Do you think you should rely on a man?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Do you think you should rely on a man?
1648
Mon, 09-09-2013 - 3:45pm

I thought the following article was a good read.  It conveys an important message that whatever you decide to do, be prepared to support yourself because you can't count on a man to be there to take care of you.   The author found herself divorced, her ex quit his job and she had a very hard time making ends meet: 

No matter what you do in life, whether you aspire to career greatness or whether you embrace motherhood and housekeeping with open arms, or whether you find yourself doing both of these things at the same time, do it well. Do it with everything you have, with all your heart and with great gusto. But do it wisely.

Don't ever make the same mistake I did and put your life in someone else's hands. And always, always, ALWAYS have a Plan B.

Tell your daughters and your granddaughters and all the other girls in your life this: It's OK to fall in love and have babies and be the homemaker. It's also OK to go to law school or business school or medical school or to beauty school or trade school. In fact, it's more than OK if you want to do BOTH. Better than OK... it's the smart thing to do. Tell our girls that they really can have it all, but ALL on their terms.

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-ball/mama-dont-let-your-babies_grow-up-to-be-housewives_b_3773133.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents

This is something I feel very strongly about, you never know what life has in store for you so you should be prepared.  

What do you think of her advice? 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:43pm
Yes, but we were talking about out of town friends. Seeing all of our friends, remember?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:44pm

<<No, I am not "always" doing that, only a handful of times and done them in response to your "I'm sorry" posts, they are tonque in cheek.  I have asked you numerous times, why on earth you would be sorry because someone is doing something different...no answer....crickets.

No crickets.....I have been busy, you know, getting in shape, having a balance in my life. >>

Ah yes, you were just distracting with those high level potato chip and name tag conversations.  

<<Not saying sorry and a bummer many times? Bawhhhaa...good try. Stop nagging. I am not your family, I won't give in.>>

Why is that you have to tray and  insult a poster rather than have a conversation?   Did you miss the irony of this insult while complaining about projecting insults where there are none?  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2013
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:45pm

I do not set how you can set all of your friends several times a month and still have time for much else. I usually have one social lunch a week and several evening social events a month. If I were to see all my friends, even those within an hour's driving distance, several times a month, I'd be out socializing three-four nights a week. And yes, I would find that exhausting.

We all get together at one time or we go to 2 different things on some weekends with different sets of friends. We have football parties, new years eve, superbowl, poker parties, bbq's, birthday parties, you name it where we all get together. I try to combine all my friends as much as possible and it has always worked out well. Then we have friends that we just get together with them on a one on one basis and the same for the grup of friends. My dh has a bunch of friends he sees too on a regular basis. He usually will go out for a few hours on weeknights with them to play pool, etc. Others he sees when they come into town. They come over our house or go out to lunch, etc. We always have something going on with somebody.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2013
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:47pm

Yes, but we were talking about out of town friends. Seeing all of our friends, remember?

No, you never said out of town friends in the beginning as you said you have friends around, remember? Savcal started talking about her friends being out of town. I have always said that the majority of my friends are in the same state. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:47pm

tanchick2013 wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">Interesting, you have knocked: gardening, reading and friends that are far away.  Not a single person has knocked going out with friends in the way you describe 3-5 times a month.  </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">No, I have NOT knocked those things IN GENERAL. I knocked them if you are going to choose them OVER people.</span></strong></p>

Oh, you were knocking something no one said?   This must be the make believe that the poster mentioned.

 

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2013
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:48pm

<<No, I am not "always" doing that, only a handful of times and done them in response to your "I'm sorry" posts, they are tonque in cheek.  I have asked you numerous times, why on earth you would be sorry because someone is doing something different...no answer....crickets.

No crickets.....I have been busy, you know, getting in shape, having a balance in my life. >>

Ah yes, you were just distracting with those high level potato chip and name tag conversations.  

Distracting by keeping myself healthy? Bawahhhaa...maybe you should try it sometime.

<<Not saying sorry and a bummer many times? Bawhhhaa...good try. Stop nagging. I am not your family, I won't give in.>>

Why is that you have to tray and  insult a poster rather than have a conversation?   Did you miss the irony of this insult while complaining about projecting insults where there are none?  

You take that as an insult? I guess it is something you must do on a regular basis and actually feel bad for doing it but don't stop. lol.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2013
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:49pm

Oh, you were knocking something no one said?   This must be the make believe that the poster mentioned.

 Again, I knocked them IF they are chosen OVER people. Sigh.......

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:49pm

tanchick2013 wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">Well, I would only be discussing the posting of pictures here on ivillage as I have you blocked on facebook, and I haven't seen any photos posted here.  </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">Nope, they are on my facebook. They are easily seen if I am not blocked <img src="/forums/sites/all/libraries/tinymce/jscripts/tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/img/smiley-laughing.gif" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" border="0" /></span></strong></p>

But again, as I have told you a dozen times, you are blocked on my facebook.  I wouldn't see them on facebook because again, you are blocked on facebook due to the past poor behavior, I will not unblock on facebook. I wouldn't comment seeing them on facebook because I wouldn't for anything, unblock on facebook so "if" I made the comment about seeing them....then it would again, have to be here, not on facebook because...well blocked on facebook.  Blocked.  On.  Facebook.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:51pm

tanchick2013 wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">It doesn't matter how little I spend on food if I have to pay for several tanks of gas, hotel rooms, etc.</span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">That's the benefit of having friends closer to home, little gas, no hotel rooms.</span></strong></p>

I enjoy having friends both far and wide.  :)

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2013
Thu, 09-12-2013 - 8:51pm

But again, as I have told you a dozen times, you are blocked on my facebook.  I wouldn't see them on facebook because again, you are blocked on facebook due to the past poor behavior, I will not unblock on facebook. I wouldn't comment seeing them on facebook because I wouldn't for anything, unblock on facebook so "if" I made the comment about seeing them....then it would again, have to be here, not on facebook because...well blocked on facebook.  Blocked.  On.  Facebook.

I KNOW you have me blocked. You DO know that others do not and I am SURE my "stalkers" check it out all the time since comments have come back to me indicating that they have seen certain things on it.

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