Do you think a SAHM should go back to...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2003
Do you think a SAHM should go back to...
1368
Fri, 09-05-2003 - 11:46am

Do you think a SAHM should go back to work once the kids start school?



  • Absolutely, why shouldn't she? There's no reason why she shouldn't.
  • It's up to her & her family.
  • No, not really. What do the kids being in school have to do w/ her working?


You will not be able to change your vote.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:05pm
Definitely! American communities have tended to build out rather than up, creating a sprawl that is nearly impossible to service effectively with public transportation. This isn't true of all cities (NY and San Francisco come to mind as examples where public transport can work), but I think it is true of most. With a large number of people concentrated in a relatively small area, it is easy to set up a system that will be used.

But there is, I think, another element to it: public transportation in Europe is seen as useable for everyone. By this I mean that everyone from the very very rich down to the poverty stricken uses the system on a regular basis. Zurich public transport was amazing to watch in that regard...you'd have the clearly rich dripping in diamonds and tag heuer watches sitting right up against the junkie trying to figure out how to smoke pot on the tram. Sweden isn't that extreme since the wealth range is not nearly as broad, but no one turns up their noses at taking the bus or tram sometimes. In the US, the feeling is very often that public transportation is only for those unfortunate poor people who don't have cars or lost their license for some reason. We have always had a car, but there have been plenty of times when it made far more sense to take public (even with small kids in strollers) and I have never had a problem doing that.

Laura

edited to correct spelling errors, I need to get to bed!!


Edited 9/11/2003 5:09:09 PM ET by laura_w2

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:09pm
Hey, maybe you can start a nationwide campaign, call it "Take back the family dinner", and instead of a little pink ribbon, you could fashion a little pin of a small drumstick.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:10pm
One of the benefits of having four children, IMO, is that you have to carefully consider your extracurricular schedule to give balance, some fairness, and sanity within the family. There is no way that I can have each child in every single activity they indicate an interest in, it just can't happen (whereas someone with one child possibly could indulge her child.) So we have to really think about who needs what, who wants what, and how it will play out with our family life. We have really tried hard to let each kid pursue interests they are passionate about. I am in the middle of trying to find a Latin tutor for kid#1 and deciding on dance or gymnastics for kid#2. Kids#3 and 4 will probably get swimming lessons and a music class if I can do it while the others are at school. My schedule gets complicated quickly but I know that I am unlikely to sacrifice our time as a family for after-school activities. I'm sure it will be much more difficult once they are all in school.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:15pm
I don't even know if it's the tendency to build out.. I think there is just so much more room. Like in CA... many towns and cities started small, and they are *quite* far apart, the nearest town to me even now is 15 miles away. There are only 6000 people in my town. It would make zero sense to have public trans. here... and it's not because we build out instead of up! It's just there's a lot more room between towns. I would really like it if Amtrak (trains) were more afforable. Right now, it's cheaper to fly. Who knows.. maybe people don't like buses and trains or something. In Santa Cruz, I rode the city bus ALL the time, even when I was nursing a newborn. It's sure a lot easier than driving a lot of the time. But here... no. Many places in the US... just not possible.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:30pm
I TOTALLY agree! The parents who drive their kids are an incredible pain in the a$$. They jam traffic on the 2 main roads, plus make it impossible for anyone who has to be in the schools (you know, teachers, subs, ME) to get into school.

It's not like the kids need to be afraid to ride the buses, they aren't exactly populated with hoodlums. Plus the (car) drop offs are dropped off one at a time, and escorted into the school by chaperones. It takes forever. It's freakin' ridiculous. This is a real pet peeve with me, I truly think this is one of those things some sahm's feel they should do to justify their existence.

Hold on, just running to get my flame suit on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:35pm
Its already been done, actually. William Doherty from the University of Minnesota has started a movement called Putting Families First and it is being implemented in Wayzata, Minnesota. They have had a National Eat Dinner With Your Family (or something like that) Night recently. Sorry, I don't think they have a drumstick pin but you should write to them and suggest it!!

http://puttingfamilyfirst.us/index.html

The group has actually been pretty effective in protesting some of the more outrageous family-unfriendly policies in area sports organizations. I think they got the football team to stop practicing on Sunday mornings, or some such thing. It is a pretty powerful movement here in Minnesota.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:40pm
Actually somebody did. I read about it in Newsweek awhile back. It was an article about a group of families in some school districts that were trying to make sports practise less frequent.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:42pm
A drumstick? Hardly the icon I'd use. I don't have time for campaigning.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:43pm
Hey thanks. My Dh & I will read this & pass along to our friends. S.V.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2003
Thu, 09-11-2003 - 5:44pm
Hoorah for them.

S.V.

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