Do you care if your children work?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2003
Do you care if your children work?
442
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 12:15pm

The reason I throw it out there is because a women told me a story and went something like this.


Her father's best friend saw her at a family party and asked what she was doing and she said she was a mother with 3 beautiful children. He was very happy for her and asked where she worked and she said she stayed at home. So he asked where she worked before she had children and she said my son is in high school, I married right out of graduate school and never worked out of the home.


He said, "Wow - what a waste." Of course she was offended.


It ends up she has a masters in Engineering - went to some very good colleges and graduate school. The total cost being in the $75K range, about 15 years ago.


Now I don't think that somebody should forgo an education if they plan to stay at home but would you agree to pay for graduate school, law school, med school, etc. if you children did not plan to work?


My husband and I do not plan to fully pay for our kids college or graduate school but if I did I think I would be a little disappointed if they never worked.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-1998
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 4:41pm

There are two types of people: those

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:06pm

We are not paying for any graduate school for our children are have/are helping to pay for their bachelor degrees.

It is a gift, something we want to do for them and like any other gift there are no strings attached.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:13pm

You can not take out a loan in your child's name.

You can take out a parent loan in your name and/or your child can take out a student loan in their name. Taking out a loan in someone elses name is not an option.

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:13pm
I agree completely on that last point. As for Harvard Law, you reminded me of my old friend who got a full ride to Harvard Law. After 3 months he was bored to tears and begged the dean to be transferred to the history department. No go, so he dropped out and became a diplomat (possible back in the dark ages).

*^*^*^*^*

To be is to do - Plato
To be or not to be - Hamlet
Do-be-do-be-do - Sinatra

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2010
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:39pm
It my *expectation* that all of my children will go to college.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 6:08pm
They might. Most financial aid packages are have a component called "expected parental contribution."
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 7:23pm
I don't think planning to sah is the same thing as never planning to work. How does an 18-yr-old plan never to work? Is the expectation that parents will support this person until he or she finds a spouse willing to do the same?
Avatar for mom34101
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 7:25pm
I know lots of people who've chosen to sah, but nobody who has planned her life around never working. I don't see how that's even possible.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 7:47pm

Yes, I graduated high school and went to work. I would never entertain the idea (not that they would) that my parents would support me. Allow me to live with them, yes. Even my teenager plans to live home during the college years so if after graduation wants to live here, I'm fine with that.


Polkadots&FlipFlops

Polkadotandflipflops

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 8:16pm
My children will be allowed to live with me after high school in two potential ways: 1) rent free if they are in school or 2) as a rent-paying contributor to the household.

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