Are working moms stretched too thin?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Are working moms stretched too thin?
1078
Tue, 06-13-2006 - 2:45pm

Do you think a mom who works full-time and has kids is stretched too thin?

I was working full-time up till November of 2005. Then I decided that it was all too much. I was exhausted and found that when I did get to spend time with my little guy (he is now 2 1/2) I was very impatient with him because I was soo tired. Also the stress of work often overflowed into my personal life (both with ds and dh).

Now that I have been home for over 6 months, I am finally starting to be more patient and am enjoying my son instead of rushing him along. If he want to take 20 minutes to get into the car - ok, no problem.

So - do you think that trying to juggle work, kids, marriage and all the stresses that come with those things is too much? (I did)

Maybe when my son is older - then I will go back to work and it might be easier because he will be more self-sufficient? Who knows? All I know is that for now, I am enjoying being a SAHM and am glad for the time I get to devote to my son and the lower stress levels (that I believe were very unhealthy for me).

josee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 8:31am

Probably for a similar reason that many women who work FT do everything...they just get into the habit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 8:34am

In my mom's case, I think it had to do with both.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 8:35am
Sorry, I was being snarky in response to the other's post - she emphasized it SOOOO MUCH.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:11am
That was her word. Definitely not mine!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:17am

Do you really believe you would not have gone to college if your mother had remained a SAHM?

My mother at the time had no better than a high school degree and was a SAHM. She told my sis and I that we were to *become* doctors and lawyers, not necessarily marry them! She was not to be ignored. She's a huge reason I got into the Ivy League and then went onto law school. Dad ~ a lawyer ~ really thought I should become a full-time artist!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2006
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:55am

"there is not one sahm i know who divorces while in her sah element..."

Two words for you: Lorna Wendt

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 10:47am
I am a teacher so am mostly a SAHM during the summers. And guess what? My kids (ages 10 and 14) do a lot more cooking and cleaning during the summer months, when I am home, then they do during the school year, when I am working -- because THEIR schedules permit it. I believe homework and school activities come first, which is why they sometimes get out of cooking and cleaning during the week during the school year. During the summer months, they each have one to two hours worth of chores a day. Cry me a river.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2006
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 12:17pm

"I am willing to do it for my munchkin."

I have a hard time taking seriously anyone who nicknames their child after a doughnut.

Aside from that, you want the focus to be on the kids, right? Well, if, according to you, the kids whose parents MUST work do not suffer any ill-effects from being in childcare, then why would you think that the children whose parents CHOOSE to work would suffer any ill-effects? After all, the experience for the CHILD is the same, regardless of whether or not the parent MUST or CHOOSES to work.

I have never understood the point of view that the child of the "Choose" TWOHM is suffering while the child of the "Have" TWOHM is happy as a clam, when they are having the exact same experience at daycare. Perhaps you could explain that to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 3:34pm
I'm not saying that kids who have both working parents suffer...I just think that those who are fortunate enough to have one parent stay home fare better...they benefit from the attention and more time that you would have to offer them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 3:38pm

Pumpkinangel,

Don't over analyze this. Let's just keep it simple. Any child would benefit from more attention and time. I'm not putting down working parents in any way and I turned out just fine. I just know that today I am closer to my mom because my dad chose to work 7 days a week when I would have much rather spend more time with him and get to know him better.

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