Divorce rulings on SAHM's alimony?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2003
Divorce rulings on SAHM's alimony?
1358
Thu, 04-29-2004 - 10:29pm
I have seen this many times, and I am wondering what your guys' opinion on this. Of course with divorce rates so high we find couples with children in court all the time finding out what is entitled to mothers for alimony. The argument is, should SAHM's receive more alimony then WOHM's? This meaning SAHM's who have through the whole marriage stayed at home with the children while the fathers successeds in their careers. This also meaning if they are going to pursue a career after the fact is their income be significant enough compared to the EX since they have been out of the work force for years and has not gained experience in what ever career the would have pursued.

I personally know someone who went through the exsact same thing and had a hard time finding a job(with income compareable) after the divorse since she hadn't worked for 25yrs.

The question also arise, does the SAHM contribute to the Fathers success because they choose to stay home therefore they should receive a cut now that they are divorced (the same as many would if they were still married)?

Thoughts? Please state weather you are a SAHM or WOHM when you place your comments

Be who you are and say what you feel because those  who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 4:58pm
I only know one man who feels strongly that his wife should SAH.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:00pm

By that train of thought, there must be some times when a WOH DH (to a SAH DW) would want to be especially nice to his DW because of what she has been doing for his kid/him/the home.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:01pm
Because it may be determined that you already reaped the benefits? It may be determined that had you not supported your husband your lifestyle would have been much different (as in less) for decades. It may be determined that your husband could have openned the business without your help (don't single people do it)? It may be determined that the asset split post divorce will more than compenstate you for your effort?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:01pm
So I'm supposed to say "I wouldn't choose it for my family because... I don't feel like it"?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:03pm
So he always does his fair share of childcare and chores around the house? You always defer to each other on how to invest or spend disposable income?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:03pm
Also, to add... I never said a parent shouldn't go to school full time, I said they shouldn't go to medical school full time, which is actually a whole heck of a lot more than full time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:05pm
That should be obvious.. kids don't know if they are spending only 2 hours with you after school instead of 3, but they sure as hell can tell if they don't see you at all every week.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:06pm
And you accuse me of making things up! She already POSTED she is and has been a WOHM and her ex has never supported her financially, including now. (What, to believe that alimony may be necessary or desirable in some circumstances, it has to be something which you would seek yourself?) And she already POSTED that he AGREED to her moving out of state with the kids. She's no hypocrite nor is she "punishing" him - they worked it out like big boys and girls with the best interest of the kids in mind.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:08pm
(shrug) well... in the case of almost all the SAHMS I know, it's just not true.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 5:09pm

My dh does his fair share of chores and childcare.

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