Expectations on your children...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Expectations on your children...
958
Thu, 06-03-2004 - 1:56pm
Wrt their working status/parenting as an adult?

If you SAH, will you encourage your daughter (or son) to do the same? How would you feel if they chose different from the path you have taken as a parent?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:00am
Which is probably why *actual* professionals buy trucks with ramps and equipment with lockable or retractable casters.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:02am
I feel for you. I am sorry the xw is being so merciless with you so soon after your dh's death.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:04am
Good luck with that. Because I know a skinny little girl (not mine) who was recently told she CAN'T be on the AAA hockey team because she's too small. She really is a great athlete but quite frankly, she would get literally broken out there with those boys. She gets hurt more than she should on the soccer field with girls. There is a point where expectations do need to be managed. In this particular case, the expectations of the parents really required the managing - the kid is only 10. It would be one thing if they weren't suprised, but they were fit to be tied when she didn't make it and furious over the *why* of it all. I was watching this reality show the other night - I think its called Wanna Be Superstar or something. Egad.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-29-2004
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:06am
That was definitely the way to do it. I crammed for every exam, that I can remember. I even took No-doz religiously in law school! Very, very bad, I know.

Say you worked right out of college. What would you have to offer an employer over say the high school grad who got straight As, was on many clubs and teams and spent a semester abroad? Other than a better ability to write, since I crammed for exams and forgot much of the course materials within a week and because I believe much of work involves on-the-job training anyway, I'm not sure why college is so essential to employers these days.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:10am

Tsk, tsk......No Doz...wow!


I had much more to offer my first employer out of college than an 18 year old high school graduate.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:13am
Being able to get a good job is not an erroneous requirement for being not dependant upon some other adult for the support of ones self and ones offspring. And the desire that an adult child be able to support themself and their offspring is not erroneous either. A University diploma increases the chances of that good job being possible in the long term. It adds a pretty good degree of flexibility. Its a 4 year investment at a time when many people don't have a good idea of what they want to do anyway - to make things somewhat easier later on. Most young men who fancy a lifestyle that involves some degree of food, comfort and entertainment, but no job, will undertake to find a way to make lots of money to make this possible for themselves. Most young women with the same mindset will stil undertake to find a young man who is willing to make this possible for them. Its a problem.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:18am
The website I referenced has sections for all sorts of lawyers, including those that are not in private practice (city attorneys, law clerks, etc.).

LTB is insistent that if she were to return to the workforce that she would be no better off than a high school graduate with no education. And that simply is not true.

Jenna

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:21am
Its more difficulty than anyone needs to plan into their lives. Its simply just not as well done later as earlier. Thats all there is too it. If I had a child who would throw away a sizable inheritance because they didn't want to spend 4 years in University sometime before their 30th birthday...that right there, to me, inidcates prodgeny that did not get the realistic perspective/common sense gene, and my money should find a more worthy home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:26am
They aren't permitted to choose their own education path? Whats stopping them, exactly? Nothing that ammounts to more than an adult toddler temper tantrum. A University education provides future life options and flexibility in terms of employment opportunity that a trade skill won't. Simple. Its also a neat personality test. Anyone who'd toss away a sizeable inheritance because they didn't want a University education...well, it says things about that person.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:27am
I gotcha, and I agree that she's better off.

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