Are we realy that different?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Are we realy that different?
372
Wed, 04-28-2010 - 11:15am

Often SAHMs will talk about WOHM like they are a foreign species and WOHMs do the same talking about SAHMs like they are a foreign species.

Are SAHM and WOHM really that different?

As someone who has done both I don't think so. I did not suddenly change when I returned to the work force or when I again left the work force for a few months.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 12:33pm

Kids do not like sports. They will even leave the room if they are turned on the tv. Our school does not do plays.

Polkadotandflipflops

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 2:45pm

My kids are with me most of the time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 3:14pm

One of the long list of reasons I do sah is to be w/my kids because yes, my presence to me to be with my kids is important and can't be replaced in many ways (it can be in some of the care ways, changing diapers, preparing their meals, etc).


My kids are older and yes, it does change. Or it did for us with each of our kids.


I agree with you that what I do all day is just as important as my dh's role. He agrees and will be the first to say it. He says if he was the sah his days would be pretty much just like mine. My husband helps alot but of course with my always being home usually everything is done and when he is home with me I prefer that time to be with me, the kids, or us as a family.


Now I am into the whole cleaning, cooking, being a homemaker, trying new recipes thing so that is high on my personal list. I think this is a personality thing. I was this way when I woh. Of course, my opinion was the house stuff was always far much more fun and rewarding than the job I went to daily.


I do have high expectations for myself in taking care of our home, making it a pleasurable and clean space all at the same time, being sure it is decorated & lovely place to spend our time. Again, this is just my personality.


I watched grandmothers, greatgrandmothers, aunts be sah and I wanted to be the kind of sah they all were and proudly and luckily I can say I have achieved that and continue on daily achieving that.


And as I type this I have two kids so close to me it is a wonder there won't be a 1000 typos in this so please disregard them because they are not going to give me the chance to reread or spell check ha


We ladies just keep doing what we are doing because I think in our own ways we are each doing it right for us and ours.


Polkadots&FlipFlops

Polkadotandflipflops

 

 

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 4:55pm
So your kids do not have friends or outside activities? How old are they?

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If you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
Erica Jong

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 5:10pm

Yes, they do have friends. Our teenager plays an instrument & is in the marching band. The other two are first & second graders. They don't wish to participate in any activities. We just discussed it again this week. No Go.


Polkadots&FlipFlops

Polkadotandflipflops

 

 

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 5:22pm

OK, so the teen must spend some time when he is not with you or your dh, correct? The younger two must also spend some time with friends rather than with you, I imagine.

Don't you and your dh ever go out without the kids?

*^*^*^*^*


If you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
Erica Jong

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Thu, 07-22-2010 - 5:42pm

Oh yes, dh and I enjoy going out. We have

Polkadotandflipflops

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 7:51am

if your children's experiences are different as a result of your SAH/WOH how is that not a part of parenting?


IMO, working status does have something to say about parenting.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 8:04am
i walk a very fine line in the, i stay home FOR my kids.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 8:09am

FTR, I think now my kids having known a sah they have loved being home with me all the time other than school days.


 

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