Should You Vacation Without Your Kids?

Avatar for cmkristy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Should You Vacation Without Your Kids?
Mon, 07-15-2013 - 8:41am

A sunny beach, a cool drink, a good book, and no kids saying “Mom, watch me build this sand castle.” It’s the recipe for the perfect getaway for some. So should couples try to occasionally recharge their batteries by taking a vacation without the kids?

For every parent who says it’s crucial to spend some time away and travel without the demands of being “Mom” or “Dad,” there’s one who believes children should never be left out of a family trip or who feels tremendous guilt for leaving a baby behind with the grandparents.

And it turns out, neither travel philosophy is a hundred percent “right.”

Where do you stand on the issue? Would you (or have you) ever take a vacation without your children? 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2010
Mon, 07-15-2013 - 1:03pm

It was only after my kids grew up did I realize how wonderful vacation was without them. If I had to do it all over again I'd compromise and do some with and some without.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Mon, 07-15-2013 - 4:18pm
So much depends on individual circumstances. We didn't have family around willing or able to watch our kids for a weekend or longer, so we didn't do it. The cost of hiring someone for an extended period of time far outweighed the potential benefits.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Mon, 07-15-2013 - 4:26pm

We started taking trips without our children with our 20th aniversary. Since then we have gone away for the weekend for most our our anniversaries.

Longer vacations alone we did not do until our children were all adults.

I see no issue with taking a trip without children with some exceptions.   If there is only enough money in the budget or allowed vacation time for one trip per year then I think it should be a family trip.  If budget/time allows for more than one trip per year I see no reason why there cannot be a family trip and a couple trip.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Tue, 07-16-2013 - 12:40pm

We have done this a few times, for short trips. We had my parents fly out to take care of the kids because we don't have family nearby, and it seemed better to spend the money on their flights out than to hire a paid caregiver.

I think it can be very good for your marriage to do this, but only if it doesn't cause more stress (financial, emotional) than it alleviates!

Our last trip without the kids was just an overnight, and we left them home alone (they were 17 and 15). At first, I was a little nervous, but we all ended up having fun, so it turned out to be a very positive experience.  

 We are actually hosting one of DD's friends, whose brothers are at camp and whose parents are spending the week on Martha's Vineyard. She's 18 and not a wild child by any means, but her mom thought she'd be better cared for in our house than home alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2012
Tue, 07-16-2013 - 6:28pm

Yes, please. ; )

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Wed, 07-17-2013 - 9:52am
We haven't done it in our marriage yet, but only because we have not had any family around that could watch the kids for any legnth of time. We have had a few one nighters, but that's it and its such a refresher for us, we are looking forward to real "long weekend" vacations without the kids soon. I do think its important for parents to have alone time without their kids, and an occasional vacation is good for the marriage, just like date night.