attachment parenting

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
attachment parenting
1781
Mon, 08-14-2006 - 3:17pm

A woman I know (I used to work with her dh) practices "attachment parenting". Here is a definition (for those who don't know what it is):

"Attachment Parenting includes respecting your child's needs, feeding on demand, and answering your baby's cries. Other parts of Attachment Parenting include co-sleeping, nursing on demand, sling or other baby carrier wearing, and cloth diapering. Not all Attachment Parents practice all of the above, but never the less love the idea of Attachment Parenting and comforting their children.

Attachment parenting uses mild discipline methods and avoids all physical or emotional punishment, such as inflicting shame on a child for inappropriate behavior. Children are encouraged and allowed to sleep with their parents, and you treat your bed as the family bed. Meeting your child's needs according to the child's time frame during the early years of development is an essential part of attachment parenting. Children will be allowed to grow and learn at their own pace and not according to standard time frames."

What do you all think of attachment parenting?

I don't see attachment parenting as something a WOH parent could do, or could they? What do u think?

I am also curious to see if SAHPs vs/ WOHPs will have different opionions on this topic.

If anyone here practices attachment parenting - was your decision to do so closely linked with your decision to be a SAHP?

josee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 1:41pm

"I had to LOL, as many people would also describe me as "very regimented and stubborn."

If you're anything like my baby sister, you're a force to be reckoned with! And I mean the "regimented and stubborn" in a good way--I have nothing but awe and admiration for what my sister accomplishes. Despite our different parenting styles, I'm on the phone with questions for her at least three times a week--which she says is a gratifying switch from childhood when we didn't think she could even pour her own milk correctly. :)

She definitely treats SAH like an 8-5 job--very little free time for her 16 month old. They work on coloring, singing, puzzles, high chair manners, sign language, etc. every waking minute. Well, she does put him in the play pen or room for "independant play" at least twice a day--while she constructs stone pathways or flowerboxes for the garden! She sort of clucks her tongue at me when she finds out we've lazed the afternoon away in the kiddie pool. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2005
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 1:52pm
I did it this weekend, in fact. (see my post about the eggo waffles) Sometimes, good enough is really good enough.
Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 1:57pm
I'm sorry, did my fingers stutter?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 2:14pm
To me, it being detrimental that infants or FF, would mean that due to not being BF they are constantly sick, slow learners, no realtionship with mom, ect., when this is certainly not the case with most formula fed babies, so, I still do not feel that formula feeding is detrimental.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 2:22pm
Sorry, but I have never, and will never buy that breast fed babies are healthier than formula fed babies. My son is hardly ever sick, I am hardly ever sick, nor my sister, or any of my cousins, or many of my FF friends. I don't care about research on this one, I just flat out don't buy it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 2:36pm
Yep.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:11pm

"Sorry, but I have never, and will never buy that breast fed babies are healthier than formula fed babies. My son is hardly ever sick, I am hardly ever sick, nor my sister, or any of my cousins, or many of my FF friends. I don't care about research on this one, I just flat out don't buy it."

Seems like a pretty close-minded attitude. I don't always like or agree with what research indicates, but I certainly examine the evidence. You are throwing out everything that scientific researchers have found based on your own very limited IRL observation.

As one poster pointed out, the research doesn't compare one FF baby to another BF baby--rather, it suggests that if you are "hardly ever sick" and FF, maybe you would be "never sick" if BF. A BF baby in day care, for example, would be exposed to more viruses than a FF baby at home, so may get sick more than that FF baby--but, the fact is that the act of nursing produces virus-specific antibodies for a baby, so the nursing baby is more equipped to fight off illness. This is a FACT, not anecdotal observation.

You seem a little obsessed with the issue to go around asking your friends if they were FF or BF. I know whether my friends were FF or BF is the last thing on my mind when we get together, although of course I know whether they FF or BF their own babies.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:24pm
HEAVENS NO!!!! Not McDonald's and pizza!!!!!! What in the world kind of mother are you to be feeding your children such JUNK?!?! I mean what do yout think...kids are supposed to like what they eat every once in a while?!?! ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:29pm
Know what, though? It apparently was the best choice for HER, and no one can say otherwise! Who are you to judge what was best for her children? Only she can decide that, and I have to say, formula feeding was the best decission for my little family, in many ways, and I refuse to let anyone tell me otherwise.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 08-21-2006 - 3:36pm

<<<>>>

How is saying a child did not reach their full potential by being FF fact? Can yu back that up? I DO find that cruel, as I feel my son has reached his full potential in his almost two years he's been alive. What person can say, well, if he had been breatfed, then maybe that ONE time you had to stay home with him due to a cold last year, he could not have gotten it, or, maybe he would have started walking at 9 months instead of ten, or maybe he would know how to count to ten already in two languages instead of just counting to five, or MAYBE, just MAYBE, had he been breastfed, he would know all of his ABC's as opposed to just knowing them half way through! Please lady, my son has gone far beyond what I would consider a 22 month old's potential to be!

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