Big Fat Lie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2003
Big Fat Lie
870
Sat, 09-11-2004 - 1:41pm
I'm the mother of 2. I have 2 boys, one is 2 1/2, the other is 4 months old. Before I had my second baby, I was a full time nurse and was making more money than my husband. That being said, he never really had a problem with it. The extra money helped us pay for extras. Well, I decided after the second child, that I would stay at home most of the week. I work only 2 days a week, 6 hours a day. Now all of the sudden, I do EVERYTHING. He does not get up at night with this baby, he does not keep the house clean with me, NOTHING I do is important enough. (He plays softball once a week, goes out with the guys after etc.) I do not do anything. (Actually I get to go to Weight Watchers on Fridays while my mom watches the kids.) I have no life anymore, and his life is fantastic! I tried to take a class, but he wouldn't help with the kids enough so I couldn't stick with it.

When we got married we were going to share all responsibilities, take care of the kids TOGETHER, do the housework TOGETHER. It was all just a BIG FAT LIE!!!!

Pages

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: debcote
Sun, 09-19-2004 - 11:15pm
Excellent point, DJ. I'm waiting for the response. I'd like to JUST ONCE see "Yes, that's contradictory to what I've written in the past" from Grimal.

I suppose when dad gets home we're supposed to go clean whatever we were supposed to have cleaned during the day while supervising our kids or go sit in the closet.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 1:12am
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (excuse me while I wipe the disbelief off my face)

Is that your idea of supervision and parenting? That explains a lot!

Anyone with a child under the age of 5 who would bring said child to the park and then open up a book to read while said child wandered off and played would be guilty of neglect and begging for a nasty accident. Anyone who imagines being able to sit for more than 2 minutes at the park with a child under the age of 2 either hasn't the first clue about children or has never actually taken such a young child to the park.

Laura

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 1:15am
Again, why is it okay for you to comment and judge other peoples lifestyle choices, yet no one is allowed to debate yours? Do you realize you are, in essence, calling your own posts stupid?

Do you understand the concept that it isnt about people *caring* what you do. Its about debating issues.

dj


Edited 9/20/2004 1:48 am ET ET by djknappsak

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 6:38am
But doing things with the kids with bouts of housework in the middle does equate with no breaks. I know that I am busy with things around the house (not necessarily housework) all afternoon. I get home from work/picking up the kids at 3 and leave for football practice at 6:30. I am busy for ALL of those 3 1/2 hours. Then I am at the football field from 6:30-8:30. Then we eat dinner (usually prepared in advance). When we get home there is no reason for dh to sit and relax while I clean up the kitchen.

Jenna

Avatar for 1969jets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 6:40am
I have 3 kids and they were born within 5 years of each other. They aren't babies any more (the oldest is 10) but they still require lots of attention. I spend a few hours a day just cooking dinner so I am not sure where the 10 hours of housework comes in. I do more than 10 hours of housework a week and I have a housekeeper who works 9 hours a week.

Jenna

Avatar for kerry88
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 8:38am
The whole tv thing doesn't concern me - everyone does what they want, it's fine. Reading this thread though, I saw you attack GKK (believe me, I think she's way off base too but I didn't call her names) but then do the exact same thing she did - chastise others for knocking the lifestyles that you posted to a debate board.

Now you're posting stuff that no one cares about, no one needs to hear - Adds nothing to the debate - so what's the point?

Kerry with Campbell Elizabeth 11.03.06 and Benjamin Brady 12.10.03
Avatar for outside_the_box_mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 8:55am
Typical response, as in, what's good for CLW is good for everyone else.

My son never walked. He *ran.* Started *running* at age 13 months. I chased him every where. I never had to put up a gate on the stairs because he was walking up and down them by 14 months. I never sat down and read a book when he was awake. I couldn't. He was *active.* The idea that I could take him to the park and sit on a bench while he played and climbed structures meant for older children is beyond belief. It is only in the last year that I can sit and read. And that's because he's seven years old.

You really need to wake up and smell the coffee. Just by reading your posts I can tell you never really spent *time* with your girls.

outside_the_box_mom

Avatar for outside_the_box_mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 8:59am
Just by reading her posts I can tell my childcare standards are no where near hers. At least when I took DS to the park, I actually took care of him. He would be dead by now if I sat on my fat butt and read a book the way she advises people to do.

outside_the_box_mom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 9:05am
Do you feed your baby during the day? Do you clean the mess from eating or the toys or does the maid follow you around the house so it can remain spotless while you play with the baby in front of the tv?

Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
In reply to: debcote
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 9:27am

It sounds to me like, in your world, the housework comes first and the kids come second.


In my world, my kids come first.



Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

Pages