Help? - Spirtuially lost?
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|Thu, 03-27-2003 - 1:26pm|
Let me first start out by saying that I'm not sure I believe anything. My Husband and I were married Catholic 8 years ago, and had all of our Children babtized Catholic (much to my Dismay( We mostly did it for he and his family.
I have a Daughter who is 7 years old and She is terrified of Death, I know realize that it is because we have raised her with mixed religon, and She hasnt' been to church in a long time. I have strong problems with my "faith" and not sure where to turn to, I have done tests on belief.net and they came up something I am totally not interested in.
One religon that some of the background appeals to me is Mormon, I'm not sure why especially being that I am on the verge of Atheisim. I guess it is the strong family background, views. ect. But, I also know that I don't buy some of what they have to say either! - HELP!
I don't care for the Catholic religon, I have been there, Done that, and I just don't care for it. I want to be "happy" at Church, not down in the dumps. I really want my children and my family to be a religon household, and I know I emphizise a lot of the "church" aspect of all of this, but It is very imporntant to me! I need to feel at home and happiness when I am at church, I was a Babtist for a while when I was younger, and that was a lot of fun. When I go to church I want to feel like I am family there, I like to have a church that has functions, Dinners, Friends, all kinds of things. Am I wrong to want these things in a religon? - Or does all of it have to come from my heart? How does one who is totally spirtually lost "find" god. When I was younger I used to have a lot of questions for older adults, priests, pastors, ect.. They all would tell me "You will know when you find god": well, 30 years later and I don't know???
Anyway, I am at a loss, I don't have any clue what to do. If I just let things sit the way they are my Children are going to grow up with no background, no religon, no faith, and that scares me! At this point I am almost willing to force myself for a while just so I can find something that is going to make me happy. We have a few friends who are religous and they are Catholic, for about a year we were going to church every sunday and I kind of liked it, I *know* I liked the way I felt when I left church, but like I said, it didn't last long. and the actualy Mass was so depressing and rehearsed?? ( I hope that makes sense)
What should I do? Should I spend a good month going around "church and religon shopping"? How horrible does that sound? I wish I could get the rules of the Christian church, with the family and tighteness sense of the Mormon church, I realize that god said he doesent have to be worshiped in brick and stone meaning the church, but for *me* and *my* family I think it does. I need my Children to have Sunday School, Friends, a NON FEAR of Death, and all the things that comes with religon. If you read this far you are a saint ( no pun intended) LOL...
I need help, I really do. What am I going to do?
Thanks so much for sugesstions!!