Expectations on your children...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Expectations on your children...
958
Thu, 06-03-2004 - 1:56pm
Wrt their working status/parenting as an adult?

If you SAH, will you encourage your daughter (or son) to do the same? How would you feel if they chose different from the path you have taken as a parent?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 10:50am
>>How much more planning can a sahm do than I did - college and law school then several yrs of work? If I were to divorce in 5 yrs, I'd be in an almost equal position as is FSW -in fact, she's probably better off since her brother owns restaurants.<<

No, YOU'RE better off because you have the means to be self-sufficient. You have at least two degrees (undergrad and law) and several years work experience in the legal field. How can you equate yourself with someone who has zero work experience and a high school diploma?

I'm not going to be your cheerleader on this issue, but I think you're way off base.

>>Should no woman sah to raise children?<<

Yeah, that's *exactly* what I'm saying {{rolling my eyes}}.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 10:55am
No, actually it simply says that its entirely possible the adult children's idea of what is good for them won't gel with mine. And its MY money. The children can make whatever decisions they want for themselves. As its my money, I have every right to consider under what circumstances I believe a child will be a good enough risk to either make good use of it - or to deserve it, for that matter. Once they have it, under the circumstances being considered, they can do whatever they want with it - so I have the right to set up criteria to mitigate the risk of it being used as I would rather it weren't. This is nothing like how parents treat young children with respect to meaningful ammounts of money. I spend tons "on" my children regularily. They have very little say in the how and where of most of it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 10:59am
Yet the military, as much as any employer, distinguishes between people with university degrees, and those without. Moresoe, in fact, as I understand it. Heck, I don't know how they do it in the States, but here, they positively OWN their own universities! I suppose the figure those educations provide something IN ADDITION TO the experience that military life provides.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:01am
You simply refuse to admit that the degree provides extra options and flexibility. Either YOU are living proof that a university education doesn't give anyone a clue (I never said it did actually) or YOU are living proof that without a university education, people can't see reality. Which is it?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:04am
Day in and day out your husband is very likely going to hold up much better than you are as a professional mover. Occassional forays into physical exertion aren't the same as doing it day in and day out. Your body will be taxed to a greater extent than your husbands as it tries to manage the demands. There is more to it than muscle stength too...joint stength, bone stength...it all factors in when something becomes routine.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:16am
Yes, but those never were a problem for me and I'm merely a strong woman. Much less so for the average man. The average female isn't going to set herself up for competition with the average man by working out. That only builds muscle. Joints, bones and other body components, all of which will be actually affected by the regular exersion, you are more or less stuck with. Heavy labour jobs provide the conditionning...for both the men and women. The men are going to start ahead and stay ahead. And with less wear and tear overall.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:17am
Kind of like you'd advise would be lawyers to avoid articling?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:21am
Its not forgotten so much as not readily available. I crammed for everything - its simply a more time efficient way of studying for the same result. But the information isn't the thing...my degree isn't even remotely related to my profession. Its the ability to learn and assimilate and analyze information - whether I particularily want to or not - interest not withstanding - while considering what end point someone in a position of power is hoping for - whether its my endpoint of choice or not - sometimes really quite quickly and under the gun - that is the real benefit.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:23am
Yes and if stats are available on this they will show you without question, that mature students in the age bracket of 23-27 have children far more often than 18-22 year olds.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 11:26am
There is really only one kind.

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