~Forgive a Cheating Spouse??~

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2005
~Forgive a Cheating Spouse??~
867
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 7:58pm

Would you or could you possibly forgive a cheating spouse? Why or why not??

Is there hope after infidelity?

Do you think SAHM's are more likely to forgive a cheating husband then WOHM's due to financial dependence/independence?

~Jenn

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2005
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 11:44am

I sent a second message on the board saying I sent this message to the wrong person.
I did not mean for it to go to you.
I meant for it to go to one that started this topic.sorry!

sarah

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 12:00pm

Are you assuming that anyone who is mentall ill or an addict *knows* that they are from the get-go? For someone who claims such knowledge of mental illness, your posts reek of ignorance.


So if your dh went into the marriage with no knowledge or understanding that he might have sexual addiction or mental illness, if it were something that came to light only well after the marriage, would you just ignore that little *in sickness and in health* vow that you took?


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 1:00pm
Fugeddaboudit... lost cause here. More manifesto than debate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2005
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 1:07pm
The situation is mani-festering, LOL. How's that for a coinage.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 1:28pm

I know I know. I dont know why I am bothering!!


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 3:28pm
Brilliant LOL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 3:30pm
It's just that it's so hard to believe...you tend to feel like there must be some kind of a misunderstanding.. but there isn't.. There's just *no* understanding...
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 9:36pm
LOL, I could have said things a lot more crudely. There is nothing wrong with my language. No swear words. Not even a vulgar word. Just blunt and to the point.


Edited 6/2/2005 9:37 pm ET ET by kbmamm
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 9:39pm

LOL, Yes I sense a trend. Well, when they figure it out, they can get back to me. In the meantime, I'm getting on with my life.

This is exactly the problem. How long do you invest? I say none until they have proved themselves and they can go do that off by themselves.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2004
Thu, 06-02-2005 - 9:44pm

If you don't like my technique, then don't debate with me.

Prove your point or forget it. I've detailed why I think leaving is the thing to do. Counter point if you have them.

That other people make different decisions doesn't prove anything. People do all sorts of things for all sorts of reasons, some good some bad. The point here is to debate WHY you think things should be a certain way.

For exmaple, why do you think you should stay with someone who disrespects you enough to cheat on you? Someone who has proven untrustworthyness by breaking his vows? Someone who thought little of taking risks with your health? Go ahead, give your reasons why you think I'm wrong to say that walking away is the best tactic.

Yes, I think women should walk. Because they shouldn't put up with disrespect. Because they shouldn't put up with an untrustworthy spouse. Because it will take time for said spouse to change and prove they've changed IF they can change and IF they can prove it (the IF's are the biggest words in that sentence).

I've given my reasons, now give yours. Why do you think she should stay?

Pages