Am I a doormat? What would you do?
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| Tue, 05-13-2003 - 3:57pm |
Last fall I lost my great job, my field is saturated, so to keep busy and still make money, I started substitute teaching. As a result I now work 5 days a week, make only 10K a year, let my housecleaner go, so I'm working harder than ever and making less money. My husband is now making my car payment as I can't afford it, and he is doing this with a lot of resentment. I can barely afford groceries and clothes, but so far this system has been working.
Now the problem, summer is coming and I want to stay home. I won't be able to substitute, and I have no desire to pound the pavement. I want to stay home with the kids and work on the myriad of projects left undone over the years. Here's the kicker, I don't want to beg my husband for money, which I know I'll have to do. He earns a good salary (175K plus bonus, but no bonus this year due to bad economy). Our mortgage payment in total is $2600, we have 2 leased cars, no other debt, considerable savings (kids college is all saved for), yet my husband thinks I should find a job! Is he being unreasonable, or am I? I don't spend money, I'm pretty frugal, shop at TJ Maxx, etc. and am very low maintenance.
I am angry to the point of considering leaving him. I think it's incredibly selfish of him to "make" me work for the summer when we are quite capable of paying our bills and saving just on his salary. I have no qualms about returning to subbing in the fall and even going for my master's for a permanent teaching job - I really love it, but his attitude is frankly stunning. By the way, I am the ONLY one of our female friends, neighbors or aquaintances who works, most spend the summer (and all year round for that matter)playing tennis and shopping. What do you suppose his problem is? Or am I being unreasonable?
I welcome all opinions.

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Edited 5/23/2003 8:46:07 AM ET by laurenmom2boys
Okay, maybe I have only lived in wierd places, but in Austin, TX, Dallas, TX, Fort Worth, TX, almost any city in between and around DFW, TX, Miami, FL, anywhere near Dad County, FL, you don't need a teaching certificate to get hired.
In fact, in TX, you need only 90 college hours with a C average or better to sub. And as I type, DISD (Dallas Ind. School District) is conducting alertantive certification classes because there are simply not enough certified teachers to place. And these are not rough hoodlum infested unsafe schools in the Barrios. Every single year there is a teacher shortage in Dallas. (and here, teachers make anywhere from areound 35K to 50+K, which in Dallas will be a decent living, especially if you have a two-income family).
Maybe you should send all of your qualified grads who cannot get jobs to Dallas.
One thing about schools, since they are subject to local control and regulation, they are basically no standard platitudes that can be said about requirments, jobs, pay, etc.
Bottom line is, you don't what you're talking about, and you're making way too many assumptions.
The reason you presented the details that you did, was that you were sure they would support the scenario which you put forth. There was no other reason, whatsoever, for you to present any of them.
But oops. They didn't so now you have to pretend that there are more mysterious ones lurkig. Whatever. Better luck (research???) next time.
BTW, you are showing your....issues. Why would a guy who made a million dollars in one year, turn around and buy a million dollar home? That would be craziness. And he wasn't crazy. Its just wild how the world of reality differs from yours.
I'm telling you, that in my district it is ENTIRELY possible and probable. In fact, this year, odd though it is, we even have subs for the last day of school because several staff members made plans that couldn't be changed (plane reservations) and the last snow day put them over the limit....
Yes. it is entirely possible. Did you know that some inner city districts even offer a full-time Substitute Position at a full first year teacher's salary???? Yes, quite probable she could work every day.
eileen
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