Direct benefits of SAH to child?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
Direct benefits of SAH to child?
1384
Wed, 11-14-2007 - 4:20pm

In one of the other threads,

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Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 7:21am

Big families have their own rewards, lol.

Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 7:33am

Lol, I hope my kids don't take up bowling!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:09am

Frustration is the prime cause of child abuse? No, frustration can be the breaking point but if someone is burning their child with cigarettes, beating them with belts, starving and locking them in closets is not bourne of frustration. There are issues much deeper than that.

Please do not insults abused children by minimizing what they went thru simply b/c of parental frustration.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:11am

Already answered in my last post. But, you really need to stop simplifing child abuse with just frustration.

Frustration is having a colicky baby and crying and yelling b/c you cannot handle it.

Frustration is not a colicky baby who you throw against the wall b/c you cannot handle it.

Edited to add: Why it get sme upset? I have been floated down to the ER quite a few times. I have seen the result of children getting abused (thank god we are not a ped hospital and we send them to Children's HOspital after stable) and I highly doubt it was b/c the parents are beating them and breaking bones just simply out of frustration.

Here is one of many websites (none of which claims simple frustraiton as the prime cause of child abuse):

http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm

Edited 11/20/2007 8:15 am ET by debbiemom2girls




Edited 11/20/2007 8:25 am ET by debbiemom2girls
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:13am

Lol...I am the *least* athletic person I know. My dh enjoys watching sports but has not played a lot of team sports.

However, I have two of the most athletic girls that I know. They love team and individual sports....go figure!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:24am
Then clearly that's a different approach than what I've been used to, which is "Make sure there's a good place in the house for homework and a good time to do it, but otherwise stay out of it unless your child wants and really needs your help. And if they seem to want a lot of help, check with the teacher". Welcome advice for the slacker parent ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:26am

Isn't that what we were talking about?

I never sit with my oldest dd (or my first grader for that fact) and do their homework with them. But, she is in fourth grade and I do check it and will answer questions for her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2007
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:37am

I think that frustration can be "a" cause of child abuse.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:47am
it is not simplifing child abuse it is understanding that child abuse takes many different forms.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 8:48am

You are talking about being overtired and overwrought.

The difference between what you wrote and someone who abuses their child is that you are not a child abuser. You knew to put her down adn get help. Someone with mental problems, who experienced past abuse or are devoid of emotional attachment, is going to take that frustration and abuse their child.

If someone had shaken their baby, it is probably b/c they suffer form PPD and the frustration of the baby cying is the last straw.

I never said frustration could not be one of the causes just that in no way is it ever the *prime* cause of child abuse.

I mean sexual abuse is child abuse. Emotional abuse if child abuse. Sild said her intial search showed frustration as the cause of child abus.

Most of us get frustrated but know when not to cross that line. A child abuser does not know when to stop and doesn't stop.

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