Can

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2003
Can
7
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 8:13pm
Listen I know everyone is "very" busy. I feel as if just because I am new here no one is answering my questions. Well ok. I guess no one else works or they don't have kids that are going through this problem. Thank you very much. I thought that I would get some kind of Feed back from this board but I guess I was wrong. People even "wasted" their time responding to the mytaebobizcom person. Is that what I need to do. Try to advertise for a stay at home business. I may be way off here if so I know no one will tell me that I am. Thank you again people some support you are.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 8:20pm
Do you have the right board? I can't find another post of yours.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 8:34pm
It's under QOTW, entitled "Need Advice On Work". Sorry, mom21977, I didn't answer you because I didn't really have anything valuable to offer you. Perhaps someone else can help you. I'll bump it up so maybe it will be seen. --->Dawn
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 8:45pm
First - let me apologize for being such a bad hostess - even after somany months of this new format, I tend to get "lost". PLUS I just haven't been on line enough lately welcoming everyone and doing my thing - my apologies to all.

I did read your post under QOTW and I think that you have some great questions in terms of the debate. But you seem to be looking for advice, and while boy will you get it here with this wonderful group of people, you may want to turn to the support boards such as:

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-psninetofive or http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-psworkingmom (hmmm no thinking of returning to work board, is that yet another example of the societal bias against WOHM ;-) )

I sincerely invite you to stay, although I have found that this board has surfaced more questions for me personally than provided answers. Those I have had to provide for myself once I realized the question.

Good luck!

SUS

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 8:48pm
Sorry, I don't ever read the last couple sections .. only the hot stuff! lol

After having read your OP and this one, I have this to say.

Your *kids* will have less of a problem with this than you will. They're hardier and adapt better to change. One thing I can suggest to ease their transition is to take them to their new daycare several times before you actually start work FT. For a few hours or a whole day. So that if they do happen to freak out (some do .. but usually only last a day or two) you're immediately available. I always try to give my kids a couple of half days at daycare before they go a whole day.

Get a pager or a cell phone. Call the daycare a couple of times the first day to check on them.

And the list of things you are "about to become?" You've already been those things. Only the "employee" part was added. But thats a big part.

Plan meals so you don't have to go to the grocery store each day. Put potatoes in the oven in the morning and set them to time bake. Make crockpot meals. Lay out the kids clothes (and yours) the night before. Make lunches the night before. And make sure your dh does his sshare too. His responsiblity should also increase.

Anyhoo .. those are just a few ideas off the top of my head.

Hollie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 11:33am
I did read your post but didnt feel that I had anything to contribute. I stayed home for 2 years and now woh pt. My dh is home with the children when I am at work. So I really havent gone through what you are going through now, although I do sympathize!! I realize it must be a difficult transition.

Unfortunately, a lot of times the messages in the personal section get skipped over. Mainly because this board *isnt* a support board. Its a debate board and people come here to get involved in the debates. I dont think anyone intentionally overlooked your post, there were just a lot of heated debates going on right about the time you posted!

dj

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 12:30pm
It is against the rules of ivillage to advertise for anything on the message boards. When someone does it, they obviously did not read the TOS before posting here, and that usually warrants some disrespect from other posters. As to the other advice you requested, I know I never saw it.

PS... this is not a support board, it is a debate board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
In reply to: mom21977
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 2:39pm
I also tend to overlook the less "debatable" topics... my bad.

I also thought that since this board is so "active" there would be many people posting to your question, saying pretty much what I would have said.

Now, my response is...

It must be hard to transition into WOH/DC. There is no one answer for every woman. You will figure out what works for you then will need to adjust as things come up. I have "you need to help out more" talk with my dh every so often because as much as he *tries* I think he forgets so I have to remind him. I agree with some of the other posters' advices... plan ahead as much as you can. Make a meal list so that you don't spend a ton of time at the market. Make quick meals. Freeze meals. Clean when you can, but (if you feel Ok about it) live with a less than immaculately clean house. Your dh will need to help you out also.

Re: DC -- I have less experience with it since my dd has had a nanny since she was 6 weeks old, but see the other thread about dc above (don't be freaked out by the initial post, though, as there *are* good DCs out there) and the advice given there.

Re: *support* -- one of my first posts on this board (I'm fairly new here too) was one looking for support and I got it so I don't everyone here's just looking for debates. But you can also go to the WOH support board if that's more what you're looking for.

Good luck.