Expectations on your children...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Expectations on your children...
958
Thu, 06-03-2004 - 1:56pm
Wrt their working status/parenting as an adult?

If you SAH, will you encourage your daughter (or son) to do the same? How would you feel if they chose different from the path you have taken as a parent?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 2:25pm
Oh of corse.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 2:53pm
I mean that clerky stint that law students usually end up doing, I believe, after finishing school and before receiving full accreditation. Whether, more or less they want to, or are good at it, or not. The point being...many many many training programs involve a student to persue and complete successfully, a whole range of functions they may well hope to never ever ever have to persue once they have attained their endpoint status. Be it lawyer, or master carpenter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 2:56pm
I know what it entails. However, I seriously doubt this true...

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First off, I would expect having the degree would make one somewhat more lucky in terms of officer program candidacy. Second...if that person were to leave the military, the degree is going to be widely applicable to the workforce. A good number of military trades won't be.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:01pm
Believe what you like, but there's no reason in the world that a normally fit woman could not succeed as a carpenter other than she doesn't WANT to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:27pm
And cranes, and forklifts, and ramps. All things which work amazingly well at moving wheeled equipment. I truly DON'T believe Men were invented to haul things so that we weak and frail helpless women didn't have to endanger our manicures.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:29pm
SHHHHH! Don't tell my husband, he'll make me haul the garbage can out myself!!!!

Mondo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:32pm

Going from Officer to Enlisted is very hard.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:33pm
that' doesn't make the statement untrue; it only means you refuse to accept it because it flies in the face of your predecided view on things. Somewhat more than 50% of the enlisted people I served with on active duty had a college degree (two of them had masters). The degree, while somewhat helpful in getting them started (they enlisted as E-3's whereas without a degree you started as an E-1), but by the end of 4 years, we were all E-5's. And it meant NOTHING in terms of promotions to E-6 and up; I got my E-6 3 and in some cases 4 years before many of them--mainly because I had gone into the Reserves where an E-6 slot was available and they were still on active duty.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:33pm
Whatever it is you're talking about, that's not something done by lawyers in the US. And if all people are required to carry sacks of concrete and frame out houses in order to become, say, furnituremakers, that's a new one on me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 3:49pm
"Setting conditions upon the terms under which they will have access to my money is not controlling the children, nor is it treating them like children. It is treating them specifically like adults - that would be, people for whom I am absolutely no longer financially responsible, and its treating the money specifically like its mine - that would be, not theirs."

I very much agree.

I have two adult children. We do still pay some of their expences but there are conditions. The condition is that they are in college. We pay their auto insurance, we pay their cell phone bills (minus any overage they acquire), we pay their medical expences. We will pay them as long as they are in college. We pay them because it is very hard to make enough money to be financially independent while attending college full time.

Next May when DD1 graduates we will no longer pay her expences. Since she will not longer be in college she will be able to work the hours needed to pay her own expences.

If DD3 decides not to go to college then we will not pay her expences. Again because if she is not going to school she will be able to work the hours she needs to pay her own expences.

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