A Clean House is a Sign of a Wasted Life?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
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Registered: 11-13-2008
A Clean House is a Sign of a Wasted Life?
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Tue, 01-07-2014 - 9:35am

From Time.com, the author takes a look at her life and whether if you put too much time into domestic chores it takes away from your career:

In the early morning stillness, before the house was teeming with other people who needed things from me, I found myself engrossed in an opinion piece by Stephen Marche, “The Case for Filth.” His essay sprang off a study showing that young men today are not doing any more housework than their fathers did 30 years ago.

In the days immediately following its publication, Marche’s essay was hammered. “If there is a God, this guy will spend the afterlife scrubbing toilets and vacuuming,” tweeted feminist author Jessica Valenti, joining a chorus of critics. And she was right. Marche makes a pseudo-intellectual argument for why men don’t do their share of the chores (“Even the most basic housework proves ethereal on inspection”) while demeaning women in the process (“Millions of young women are deeply attracted to the gloomy vice of domestic labor”).

Still, I must confess: When I came to Marche’s penultimate sentence—“A clean house is the sign of a wasted life, truly”—my day was suddenly shot. I found myself sitting there at the kitchen island, rattled, wondering if I was, in fact, truly wasting my life. “Let them eat crust” echoed in my mind.

In this sense, a “clean house” isn’t merely about picking up dirty socks or putting away the dishes. It is about taking on a kind of hidden housework: making a home that is warm and inviting, comfortable and comforting; creating a space where my children’s friends like to hang out and we as a family feel ensconced; and knowing, as Marche himself puts it, “who likes what on their sandwiches.”

But doing all of this takes time, lots of time. And, though my husband does his share, often there aren’t enough hours in the day to manage my home and family as well as I’d like and to be a writer, too.

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2014/01/06/making-sense-of-mess-finding-meaning-in-household-chores/

The only way I survived when I was working full time after my twins were born was that I was able to keep using the woman who would come clean my house every week while I was on bedrest.   It's very hard to do it all, and something will suffer at some point, whether it being your own sanity or time with your family.  

What do you think?  Do you have a messy or a clean house?

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Avatar for savcal2011
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Wed, 01-08-2014 - 4:08pm

bordwithyou wrote:
One of my daily chores this time of year is that the dogs track in mud and snow that melts on the kitchen floor and I end up mopping the kitchen every single night. We have a largish kitchen; it ends up taking twenty minutes to get that done. No big deal, except normal clean up, add mopping and a thirty minute job putting away the dinner things and wiping down the tables and counters becomes an almost an hour long job.

Part of why I love my husband. He does the nightly kitchen (non-floor) duties.  We go to bed everynight with all the dishes put away (either clean in the cupboards, or dirty in the dishwasher).  The floor? Different story, lol.  

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

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Registered: 12-22-2013

My house is never 100% clean. There's probably no single room that is ever 100% clean for more than about 5 minutes.

Really? lol

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Registered: 12-22-2013

We have more than ample closet space.   My hanging clothes aren't inches apart or anything, but they're definitely not smushed together.

That's what I figure when people say they iron their clothes and then hang them up. My parents used to share the closet I use now when my mom did not work. I don't even have enough room for my own stuff in there let alone anyone else's lol. My dh shares my ds's closet and my dd has her own which is packed with clothes and shoes. My shoes are so bad that I now have them in boxes piled up and it is a pain trying to get them when I need them. We have a hall closet with jackets that is just full. 

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Registered: 12-22-2013

Part of why I love my husband. He does the nightly kitchen (non-floor) duties.  We go to bed everynight with all the dishes put away (either clean in the cupboards, or dirty in the dishwasher).  The floor? Different story, lol.  

Yeah, I can't have anything left in the sink unless my dishwasher is full (which it would be running then). 

Avatar for savcal2011
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Wed, 01-08-2014 - 4:34pm

blackandwhitemolly wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">My house is never 100% clean. There's probably no single room that is ever 100% clean for more than about 5 minutes.</span></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>Really? lol</span></span></strong></p>

Really.  With four active people and two pets in the house, 5 minutes after cleaning the toilet's been used, or someone has eaten a snack, or someone has taken off their shoes in the living room, etc, etc. 

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

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Registered: 12-22-2013

Really.  With four active people and two pets in the house, 5 minutes after cleaning the toilet's been used, or someone has eaten a snack, or someone has taken off their shoes in the living room, etc, etc. 

lol. Certain places in my house constantly need straightening up for those reasons too. I don't think any room will ever stay 100% immaculate ever. lol. Straightened up, yes. 

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Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 01-08-2014 - 4:57pm

blackandwhitemolly wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">One of my daily chores this time of year is that the dogs track in mud and snow that melts on the kitchen floor and I end up mopping the kitchen every single night. We have a largish kitchen; it ends up taking twenty minutes to get that done. No big deal, except normal clean up, add mopping and a thirty minute job putting away the dinner things and wiping down the tables and counters becomes an almost an hour long job.</span></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>No one else helps? If I cook, my dh will put things away and clean up. If he cooks, I will do the same. The kids need to clean their plates and put them either in the sink or dishwasher. </span></span></strong></p>

My son is only home for dinner two or three nights a week now. My husband empties the dishwasher in the morning and makes coffee.  He is very tidy and doesn't leave things lying about.  However, he is hopeless at actual cleaning.  He has very low vision and can't really see well enough to see many spills, for instance if he drips coffee on the counter, and it leaves a spot, he will never see it. Same with the floor.  It has to be a real mess before he can see spots on the floor.  I used to often wonder why someone as neat as he is could stand things like water spots on the faucets and whatnot, and I finally realized he literally does not see them.

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Registered: 12-22-2013
Wed, 01-08-2014 - 6:42pm

Sometimes I think I am the only one who can see in my house. lol. 

Avatar for savcal2011
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Wed, 01-08-2014 - 8:18pm

And just because ... my closet.

Attachment: 

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

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Registered: 10-23-2001
Thu, 01-09-2014 - 5:15am

blackandwhitemolly wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">I don't want to be "always cleaning something", I want to be doing other things than cleaning.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">I'm not but when I pass by something and it looks like something needs to be put away or cleaned, it takes a few seconds to do it. This is not a deep cleaning session that will take hours and I don't have time for anything else in the day. A quick wipe down of a dirty counter takes a few seconds. A quick run of the vacuum, a quick putting away a pair of shoes, throwing clothes in the hamper. None of those things take very long and affect anything else I want to do in life.</span></p>

Exactly.  I sweep the hardwoods regularly, I may find a sock and call on a kid to find the mate and throw it in the laundry basket, I organize the piles of stuff on the desk from medical records to school forms and homework.  I don't know, I am an organized person and I like order, I like central locations for things too. 

 


 


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