biological differences between the sexes

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2007
biological differences between the sexes
61
Thu, 01-24-2008 - 4:03pm

Do you acknowledge any biological difference between the sexes when it comes to childrearing? (apart from the obvious pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding)


Is the relationship between a mother and her child unique, in terms of being different than the relationship a father has with his children, in enough cases that one could generalize and say that it is?


Do SAHDs parent in a way that is different than moms?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 1:32pm

It's really the nature of the jobs for us. I work as a librarian in academia with very flexible hours. If I wanted to, I could probably work from home about half time. Once our kids are in school, I may do that. DH, as a teacher in the public schools, won't have that flexibility. Since teaching is a female-dominated field, I'm guessing that most spouses of female teachers would be more likely to take time off, but that's just conjecture.

I will say that I have run into the stereotype at work that because I am a mom, I will be unwilling or unable to do certain things. No one I work with has small children. The one woman who did, quit to SAH. I get the impression that she took a lot of time off for kid-related stuff. And one of my coworkers has teens. She can be fairly unreliable at times. Many of my colleagues are childless, so I don't know if that factors in at all. I'm also 20 years younger than the other librarians where I work. That could play a role too. It makes me very unlikely to share my reasons for taking time off, if they relate at all to Samantha.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 2:03pm
Where I work,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 8:11pm

I think it's more of a personality thing, not a gender thing.


Now certainly, personalities have tendencies between the genders (you could say "on average" women are more nurturing and "on average" men are more type A).


But people are people.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:05am

It wasn't just my choice for me

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2007
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:14am

Our dc has always called the person who could get there fastest.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:16am

Personally I don't lack confidence in DH's ability in

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:18am

While my DH won't come home for a kid being sick(unless I need him to so I can take them to the Dr or something) he has been puked on WAY more times then I have which I guess means he pretty nurturing cause he's the one holding them when they are sick.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:21am

I remember when our first was 3 months old. DH asked me "did you know you would love him THIS much?" It really took him by surprise.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 10:30am

As much as DH does with and for our kids he never was comfortable with the baby stage. He wouldn't bathe them until they could sit up on their own. He would do everything else when needed

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2006
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 6:53pm

I think it depends on the individuals - and societal ideas - more than on biological differences between men and women. I don't feel guilty at all for being a working mom. My daughter is 5 months old, and she loves being at home with her stay-at-home daddy.


That's probably a little weird, and I hear bullsh** about it all the time from my family, but it's what works for us. I have more earning potential than he does, and I like working. It drives me crazy to stay at home. He loves being at home with her all day. Now, he hasn't seemed to pick up the whole cooking/cleaning thing lol - but I think it's great for my baby - most little girls don't get the chance to have that much early bonding time with their dad.


We might switch off in a year or two, but for now, I love that she doesn't have to be in daycare, and I don't have to feel guilty for working. =)

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