"Broadening your Horizons"

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
"Broadening your Horizons"
234
Fri, 04-04-2003 - 8:41pm
Okay, I've been scanning through the posts below, and this is something that has grabbed my attention. There are those here who seem to believe that you can only broaden your horizons by going to college or joining the peace corps or military. It also seems that doing so as a young person (directly out of high school) is preferable.

So, I'm curious about how people feel these things actually "broadened their horizons", and how that has benefited them in their lives so far. I'm also curious how you feel this has benefited you more so than someone who might have opted out of college/military/peace corps.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

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Avatar for outside_the_box_mom
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 4:52pm
According to whom?

At my college, the average student age was 27. This average person took six years to get a degree because he/she worked during the day and studied at night. The person also had a family to support.

outside_the_box_mom

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 5:04pm
Yep, I was just thinking that. At the university in my town, over 70 percent of the students are over 25, and I think about 40 percent of that constitutes people over 30. In my classes, the younger people actually stand out because they are NOT the norm.

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 5:21pm
I don't know the average age of the students where I attended but I was the oldest student in my chemical engineering class. Where I attended community college, something like 20% of the students were over 25 but the percentage of older students at university was lower. Most people don't wait to start when they're 25 like I did. Yes some go older but the norm is still to go to college right out of high school. We do a lot of maturing between 21 and 31. Graduating at 31, I was one of the old fogies (sp?). In grad school, the age of students was higher. My point, however, is that getting educated isn't a mind altering experience simply because you mature at college. Those of us who went to college late can attest to the fact that it still broadens your horizons. Perhaps even moreso than for younger students because we are a bit more mature going in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 6:14pm
They are not different. Though at 18, children and marriage were the furthest thing from my mind. I was busy having fun living out of state with my military bf (now my dh and no longer military - he gave his dream up for me)But before he and I could make any decisions about our relationship, I got pregnant. Something that I thought I could not do successfully because of my own heart problems.

Now we are 10 yrs out of hs (met dh in jr. hs)and have 3 children together. And are about to purchase our second home.I swore I would never drive a minivan (and cannot imagine driving anything but that now - LOL) I don't feel as though I have given up any goals or dreams; I just added to them and they come in the form of 3 little feet, messy faces, big smiles and lots of laughter!! I have been a sah and woh mom(currently the latter) and (maybe) I am one of the few who can say they have enjoyed both. There are ups and downs to either but neither of them have singlehandedly broadened my horizons, or educated me, they came hand in hand. I have learned that woh and school may not be one of my greatest plans but I am doing it, just as trying school 2 weeks post-partum from a c-section was a winner of an idea (conceded defeat on that one). If my dreams ever get in the way of being a good mom, then they sit on a shelf until I can pick them back up again. I am the only one who knows when my ability to be a good mom is being hindered.

I think that you might be making more out of this than there really is. See, I never said that the things I have done have benefited me any more than someone who has not done those things. That is not why I do them. It is not my concern if someone else had those experiences or not. It is their own personal experiences that make them who they are, not who I am and it does not matter to me if you woh, sah, eat bon bons (I prefer chocolate fudge brownie from B&J - YUM!) or whatever.

Your goal and dream is not different than mine except that (10 yrs ago) it was not mine. If broadenING your horizons is important to you; keep posting to the board, read with an open mind and remember your experiences are yours alone. (that is what I am doing)

Don't worry or debate the differences of a dream (it deflates the dream when you do. Keep in mind that you would never do this to your child), Instead celebrate the rights to have dreams and support those who want to reach them (that will broaden your horizons)

Oh yeah and one more thing, keep enjoying your dreams - your children will thank you for it.

much respect -

nikki

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 6:41pm
No one "needs" to do anything, however, I'd say it's something you want to do if you want to get the most out of life. You don't "need" to ever look beyond your own back yard but you're not going to get the most out of life if you live it with blinders on. The little plant that is root bound in it's pot doesn't need to be transplanted into the garden unless it wants to grow bigger. It can always stay little and root bound and never even know there is a garden out there.
Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 6:46pm
I went to a state college about 20 freeway minutes from my home. I didn't go to broaden my horizons, but to get an education. I was two years out of high school because I had attended junior college to figure out what I wanted to do. At that time, I had a new boyfriend, my first love.

I lived in the dorm my first year of state college because my parents thought it was a good idea. I never spent a weekend there. I went to class during the week, got good grades, learned a lot, but I didn't feel like I belonged or even wanted to be there.

Looking back, I wish I hadn't had that boyfriend. I would have tried out for the school soccer team, attended sporting events, etc. I think I missed a lot of social things that could have broadened my personal horizons. I *did* come out with one very good friend with whom I keep in touch and see regularly however. And I'm doing something remotely releated to my degree.

I value the experience, but I think other things in my life have broadened my horizons in a much bigger and more valuable way. And I'm the first and only one in my family to attend and graduate college. (You know, I've never thought of that before.....)

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 6:49pm
Please, there will no clarifying of your original post. Attempts to backpedal will be met with severe keyboard lashings......LOL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 6:57pm
LOL...I find it amazing that you can be so judgemental, yet consider yourself so enlightened. :(

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

Avatar for cyndiluwho
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 7:38pm
Elightened enough to know that many things in life don't matter. It's hardly judgemental to say that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Sat, 04-05-2003 - 7:52pm
Very true...I can agree with that. Many things in life do not matter. However, what those things are differ from person to person. To me, a college education doesn't matter. To you, staying home with your kids doesn't matter. To someone else, having children may not matter. It is all dependent on what you want in your life for you.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

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