Do you think you should rely on a man?

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Do you think you should rely on a man?
1648
Mon, 09-09-2013 - 3:45pm

I thought the following article was a good read.  It conveys an important message that whatever you decide to do, be prepared to support yourself because you can't count on a man to be there to take care of you.   The author found herself divorced, her ex quit his job and she had a very hard time making ends meet: 

No matter what you do in life, whether you aspire to career greatness or whether you embrace motherhood and housekeeping with open arms, or whether you find yourself doing both of these things at the same time, do it well. Do it with everything you have, with all your heart and with great gusto. But do it wisely.

Don't ever make the same mistake I did and put your life in someone else's hands. And always, always, ALWAYS have a Plan B.

Tell your daughters and your granddaughters and all the other girls in your life this: It's OK to fall in love and have babies and be the homemaker. It's also OK to go to law school or business school or medical school or to beauty school or trade school. In fact, it's more than OK if you want to do BOTH. Better than OK... it's the smart thing to do. Tell our girls that they really can have it all, but ALL on their terms.

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jennifer-ball/mama-dont-let-your-babies_grow-up-to-be-housewives_b_3773133.html?utm_hp_ref=parents&ir=Parents

This is something I feel very strongly about, you never know what life has in store for you so you should be prepared.  

What do you think of her advice? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 10:53am

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">savcal2011</em> wrote:</div>  <strong>I think you mock it because *I* said it - if it was said by jamblesmess or thardon, you wouldn't mock it.&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;What does my relationship with 840 other friends/acquaintances have to do with my relationship with my close personal friends? </strong>&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Did you really unapologetically use the insulting appellations "jamblessmess and thardon?"  Are you really that crass?  How disgusting.</p>

Sticks and stones...  I don't think all supervisors behave like what's written here however. 

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 12:58pm

Hey Thardy--didn't you just tell me that your are just reading others' posts which quote PKA? lol


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 6:10pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="color:#000000; font-family:'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; font-size:16px">Hey Thardy--didn't you just tell me that your are just reading others' posts which quote PKA? lol</span></p><p><span style="color:#000000; font-family:'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; font-size:16px"><br /></span></p>

Definitely.  I no longer read any of PKA's posts.  Any confirmation of the improper use of "irony" was based on reading quotes in your and Jamblessed's responses.  Why that's celebrated as such an honor, I couldn't say.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 6:17pm

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">thardy2001</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;&lt;blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"&gt;&lt;div class="quote-author"&gt;&lt;em class="placeholder"&gt;savcal2011&lt;/em&gt; wrote:&lt;/div&gt;  &lt;strong&gt;I think you mock it because *I* said it - if it was said by jamblesmess or thardon, you wouldn't mock it.&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;What does my relationship with 840 other friends/acquaintances have to do with my relationship with my close personal friends? &lt;/strong&gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;Did you really unapologetically use the insulting appellations "jamblessmess and thardon?"  Are you really that crass?  How disgusting.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Sticks and stones...  I don't think all supervisors behave like what's written here however. </p>

Real supervisors of staff with any meaningful compensation simply don't have time to post here, maintain almost a thousand FB friends and play candy crush all day.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 7:53pm

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">savcal2011</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;&lt;blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"&gt;&lt;div class="quote-author"&gt;&lt;em class="placeholder"&gt;mortyswife&lt;/em&gt; wrote:&lt;/div&gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"&amp;gt;Taking the time to come here just to argue with strangers....sometimes the irony makes me lol.&amp;lt;/span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;strong&amp;gt;&amp;lt;span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"&amp;gt;Not really since I have checked my facebook quite a few times already today and read ALL the status'. Shrug.&amp;lt;/span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/strong&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;I was away from my computer, and not really on my phone much, from about 5:30 yesterday until about two hours ago. There were hundreds and hundreds of things on my newsfeed in that time.  I've skimmed it .. but I didn't scroll all the way back to yesterday at 5:30.  I skimmed my notifications and read many of them, but not all.   I read the posts in which I was tagged.    I highly doubt my life is going to suffer because I didn't read every post and every notification. Shrug.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>You're online an awful lot talking about your life.  "Suffering" isn't a word morty would use to describe hers. </p>

Of course  not, well unless it fit the conversation but then it can change at a moments notice so that it's all a fairy tale where one can have it all.  :)

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sun, 09-22-2013 - 7:54pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="color:#000000; font-family:'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; font-size:16px">Hey Thardy--didn't you just tell me that your are just reading others' posts which quote PKA? lol</span></p><p><span style="color:#000000; font-family:'times new roman', 'new york', times, serif; font-size:16px"><br /></span></p>

Psst...that's still reading my posts, lol.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Sun, 01-05-2014 - 2:39am

of course women shouldn't depend upon a man. look at marital law and see why they shouldn't. pre-nupts are a joke. i can't tell you how many women i've known who were put out to pasture because he wanted someone younger.

my mother, a closeted lesbian, married men because she thought she needed one to buy a house. when she realized that wasn't the case, she divorced and stayed that way until her death. one more thing, if a woman decides to be in a relationship and works outside of the home, the spouse needs to work in the home. my mil did that and still waits on him hand and foot. my mom did it because she couldn't choose husbands very well. they refused to support us and cheated on her.  i told my spouse that if i must work inside and outside of the house, i would live alone. i mean it, and every woman should feel the same way.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2014
Fri, 01-10-2014 - 1:57pm