attachment parenting

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
attachment parenting
1781
Mon, 08-14-2006 - 3:17pm

A woman I know (I used to work with her dh) practices "attachment parenting". Here is a definition (for those who don't know what it is):

"Attachment Parenting includes respecting your child's needs, feeding on demand, and answering your baby's cries. Other parts of Attachment Parenting include co-sleeping, nursing on demand, sling or other baby carrier wearing, and cloth diapering. Not all Attachment Parents practice all of the above, but never the less love the idea of Attachment Parenting and comforting their children.

Attachment parenting uses mild discipline methods and avoids all physical or emotional punishment, such as inflicting shame on a child for inappropriate behavior. Children are encouraged and allowed to sleep with their parents, and you treat your bed as the family bed. Meeting your child's needs according to the child's time frame during the early years of development is an essential part of attachment parenting. Children will be allowed to grow and learn at their own pace and not according to standard time frames."

What do you all think of attachment parenting?

I don't see attachment parenting as something a WOH parent could do, or could they? What do u think?

I am also curious to see if SAHPs vs/ WOHPs will have different opionions on this topic.

If anyone here practices attachment parenting - was your decision to do so closely linked with your decision to be a SAHP?

josee

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Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:50pm

I don't care what all the "experts" say there ARE no experts when it comes to child rearing and there is NO right way"cure all" one size fits all style of parenting."

Agree on the last sentence, but its a fact that BM is best by a huge margin, for infants than formula. Sometimes the experts are right. And in this case they are. You can choose to ignore it but that's akin to saying exercise isnt healthy or eating a solid diet of fast food is. Believe what you want but it doesnt make it *true.*

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:50pm

"Your family doesn't provide enough data to draw meaningful conclusions. I could tell you that my primarily FF DD has had more colds than my exclusively BF son, but that isn't enough to make my point either. That's why there are large scale studies done."

Formula worked for me and I'm happy about that and I never said otherwise.

"I fully expected to hear "My children were formula fed and never sick" from at least one formula feeder."

So, you're expectations were correct.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:51pm
Actually, her debate is getting kind of silly. As she pointed out that mine was to her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:52pm
Food shouldn't be used as a comfort. It should be used to eat when someone is hungry. Not when one person is depressed or used as a tool to console oneself. That is how I want my children to see food. I want them to see hugs, and family as comfort. You can do as you like, this is what I prefer.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:54pm

"I'm sure they are. Just because BF is "better" does *not* mean kids can't be healthy w/o it. I am very passionate about BF for me, but I'd never judge another mom for choosing differently."

I feel the same way, but since we can't look at an adult and say, "She was ff, or he was bf," I often wonder if any studies have been done comparing adults who were ff to those bf. Is a ff baby who later eats a diet rich in vegetables and few processed foods as healthy as an adult as a bf baby whose parents fed her a similar diet? Are parents who are committed to bf more likely to limit the processed food?

In my case, as my son transitioned to solids, I was not about to let the benefits of breast milk go to waste by feeding DS anything processed. My MIL, who ff both her children, tries to give DS yoghurt with added sugar/splenda, marshmallows, Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, etc. Her adult children are not as healthy as I am (I was bf) but is that because she accustomed them to an unhealhy diet or because they were ff?

I'm inclined to think that what babies eat the seventeen years following their first year is more important than whether or not they have breastmilk or formula the first, but the research seems clear that all other things being equal, breast milk gives babies an advantage over their ff peers.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-1997
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:54pm
I thought the food didn't matter. Evidently it sometimes does.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 2:58pm

<<>>

Yes they do.

<<>>

You got that right. Lots of women have eating disorders and it isn't easily remedied.

<<>>

Yup again.

<<>>

YUCK. Can you imagine? I would love to see the results on that research.

I get sick of the militant BFing women. I did BF my children for 2 reasons. Nutrition and it is free. Well I did enjoy the rapid weight loss as well. However I don't think I am some superior woman because my children BF. I also think my friend that her DD was born 5 weeks early and I am going to care for her little one is a great mom and she didn't BF. She HATES BFing. She did try for 2 days with her DD but HATED it. She grew resentful and just quit. Nothing wrong with that at all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 3:00pm
What is hysterical here and that when I say the food doesn't matter one automatically hits the junk food drum. Why is that exactly? I cook every single night except on Friday nights when we order OH YES PIZZA!!!! Kids love it. Again, soup and sandwiches, or steaks and potatoes...I could care LESS. As long as my family is all sitting together and enjoying our time together I could care less what we are having. Oh yeah, we do occasionally go to McDonalds. Kids love that too!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 3:03pm
Well considering that Oprah is a total workaholic and has million dollar trainers I guess your theory is a little off. My philosophy of food must be just fine. I guess you do so well frolicking through all those farmers markets.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2006
Fri, 08-18-2006 - 3:05pm
I think you are really taking this so far that I am just totally lost.

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