Are you a competitive person? (m)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Are you a competitive person? (m)
21
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 10:45am
If so, what are your outlets for your competitive nature? Is your work status irrelevant or does it help satisfy this personality trait?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 11:37am
>>>If so, what are your outlets for your competitive nature? Is your work status irrelevant or does it help satisfy this personality trait?

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Not by nature, but my dh is, so over the years I've developed a more competitive side.

We do a lot of online gaming together/v.s. , play MTG, & personally, I find my running satisfies my personal, internal desire to "win"...i.e. if I tell myself I'm going to run 2 miles & run 3 instead, I feel darn good. ;)

As for work status, I've never felt in competition with anyone at work, nor competitive w/dh insofar as working goes, so no, I think for myself work status its rather irrelevant. We both went to school for vastly different subjects & have pursued distinct careers, though, we co-own several businesses which we've always worked on together, we've always realized we each have diverse strengths, which compliment each other...in business & life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 11:49am
Interesting. Did you consider your overall personality when pursuing career/business goals?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 12:18pm
**If so, what are your outlets for your competitive nature? Is your work status irrelevant or does it help satisfy this personality trait?**

I am a competitive person and compete in almost every aspect of my life. I am not competeitive with other people per say, but I am competitive with life itself. In otherwords, I work hard to be sure my child, marriage, and self experiences are better than what I was dealt in my past as well as what I've seen in my past generations' (mother, aunts, grandma, etc.) lives.

Working outside the home helps me to have that financial stability so as not to have to DEPEND on anybody. Yes, I have a wonderful marriage, but I've seen toomany people place all their trust in the other person's income to the point that when something happens, they are financially screwed until proper legal actions are takens. Unless of course they have some savings on the side. So I work to keep myself reassured that I will have in case of a marriage failure. Also keeping myself self-sufficient also, let's my husband know that I could make it without him and that he has to be a GOOD man to me in order to be worthy to be in my life. If a man can't be something in my life of any importance, then what good is he. So, since I am self-sufficient in my finances, education, transportation, and savings, my husband has to be sure he is the loving, caring, trustworthy, fathering man he could be. If not, he knows he's not contributing anything to my life and is worthless.

Also, if I was to become a SAHP and rely on my husband's income, I would have a savings beafore I did so, as well as continue to get every type of degree I can get as well as stay up on any skills needed to remain competitive in the job market if and when I ever decided to return to work.

I also , make sure my child has all she needs in order to not fit the statistics about WOHMs. I work much harder in giving my child quality time, quantity time, love, attention, etc. Yes, it's harder, but i's worth it. My husband also does the same, just as mch as I do. We work hard at keeping our family's emotional, social, and financial needs are met.

So, as you all can see, I am very competitive in areas that usually are down played because I am either a woman in general and a working woman with a child. I rerfuse to fit the sterotype of either.

Tonya
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 12:54pm
>>>Interesting. Did you consider your overall personality when pursuing career/business goals?

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Its funny you ask because I just recently took a really long personality/job assessment test... you know, one of those things which tells you which career is best suited for your personality, natural skills, interests, etc? Well, the funny part is that the careers it suggested for me were so opposite of anything I've ever done or even considered! For example, the #1 career was accountant, #2 was engineer (of some sort, I don't remember). So...maybe no, I didn't consider my personality when persuing my career goals. Of course, I chose to get my BFA in painting, which limited some types of professions, right off the bat (i.e. engineer & accountant!). However, none of my jobs have directly related to what I did in school, or what my career goals are (primarily making our businesses WORK!).

It did make me think though...could I be a really sucessful engineer? Maybe in another life. ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2001
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 1:39pm
Not competitive, nor very ambitious ... I do love what I do. My dh feels I'm wasting my credentials ... I do not, I'm making a difference in the lives of young children, one small group at a time in my own time and not rushing about in some organized toddler room or 3yo room at a large prek and doing so on someone else's say. Personality wise ... I'm more comfortable around a small group of children than to be sitting in a large group of children being managed by several adults.

Linda

 

Linda - wife, mother, grandmum                     &nb

Avatar for cindytree
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 3:35pm
I don't have that cut-throat mentality that has to win for the sake of winning and at any cost. I don't always have to be right or win or get the recognition. I can be competitive if it is important and is something I feel strongly about. Also, if someone is being a jerk and I can win to put him/her in his/her place, I will. It is more of an issue of making a point than needing to win. I saw this more in my days of competitive tennis. I played for the love of the game, but if someone was arrogant or bad-mouthed me, look out.

I think anyone can have that competitive streak and it can manifest itself whether woh or sah. There are probably more competitive moms who woh than sah, although I'm just guessing and have no proof of that other than the fact that a sahm has less to compete with and for.


Edited 7/14/2003 3:38:25 PM ET by cindytree

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 4:31pm
Why do you think a SAHM has less to compete with and for? I know lots of SAHMs who are totally competitive through their children and childrens' accomplishments. I also know WOHMs who dislike their work, and whose work does not satisfy that competitive "itch."

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 5:34pm
I am competitive with regard to sports and games. VERY competitive. I have made strides over the years, but I HATE to lose! And if I play some kind of video game, I won't stop playing until I master it.

As for life, though, I'm really not competitive. Don't ask me how that happened! I've never gotten the "keeping up with the Jones" philosophy.

So, I guess I'm more competitive with myself than anyone else. When I was playing soccer, there was one specific move I wanted to grasp (something no other girl in the state could do), and I kept at it for 3 weeks DAILY one summer, until I got it. It wasn't about beating someone else, it just ticked me off that I couldn't do it! lol

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 6:35pm
im not competitive at all, however, no matter what i do, i do my best, which lots of times turns out to be the best of all who are involved. i just dont have that hard driving competing gene, and i think having an academically gifted brother, who is just a year older than i, cooled down my competitive spirit, before i knew it was even there to be had.

i often wonder if "competitive" people, and high achievers, are mostly type a personality. i am way type b, and not interested in any kind of competition.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 6:37pm
omg, there goes that twin thing again. i am soooo like you...

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