Affording to Stay at Home

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-01-2007
Affording to Stay at Home
1968
Wed, 12-12-2007 - 12:20am

Ever notice that those moms that SAH are usually (although not always) more well off than mothers who WOH? It seems to me, based on what I have seen, that while most women enjoy working their jobs and having a professional life outside of the home, some women prefer to stay home with their kids for a certain amount of time - whether it be 1 year or 10 years - and those women have the option to do so, while other women wouldn't even consider the option because they feel they can't afford it.

Well, it has been my experience that most women who do stay at home have

1) husbands who support the idea

2) Husbands who probably earn enough (or almost enough) to support the family.

3) Enough money to support themselves without working.

**Now I am not talking about people who get help from government agencies, I am speaking about women who do it with no outside help - just seems like most women can't because of financial reasons. So, is being a SAH mom now an "upper class" phenomenon - in general? Of course there are many SAH moms that are middle class, but if they chose to have paying jobs, they'd probably move right back up into that higher income bracket.

Blythe

http://beaworkathomemom.blogspot.com/

Working on being...Supermom!

Blythe http://beaworkathomemom.blogspot.com/ Working on being...Supermom!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 7:56am
I see; you can't possibly do what you want without being selfish. Missed that memo...
Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:04am

that's how it WORKS in her world silly -- doing what you want is selfish , being thanked for volunteering is insulting, having fun is unheard of.

"If gay Americans are not allowed to get married and have all the benefits that American citizens are entitled to by the Bill of Rights, they should get one hell of a tax break. That is my opinion,"

- Jeane "Dear Abby" Phillips, in an interview with Lisa Leff.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:20am
Yes, my values are misplaced, and yet I'm supposed to understand if the kids think their vacations don't measure up to their friends' vacations.
Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:24am
seriously. My heart doesn't really bleed for Liza if mummy doesn't get to take her on the grand tour of europe or skiiing in Vail.... LOL. I'm saving my A** off for a Disney trip next year when she's in fourth grade - we've been planning and saving for a year already and I'm happy that I 'm showing her how to save and plan an dnot rely on the good old credit card to get you there....
"If gay Americans are not allowed to get married and have all the benefits that American citizens are entitled to by the Bill of Rights, they should get one hell of a tax break. That is my opinion,"

- Jeane "Dear Abby" Phillips, in an interview with Lisa Leff.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:30am
OT, but I just remembered something. A couple of weeks ago, when I was in a HS financial aid parents' night, the guidance counselor said that if you put a 529 college savings plan in the grandparents' name, then you don't have to declare it when applying for financial aid. Of course, there might be tax consequences on the grandparents if you do it that way, but maybe not. I wish I had known that when we started our college savings years ago, because at least one set of grandparents would probably have been okay with it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:41am
No, I don't think the kids would be harmed, financially or otherwise.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:43am

You're right, mostly, but our housing choices would be much more limited, we'd both have longer commutes, and there's no doubt that our SOL (not SES) would be much lower.


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Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:44am
I can ask my financial advisor about that -- it's not realistic to put it in my mom's name since honestly if she's here next year at this time I'll be suprised and I'm not sure if I can put it in her name given the restrictions on her income for medicaid (they went over everything to make sure she wasn't hiding money in someone else's accounts. Which is hysterical since she has exactly um nothing. LOL) . But my ex's parents may have somethig set up - it wouldn't suprise me if they already did.
"If gay Americans are not allowed to get married and have all the benefits that American citizens are entitled to by the Bill of Rights, they should get one hell of a tax break. That is my opinion,"

- Jeane "Dear Abby" Phillips, in an interview with Lisa Leff.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:47am
But when families have all the financial bases covered, or if the SAHP going back to work wouldn't give the family a financial advantage (I know, that's not your situation or mine, but for lots of posters here, it is), preferences become more important than "outcomes."

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2007
Thu, 12-20-2007 - 8:50am
Thinking you getting to do what you want makes others happy is self serving to say the least.

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