Are working moms stretched too thin?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Are working moms stretched too thin?
1078
Tue, 06-13-2006 - 2:45pm

Do you think a mom who works full-time and has kids is stretched too thin?

I was working full-time up till November of 2005. Then I decided that it was all too much. I was exhausted and found that when I did get to spend time with my little guy (he is now 2 1/2) I was very impatient with him because I was soo tired. Also the stress of work often overflowed into my personal life (both with ds and dh).

Now that I have been home for over 6 months, I am finally starting to be more patient and am enjoying my son instead of rushing him along. If he want to take 20 minutes to get into the car - ok, no problem.

So - do you think that trying to juggle work, kids, marriage and all the stresses that come with those things is too much? (I did)

Maybe when my son is older - then I will go back to work and it might be easier because he will be more self-sufficient? Who knows? All I know is that for now, I am enjoying being a SAHM and am glad for the time I get to devote to my son and the lower stress levels (that I believe were very unhealthy for me).

josee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2006
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 5:12pm
ah... another i cant support my claims so i am leaving post.
Jennie
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 5:34pm

Of course, I understand, debate boards are not for everyone.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2005
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 6:36pm
Really? You can tell among your adult friends who had SAHM or WOHM because the group with SAHM turned out better. Wow. I'm impressed because I can't.
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Wed, 06-21-2006 - 9:19pm

Why is it reasonable for you to state your opinion--that there are disadvantages to having two parents working---but it's not reasonable for others to state the contrary opinion--that there are not disadvantages to having two parents working?

Are you going to tell me that you are being reasonable because you are right?
I also believe my opinion is "right"--if I didn't, it wouldn't be my opinion.

You believe there are disadvantages. Tell us what they are. Because some of us believe there are not necessarily disadvantages to two parents working--that the 'disadvantages' are based on parenting, not work status.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 12:12am

Then, according to your words: "If any of you want to really say they are NO disadvantages to having both parents working then you have lost my respect because you are the one trying to say I am wrong and I am the one being reasonable." I'm going to lose your respect. Because for OUR family (not yours, not anybody else's), there are way more disadvantages to having only one parent working than having both of us working. We've lived it with 3 children out of necessity and we have no intention of ever doing so again (barring similar circumstances which caused the first necessity). I would rather work and have a healthy marriage with a happy dh working (and going to school) at a job/career he loves than insisting on being a sahm with a husband who makes enough for us to live on but is miserable doing so. Or being divorced and forced to work anyway. And he feels the same way.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 12:47pm
My mom was a SAHM mom. She worked at times to help my dad make ends meet.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 12:59pm

It's not about being able to support your claims or not. No one here "knows it all." I certainly don't claim to. I just stated my opinion. No matter what I say to back it up, you will still believe what you want to and choose to disagree if you want to. I just felt that some of your "tones" were hostile not only to me but to others as well. (And, I'm not referring just to one particular member, but to a number of you). But then again, I'm pregnant so maybe I'm a little too sensitive. That's why I decided to return to the post. I may have overreacted. I've been on other boards and I have to say this is the most hostile one I've visited yet. I'm pregnant and on strict bed rest so this is pretty much all I do. I've joined a lot of groups online.

I can only talk based on my experience as a child. My mom was a SAHM at times and at times she worked. I can't speak for other kids. Based on my experience, I am thinking of quitting my job once my baby is born. I live in the DC area and work for the government. I make GREAT money and I have GREAT benefits but for me it's no-brainer to quit. I plan to work from my home and become self-emplolyed. It will be my first. My first son died so that may influence my opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 1:01pm
No, maybe not for some people like yourself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 1:02pm
No, I never said I could. I'm speaking from my own experience. I also know of MANY people who agree with me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 06-22-2006 - 1:07pm

Yes, but again that is my opinion. Go ask any kid if they would choose between at least having one of their parents stay home and have both of their kids stay home, I'm sure they would want prefer the first option.

Now let me clarify, when kids get older, I believe they should attend school. I don't believe in home schooling because it takes away from social skills. I plan to go back to work when my kids are in school and they are no younger kids to take care of. But I do plan to have a job that will enable me to be home by the time they get home.

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