Are working moms stretched too thin?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Are working moms stretched too thin?
1078
Tue, 06-13-2006 - 2:45pm

Do you think a mom who works full-time and has kids is stretched too thin?

I was working full-time up till November of 2005. Then I decided that it was all too much. I was exhausted and found that when I did get to spend time with my little guy (he is now 2 1/2) I was very impatient with him because I was soo tired. Also the stress of work often overflowed into my personal life (both with ds and dh).

Now that I have been home for over 6 months, I am finally starting to be more patient and am enjoying my son instead of rushing him along. If he want to take 20 minutes to get into the car - ok, no problem.

So - do you think that trying to juggle work, kids, marriage and all the stresses that come with those things is too much? (I did)

Maybe when my son is older - then I will go back to work and it might be easier because he will be more self-sufficient? Who knows? All I know is that for now, I am enjoying being a SAHM and am glad for the time I get to devote to my son and the lower stress levels (that I believe were very unhealthy for me).

josee

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 4:59pm
ITA. I never understood punishing a small child for something that happened a week ago. the punishment should be short and immediate. Punishing a child for a week at a young age is extreme. Time-outs worked for me when they were younger. They would sit for a few minutes, cool down and it was over.
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:00pm
Well, I live in a city that is a major metro area, and I've done this at our neighborhood grocery store (though not because my child wouldn't get into her car seat). I shop there all the time, and I know the manager and most of the clerks. I was asked what *I* would do. But again, the point is, there are other options if you don't want to wrestle a screaming child into her car seat. If that's your preferred method of handling the situation, fine.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:01pm
a big thumbs up!!!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2006
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:03pm

You're welcome. I have no problem apologizing when in the wrong.

Kathleen

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:03pm
That is something I would never do to my children. A punishment is not meant to destroy their feelings. A 2 or 3 year old is not going to remember something from weeks ago. And to come home and rub it in their face what a good time they had is just being mean.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:04pm
at 2 years old my kids were still babies. i think you are giving 2 year olds too much credit so that you dont have to deal with age appropriate behavior.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:04pm
Disclaimer noted and BTDT. I wrote that I wouldn't call dh for dd's first steps. She walked at 16 months which is old but still within the normal range. She put her first words together at nearly 3- pretty far outside the norm and after some Early Intervention speech therapy. I definately called dh and relayed the 2-word utterance because we were both starting to panic. For the record, at age 6 she is just finishing up special ed kindy and will go into special ed 1st grade. And when she reads her first word, I will call dh!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:09pm
I work PT and love it. The plusses and minuses are exactly what you would think- you have more time but less money. We aren't really hurting for money, so I did it in part to "keep my place", so I could keep my skills and not have to start over somewhere else at a beginner's salary. Whether it is worth it or not is entirely dependent on the job. As discussed in another thread, some jobs are actually very stressful if done PT because the work load doesn't shrink in proportion to the hours cut. So it all depends on the job.
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:09pm

Well, my kids don't like to miss anything fun. If they don't leave a playdate when it's time to go, the next time they get invited on a playdate they don't get to go. I've been using this method all along, and it works for us. Sometimes we'll have to do it again, but I had to give the same consequence repeatedly for 6 months, I would try something else, because clearly the consequence I set wasn't working.

We're just going to have to agree to disagree about whether it's "beyond cruel" for a child who didn't get to go somewhere because he misbehaved to hear later that those who went had a good time. I don't consider that bragging, and I wouldn't be comfortable keeping quiet about it so as not to hurt the feelings of the child who didn't get to go because he misbehaved.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2006
Fri, 06-16-2006 - 5:11pm

Well you're not kidding there. Just thinking about that would frazzle me! LOL! Even if each of my kids had one activity going right now, I wouldn't have that much driving. I would definatly agree that them being younger was WAY EASIER!! Like I said, my son could walk to practice, and his games were about 5 minutes away by car. Hey, we had to bring our folding chairs, water bottles, a blanket......

Kathleen

Pages