 01-23-2013 - 10:09am

Are good manners going the way of the Dodo bird? While most of us were raised to write thank-you notes promptly, it seems some of us haven’t passed that bit of etiquette onto our kids. 

Philip Galanes, New York Times columnist and author of the book, “Social Q’s: How to Survive the Quirks, Quandaries and Quagmires of Today,” discussed the disappearing thank-you card and other etiquette dilemmas facing parents on TODAY.

Galanes recounted the story of a grandmother of nine who wrote to him that she has never received a thank-you card for any of the birthday and Christmas presents she has given her grandchildren over the years. She was annoyed, but unsure how to demand a bit of gratitude – a predicament that offended Matt Lauer, father of three. “I think it’s unacceptable that they don’t write any thank you notes,” Matt said.

Should children be forced to write thank-you notes?-

Where do you stand on the issue? Should children be told to write thank-you notes each time they receive a gift?

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Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Wed, 01-23-2013 - 12:04pm
Manners are learned and I still find myself nudging my kids and asking they write thank yous, Lol.. It's not so much xmas as it is important to me that they thank a relative who remembers their birthday. DD2 did get a treat bag from her special ed teacher and I did tell her to write a thank you but that's an out of the ordinary thing, She's in 8th grade now and this is the only teacher who still thinks of her at Christmas! Having said that, I only remember writing thank you notes for big events like hs and college graduation, my wedding. I would find it incredibly rude if gifts for formal events like those were not acknoweldged with written thank yous, JMO.