All this talk of financial contribution

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
All this talk of financial contribution
584
Thu, 07-29-2004 - 6:37pm
has me wondering. Personally we don't look at money as mine and his. We have all joint accounts. Neither of us has to check with the other on purchases. We buy what we need, when we want to. I don't get razzed for buying clothes, nor does he.

I've made a 6 figure income for the past 10+ years. My husband has in the past, but, he is now taking time off to stay home with our twins while I work flat out for the next 2 years. I won't make him beholdant to me because I'm earning more than he, anymore than he would, or did with me. In fact the only people in our home who have their own accounts are our twins (college fund and savings/trust fund).

I just don't get the "my money/your money" mentality. I don't get using "my" money for a vacation, or "his" money for a car. Its all our money in our house...

Just wondering how it works in your house:-)


MM, B&E

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:22pm
No, not at all. I totally can understand how someone would prefer small over large gatherings. I was just responding to your and paige assertion that it was a waste of time. Although you both seem to think I am a mind reader, I am not. Nowhere did either of you specify that it was just about you. Paige even went on to say how she couldn't understand how people could like those kinds of parties. Meaning that there must be something wrong. I don't need to understand why someone would jump out of plane to know that people enjoy it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:25pm

Hold it..you were

"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)

      &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2003
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:34pm
But when you say....."I never could understand the party scene or why people would want to do it." "I think it's a precious waste of time." it takes on negative kind of tone with regard to that different lifestyle to whch you are referring. If you couldn't POSSIBLY see why people would want to do something, then it means you must not value it at all - even for other people.

I don't think anything is wrong with how you led your life or the fact that you like small parties. I think it's fine. What I am calling you on is some of your wording and how it would lead people to believe that you hold disdain for things like: "I could never understand why people would want to do it." That indicates a feeling about parties that is not neutral, but negative. That's what I was refering to in all my posts.



iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:38pm
Again, you misunderstand.

I am free to feel that way. As others would not want to have a job, apt, bills and be "settled" I guess you could say at such an early age of 22 and younger.

They could say the same thing. Doesn't mean it is wrong for me or the other lady here that is saying the same thing. Just like how we feel isn't saying it is wrong for you & others to enjoy the life you do.

I don't understand the "college type" parties & "why people enjoy them". But that doesn't mean I think you or anybody else is wrong for enjoying them. I don't understand it. That is all. Nothing rude about that.

Value has nothing to do with it.

paige

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:39pm
It would have been a definate waste of time to me. For me to do it. Paige
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:40pm
OMG, I could have written this post. Thank you. Paige
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:42pm
That is the tone & appearance I also get from her postings & the way she talks through her postings.

I have found very little, if anything, that I can agree with her about.

Paige

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:44pm

I meant that the money goes to him first, then to his sons.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:45pm
I did all of that with the exception of the dances, other than the prom, and any parties.

I went to my jr & sr proms but I really just made an appearance. Arrived an hour late, and left within an hour.

I loved the shopping for the dress, all the hoopla of getting ready & being dressed up all formal, getting flowers from my date, going out to a fancy place for dinner with my date & friends, and loved the midnight breakfast with a small group of friends & just sitting in our formals and talking.

The dancing, no thanks. The loud music, no thanks. Just not me. But I had plenty of good friends that danced every song. As they should have partied!

Paige

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2004
Mon, 08-02-2004 - 5:46pm
I can tell you are! Good Mom! P aige

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