Expectations on your children...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Expectations on your children...
958
Thu, 06-03-2004 - 1:56pm
Wrt their working status/parenting as an adult?

If you SAH, will you encourage your daughter (or son) to do the same? How would you feel if they chose different from the path you have taken as a parent?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:21am
Where you get your information from is beyond me. I have read her posts and simply cannot come to the conclusion that the only job opportunities she may have must come from family. Certainly, she has indicated there are several opps she could take advantage of if she chose to or needed to. She has identified several marketable skills that she posseses herself. I don't know that she is not independently wealthy. She very well may be. How do you know that she is not?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:23am

No I dont think its any more of your buisness if either of our marriages break up.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:24am
<<>>

What, pray tell, is the difference? She refused to go college because she decided not to.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:29am
I don't assume anything, I look at facts. Take a look at the consumer debt index. Encouraging children to carry a mortgage, but no other debt is exactly what I am talking about. I don't assume that university brain washes students. Not at all. It is a continuation however, of the conventional teachings that we receive in high school. To follow the norm and be realistic etc etc. It teaches nothing about financial matters. Nothing. I am teaching my children not to carry a mortgage, or any consumer debt - unless it is making them money. If I had learned what I now know about money before university, I would still have attended, but not on student loans.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:33am
Wow, if that isn't the narrowest perception wrt family and lifestyle choices in the 21st century, I don't know what is! No one should be financially dependent? Come on! Couples absolutely should have the right to make that decision for their own family without being ridiculed on an internet debate board or anywhere else! She and her husband have made the decision that she will run the house and he will earn the money. It is called a division of labor and all organizations abide by it. She has proven time and time again that she does not HAVE TO BE dependent on her dh. THEY have chosen this lifestyle and should it fall apart tomorrow, she would need to provide for herself. Who are you to state what anyone should be ok with? That is down right arrogant!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:37am
Assume what you will, but I do not live in la la land LOL. I live right here on good ole earth. I in fact do realize that my children may be limited in some or another capacity, however I maintain that if they, or anyone else's children, want something badly enough they will overcome the obstacles and meet their goals. I was just reading in our local paper this morning about a young man born with no arms who aspired to be a drummer. In spite of all the negative thinkers and discouragment, he became a drummer. And a fine one at that. He also plays piano. Had he listened to those who told him to be realistic he may have never attempted. The will of some is most definately stronger than the perceived limits.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:43am
It subtle, I know.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:44am
We're not going to get into finances discussion again.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:47am
Do you really think her parents encouraged her to carry a mortgage and forgot the oft associated lesson of... "but not one on swamp land in Florida" part...

What lesson about money, relevant to the reality of student loan debt, did you not know when you chose student loan debt?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2003
Thu, 06-10-2004 - 10:55am
Oh many many lessons, too many to identify here, and I realize that listing those lessons are pointless since you and others of like minds are not open to new knowlege that goes against what you already *know*. I will summarize what I have learned simply to say that it is possible to have everything your heart desires money wise, and not go into debt. It is possible to become very wealthy starting with nothing. I know that it is possible because I have done it and I have watched others do it. If you are truly interested in challenging your old beliefs and creating your own destiny, a good start is to read Rich Dad Poor Dad. Although I don't agree with *all* his concepts, it is a good quick read that clearly illustrates the point. It is also a good start to a financial education, but it is only a start.

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