Being a Mom today so so different LOL

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Registered: 07-23-2003
Being a Mom today so so different LOL
58
Thu, 06-25-2009 - 11:32am
I was cleaning out my parents' place while they're in Vegas this week, and I came across this old Better Homes and Gardens book on how to raise a baby from prenatal care through the 6th year. It was printed in 1969, and it is hilarious when read from today's point of view. Here are some of the funny bits I found while skimming through it:

Activities Which Are Permitted : A good rule is to stop before you're tired, not after. Golf may be indulged in moderately, provided your doctor consents and you feel no ill effects. Forceful exercise, such as horseback riding, tennis, fast dancing, and swimming may be harmful....If you're accustomed to doing your own housework, you'll benefit by continuing to do it. It is really the best kind of diversion and exercise for you...Most doctors advise a healthy woman to walk every day, even though she's doing housework. dry.gif

Smoking and Liquor: ...opinion is divided as to whether or not smoking is more hazardous during pregnancy. If you're a heavy smoker, doctors advise that you cut down to a great extent, but you needn't quit entirely, unless your doctor recommends it. An alcoholic beverage contains between 70 and 160 calories and might be well worth eliminating from your diet if the doctor suggests cutting down your caloric intake...Ask your doctor whether or not you may drink on occasion.

Baby Grows On What You Eat: The up-to-date doctor therefore 'weighs in' his patients when they come for their regular examinations, and in most cases insists that they don't gain more than 20 pounds all told...This means that without eating any more, and generally less than you did before, you must include all the food elements...

If You're a Working Woman: If your appearance is important in your work, you'll want to quit, or arrange to work at home after that. ohmy.gif

Nausea and Vomiting: To be nauseated is perfectly normal and physiological. To let it grow into pernicious vomiting is not normal and may be psychological. dry.gif However, if you're experiencing this discomfort, it would be hard for anyone to convince you that you're imagining things!...When you're on the diet for nausea, you won't be able to keep your weight gain to a minimum as you would like. When the nausea is overcome...you may cut out the excess carbohydrates and lose some of the weight gained on the diet...

Diet For Nausea:
7:30 a.m. 2 soda crackers.

8:00 a.m. Stewed prunes (6 large), or baked apple. Cooked whole-wheat or enriched cereal with sugor or honey, and very small amount of cream. Cup of choclate with sugar. 2 slices while-wheat toast, spread with honey. No butter.

10:30 a.m. 2 slices of toast (with marmalade or jell, no butter), or 2 crackers, 1 glass of milk, cocoa, hot malted milk, or tea.

12:30 p.m. Vegetable, cream of celery or potato soup, with crackers. 2 slices of whole-wheat or enriched bread. Lettuce: 1/2 head. 1 cup custard, constarch pudding, tapioca, or 3 ounces gelatin.

4:00 p.m. Fruit juice, or tea with sugar. 2 slices of whole-wheat toast, honey or marmalade, no butter. 1 slice of sponge cake.

6:30 p.m. 1 cup of cream of pea soup, or other soups as at lunch. 2 crackers, or 2 slices of toast. Baked sweet or white potato (large) or 3 ounces of rice. 3 ounces of stewed carrots, or beets. Desserts as at lunch, 1 ounce of dates, or 1 ounce of raisins.

9:30 to 10:30 p.m. Toast or crackers. 1 glass of milk, cocoa, or malted milk.

(Did you notice that on this diet, you'd be eating at least 10 pieces of toast per day??!)


Father's Waiting Period: After your arrival at the hospital, your husband may be told that it will be many hours before delivery. Your doctor may advise him to go back to the office or home and keep in touch with the hospital. Some hospitals permit the husband to remain with his wife during labor. Others do not. However, it isn't necessary for your husband to be there. You will be sleeping some of the time, and many doctors feel that you will relax more and rest better if your husband is not present. laugh.gif

Breastfeeding: ...one of our country's foremost nutritional experts has said, "breast milk is for babies, cow's milk is for calves." To a degree this is certainly a true statement, although today, cow's milk is altered in such a way that it's now an acceptable food for a baby. ohmy.gif ...With the improved methods of preparing formulas, we can no longer argue that breast milk is safer ohmy.gif ...When you and your baby get home, your husband can do a great deal to help you continue breast feeding. He helps by being especially considerate; by being enthusiastic about the nursing project; by lending a hand at housework and baby care; by overlooking a not-quite-immaculate house. dry.gif

The New Father: ...If Father's willing, he might take care of Baby while you're busy fixing dinner or doing some of the household chores. Don't be alarmed if Father doesn't seem excited about caring for the baby. At first, the new father may be reluctant to do any more than look at the new baby. Don't be pushy; just give them time to get acquainted...Remember, with a bit of instruction, any father can give Baby a bottle, ora bath, or learn to change a diaper. However don't be surprised if he objects to changing when there's a stool in the diaper.

The Rush Hour: ...In most homes, Mother's the busiest as the evening dinner hour approaches. She's preparing the meal, trying to straighten up the house a little, and squeezing out a minute to pretty herself before her husband comes home. dry.gif If there are young children, they're probably adding to the general confusion. By the time Daddy walks into the house, her emotional tension as reached a peak. Somehow, Baby seems to feel this tension and reflects it in his irritable crying, fussing, and hunger..."

Formula Feeding: ...Cow's milk does not provide a balanced diet for an infant unless it has been diluted and sweetened before feeding. ohmy.gif

Whole Milk Formulas: First week: 16 oz. whole milk. 12 oz. water. 2 Tbs. corn syrup or 5 level Tbs. Dextrin-maltose.

Types of Formulas: Evaporated milk is probably the most economical formula available today. Evaporated milk, because of the treatment to which it is subjected, is a uniform, easily digested food which has been used with excellent success in feeding infants...Evaporated milk can be prepared for infant feeding simply by adding the prescribed amount of water, corn syrup, or a dextrin-maltose powder.

Avatar for rollmops2009
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Registered: 02-24-2009
Mon, 06-29-2009 - 6:24am
To me it is, but I find it both uncomfortable and boring to spend time in a car and dd downright has trouble tolerating it. My grandma-in-law used to love driving. She only learned in her 50s and the novelty of it apparently never wore off for her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2009
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 8:59am
Oh wow, you wouldn't like our lifestyle. We regularly drive 18 hours each way on vacation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2008
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 9:52am

He asked me if I thought I needed "help" adjusting to the pregnancy. And this was after something like 14 months of fertility treatments.


I would have hit him!

Lilypie First Birthday tickers  
Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 10:34am
Nope, I would not like that, lol. Most of the vacations we took as kids involved lots of driving and I grew to really detest it. Dd has low tolerance as well. 0-5 she usually cried most of the time she was in a car. These days we can both manage, but we consider even a 45 minute drive to be a kind of torture.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 4:59pm

And we all know a pregnant woman's body is so unpresentable that she really should quit her job if "appearance is important in her work!" I wonder what advice they gave to the chain-smoking martini-drinking overweight men.


I did find it interesting that they recommended a 20 lb weight gain for pregnancy for all women. When I was pg with my daughter, my OB recommended a 35 lb weight gain (I was anemic and underweight.) I managed to gain 30, and my daughter was 9 lbs, 9 ounces! I shudder to think what might have happened if i'd made it to 35 lbs. Recently, I read that for women who are overweight or obese when they get pg, the recommendation is for 20-25 lbs.


Of course, on that nasty diet the article recommends, most women would be throwing up enough to ensure they didn't gain too much. Who on earth can eat half a head of lettuce (assuming they meant iceberg, which is pretty much all you could get back then)?

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Registered: 05-02-2006
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 5:13pm

Well, around here driving is something you do just to get from point A to point B and with the amount of traffic it's usually more stressful than anything.

2010 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 5:29pm

Here's my modern parody of the article (sorry, couldn't resist and need to procrastinate!):


Activities Which Are Permitted : A pregnant woman can do anything her nonpregnant self can do, as long as it doesn't hurt. However, if she doesn't feel very amorous, she can show her husband this article, which strictly forbids all sexual contact for at least 8 weeks after the baby is delivered.


Smoking and Liquor: You shouldn't have CONSIDERED getting pregnant if you are addicted to tobacco. How dare you! As for alcohol, it might be okay to have a half-glass of wine on your anniversary, but if you do, you can be sure that all the other diners in the room will excoriate you and report you to CPS. You'll never live it down, you selfish witch!


Baby Grows On What You Eat: This means that you have the potential to begin ruining your child's life right now, before she is even born! Consult a nutritionist immediately and don't even think about putting a morsel in your mouth that isn't loaded with fiber and nutrients, and entirely free of pesticides,

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 8:23pm

Baby Grows On What You Eat: This means that you have the potential to begin ruining your child's life right now, before she is even born! Consult a nutritionist immediately and don't even think about putting a morsel in your mouth that isn't loaded with fiber and nutrients, and entirely free of pesticides, hormones, antibiotics, and angst. Your chickens should all be free range, and your cows treated with humanity, respect, and given names.

Bwah! The whole post is awesome, but I especially loved this paragraph :).

************

Kitty

The horrifying consequences of underaged
baking cannot be overstated.--me, because there's nothing you can't learn from teh
interwebz



************

Kitty

"If you can't annoy somebody with what you write, I think there's little point in writing."-- Kingsley Amis, British novelist, 1971 t .

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2009
Wed, 07-01-2009 - 12:42am
LOL! I love your version of this article. It should be published!
Photobucket
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Wed, 07-01-2009 - 1:11am
OMG, look at all the cuteness in your sig picture! :)

************

Kitty

The horrifying consequences of underaged
baking cannot be overstated.--me, because there's nothing you can't learn from teh
interwebz


************

Kitty

"If you can't annoy somebody with what you write, I think there's little point in writing."-- Kingsley Amis, British novelist, 1971 t .